One extra complication for my libido now (I am 53 and postmenopausal) is that I get so hot when I am in close bodily contact that we both get clammy and uncomfortable. My libido has been sliding recently (and my husband prefers that I inititiate because he enjoys me enjoying sex, so we haven't done much), but I think it may be mainly because I am a blast furnace .. with all the moisture in the wrong places. I'd like to get all hot and bothered again, but not by the sweats! I don't want to dabble with pharmaceuticals, so I haven't done anything other than minimal nutritional adjustments for menopause so far. Any ideas?

I'm going through the same thing. When I first heard about this from a girlfriend, it sounded so strange...I couldn't imajine it would happen to me but it did. First of all, it doesn't happen all of the time but more at certain times of day or night so maybe you can time that. Also if the room is anywhere near hot that makes it worse so cool off the room. And one other thing that may sound strange but keep your top part of your body from touching your husband and you may not get the hot flash. Sounds wierd but works for me.Frances

tangerine:  As I am going to be 53 this month, your post caught my eye.  I too get sweaty and uncomfortable.  Fortunately, my husband is being patient, and as long as I give him some attention and affection, he's happy.  I think in this transition time, after years of babies demanding our bodies, husbands needing us, etc., we just prefer less of that, how shall I put it, one on one time.  I've read that you can still be sexy in old age, so I'm not worrying that it's all gone away.  I'm hoping when this hardest part of menopause has eased, the desire to "merge" will come back.  However, I don't expect to be a kid again.  Neither does my husband, fortunately.