Ok, I must say that even though I feel a million percent better emotionally since I found this site, I still have concerns, doubts, disbeliefs, etc. For instance, how can I be a healthy, active career minded woman one day and be knocked on my behind by muscle aches, burning skin, anxiety attacks, dizzy spells and headaches the next? How can my once firm body turn to wrinkles and a flabby gut within mere months? How can I have clear, pretty skin when I go to bed and wake up with an age spot and dry flakes on my cheeks? This is so unreal and might I add so unfair!! How can hormones take away the me I've worked so hard to get for the last 45 years? How can a pefectly sane woman turn into a raging lunatic just because her daughter cut the vegetables to big?? This has really thrown me for a loop the last four months....I can only imagine what I'm going to wake up to tomorrow!!!

Hi there imhowold, geez... those sure are some good questions and if you happen to find the answers PLEASE share with me.Doesn't this seem so unfair, I really hate feeling like this !!!!!! Cathy

I'm with you IM. I had a pretty difficult childhood and didn't really start getting it together until my 30s. My early 40s were the best for me (once I got over that 4 0 thing!). I survived raising young children and had a pretty good career. Then one day right before 44 - BAM! My whole life changed as I felt like I couldn't control myself from one moment to the next. One year later I'm finally trying to put myself back together. Getting my self confidence back seems to be the hardest as I no longer always trust my body or emotions.

I know exactly how it feels, to not know what is going to happen next! I hate to say this but I have always maintained the same weight except for when I was pregnant. Since I have been going through all of the changes I have lost about 7 pounds when the anxiety was absolutely terrible, and from being on meds. To now gaining 7 pounds and having it all go to my waistline. I have to get bigger pants because the only thing I feel comfortable in is trackpants. Not that I couldn't use the weight gain but I did not expect it all at once. The other problem I have is fatique and aching all over. I can't seem to have an abundance of energy and I cannot go a day without one part of me or the other aching. It is fustrating! The only good thing is that I know what is going on with me and my body and I know that I am not going crazy anymore!

IM,
I ask myself those same questions every single day. I was hit hard almost overnight also about a year and a half ago. I still cannot believe what's happening to me. I still have incredible health anxiety and constantly think that something else has got to be wrong. I freak over every little perceivable change in my body. New symptoms are popping up all the time, and my anxiety soars over them. I'm so tired of twitching, of all the aches and pains, of the constant anxiety, and lately, of not being able to sleep (in addition to the long list of other symptoms I have). I am angry mostly that I have been hit so hard by this. I just want to feel good again, feel like myself, and not worry about what feels wrong with my body each day, how bad it might get, and whether or not there is something more going on. How can this be happening to me???

I stand in front of the mirror and say, "who the h*%% are you?" I don't even recognize myself.
I hope I reach the point soon where the world's stupid indifference and ignorance to all of this empowers me.
It is so nice to have this place to come to.
A place to...
get energized...to vent...to cry...to laugh...to learn...to make friends...

well I sometimes stand in front of mirror and say "Mom? Is that YOU?" or on even worse day, "DAD!!!!?????" All I can say is that the only way we can feel better about ourselves is by following our healthy diets and sticking to an exercise program. I sometimes find comfort by saying - all those women in Hollywood have to do this (at much younger ages) and so can I? I do feel more energetic if I strictly follow my own advice here...but I am not a saint either. I have weaknesses too!!!! My health is just now more important than my own personal weaknesses.

Suzanne

Angelindskies, I would gaze into the mirror at some stranger too, wondering where "I" went. At the same time I was struggling with severe anxiety and moderate depression. These symptoms seemed to be the first ones in my perimenopause journey, about six years ago. In the last year or so, I have become more comfortable with the face in the mirror. I'm getting used to this new person, and discovering she's not so bad after all. If I look long enough, I can see past the wrinkles, past the blotchy skin, past the gray hair... and in my brown eyes, I can see the real me. Just four years ago, I didn't believe that would ever happen.

Some days are still difficult for me, but my anxiety and depression have lessened a lot. Suzanne has very sound advice about diet and exercise. I truly believe these two things make a huge difference in how we feel. On the whole, I'm feeling better, and I know that you will too. Just hang in there -- it gets better, it really does!

RedFox