I'm going to start Celexa again. Very low dosage and slooow in the beginning. I'm tired of feeling anxious all of the time. Depression is starting to set in and I'm not enjoying life anymore. Maybe I could get by with 10mg instead of 20. Time will tell. I'll keep you ladies posted. Oh if you're on anti-depressants, please post your experiences. I would love to hear about it.

Gia - I TOTALLY gave in, too. Got really depressed in February and tried every natural remedy I could think of (herbs, acupuncture, massage, therapy, vitamins, Revival). Finally gave in and took Wellbutrin, but it didn't fix things and created a whole set of other problems. Started feeling lots better when I gave up and started weaning off the medication. And now I'm mostly fine. Weird, of course, but fine. But then, I was weird to begin with - it's just a different weird. Good luck, sweetie. I always said I'd never take anything, but life is too short for these stupid rules when things get bad. Keep me/us posted on how you're doing. We've all been there and you have all the sympathy you need. Otter

Gia, Lexapro saved my life (along with power-surge and a supportive family) when I "crashed" in April. I'm on 10 mgs. It hasn't taken everything away, but I'm so much better. Actually find happiness in things again - who'd have thought it possible? My doc has recommended staying on a full year (I also read this in "Depression for Dummies"), as it's common to relapse if you don't. I have no side effects from the medication, so this isn't a problem. I wish you luck, Gia. BTW, it took a full 6 weeks to even begin seeing improvement, so don't get discouraged. By 2 months, I was so much better. And I have a real fear of medications, but this one has been nothing but a huge help! Jacquie Thinking of you, Jacquie

Gia, Did you have a bad reaction before? Slow and low is the way to go. I'd print my long miserable med ride, but don't want to bore anyone.

I don't think I'm depressed...just anxious. I'd got the fidgetty thing with the gippy tum yesterday and woke this morning with the inner trembles and thought I'd likely feel the same again today! It helps to have something to take the edge off even if you keep off them most of the time. I prefer low diazepam and have had no side effects. I should visit my doctor for some more but you have to make an appointment (long wait) and then a long wait in the surgery (docs office) so I probably wouldn't turn up. At least when i visit my dentist I rarely get to sit in the waiting room!

Yes ChrisCarol, I started paxil at 10mg then got bumped to 20mg. Holy cow, I honestly felt like I electrified! I had day with PA's from hell! I took 5 .50 xanax in 3 hours before I passed out. These darn doctors need to understand the side effects before prescribing meds. Anxious people need to start out low and slow with a benzo on the side.

Hi Alice - What's a gippy tum?

Gippy tum (pronounced jippy).. when it feels unsettled ...playing up.

That reminds me, I think doctors might pay attention if we reported all side effects to the manufacturers and the manufacturers would revise suggested dosages. A pharmaceutical rep lives next door to me and he said they definitely want to hear about it, because they "teach" doctors how to prescribe the medicines. And they do want satisfied customers or they won't be able to push, er, I mean sell, as many drugs. So call those manufacturers! Look on the Internet or just call 800 information and report all side effects. You may be helping someone else down the line.

I think one of the doctors in Suzanne Sommers book had a good point when he said that if depression is caused by dwindling hormones, as it often is in peri or meno, you are just masking the symptom with antidepressants. In these cases, it really does seem to make more sense to treat the *cause* of the problem, possibly with a low dose natural estrogen. As much as I'd rather use nothing at all, when you have intractable symptoms they really should be treated, preferrably with something that treats the actual cause of the problem.

I agree with your about hormones, Aimee, but I was almost becoming incapcitated with anxiety and needed to get back on the AD's. I see my doctor next month and I'm going to have her do a hormonal panel. For some reason I can't convince her that I've been going through peri-meno. Gee, I'm only having hot flashes, night sweats, palps and periods every 45 -50 days for the past two years.

Hi all- even though I'm at 5mgs of Celexa I've started to feel the agitation symptom today. It feels like my insides are vibrating. Not particularly anxious or panciky, definitely a feeling like I had way too much coffee. I'm only at 5mgs. Most docs prescribe at 20mgs! Can you imagine going through this 10 times worse? Having been through this exercise, the symptoms do wear off. The upside is I feel great mentally. I'm not obsessing as frequently throughout the day anymore. Now I wish my period would start...

Aimee - I agree about the hormones, too - but in my case, we'd already tried that and hadn't gotten anywhere (So Gia, it doesn't necessarily work). Now I'm back off both the AD and the estrogen, feeling great, still with no clue what caused the depression to begin with. Makes me worry it will come back as mysteriously as it came, so I'm going to ignore thinking about that and just enjoy every happy hour I can get my hands on. Good luck, Gia - I'm glad you're a little better even if jittery. Otter

Personally, the AD pooped out at around age 39. I also started having night sweats around the same time. Then I went on a crazy try a psychotropic ride. I've come to the conclusion the hormones can be stronger than the meds. SSRIS are usually the recommended class of drugs for PMDD, so I would think that could carry over into Peri. More estrogen didn't help. Time is my ally. The jitters should pass. God, I recall being so desperate and throwing up on Serzone daily in hopes of relief. NO CIGAR there after weeks of throwing up. I was desperate. I wouldn't take Serzone again, as it can cause liver damage. Gia, Glad you feel better!!! You too Otter. Depression and anxiety can be dreadful. I also have a LONG history of a nasty premenstrum. Heck, my gynecologist was the first to prescribe Prozac for my severe PMS. This was at about the same time double blind studies showed that natural progesterone did squat for PMS, ala Katherine Dalton. My gyn. had followed that route previously. GOD, this has been a long ride.sigh

It has gotten better, however. I still take Effexor and just added low dose nortriptyline. WHATEVER WORKS!!!

Nortriptline (sp?) made my heart race big time! Wow! I guess everyone is different with meds and hormones.

Med poop out is common, so that's another good reason for starting with a low dosage. Also, since the estrogen is high, then low, if you have a history of bad PMS, your brain reacts to the shifts, since it is like kindling, in it's reaction to hormonal shifts. I hate progesterone, so take a baby dose of estrodial in patch form. It is recommended just use HRT in peri, to relieve flashes, for only 5 yrs. I don't get Suzanne wanting to cling to her periods. And, since NHRT is unstudied I can't imagine why a breast cancer survivor would take the risk. I also say, WHATEVER WORKS!!!;)

I have been on Paxil for 5 years at 10mg. It probably doesn't even work for me anymore (put on because of panic attacks) but....because of my anxiety I am scared to try and go off of it because I read all those scary stories on the internet. (seizures, suicide, anxiety from hell). Then I am talking to a woman at my daughters riding lesson and she was on Paxil 40mg for 3 years and just stopped taking them in one day because she didn't know you had to wean yourself off. I said "What happened" imaginging the worst of course because that is my personality and she said "Nothing". Ohhhhhhhhh to be that carefree and not "What ifing" all the time.

Paxil and Effexor are suppose to be equally difficult to stop. I weaned off Effexor, but unfortunately 9mos. later was hit by peri panic from hell. I had NO withdrawal symptoms, but weaned slowly. I also have heard horror stories about people's discomfort when they skipped a day of the medication. I never noticed anything skipping a day. I do think it's best to wean, however. Prozac is likely the easiest to get off of. Essentially, according to my psychiatrist and studies, all SSRIS work the same, but their withdrawal can vary due to drug clearance, I would think.

You're paxil dosage is on the low side which is probably why it stopped working. At any rate, if you really want to get off of paxil, start by going from 10mgs to 7.5 for a week to 5mgs another week alternating between 7.5 and 5mgs, etc. I did this with Celexa with no side effects. Unfortunately, paxil is the worst one to wean off of. Good luck!

Well ladies, I've made it to day 4 @5mgs. I plan on bumping to 7.5mgs on Thursday. I know I'll feel slightly jittery but that should pass in a few hours. My goal is to make it 10mgs and stay there. I feel better already. But then, that could be a placebo effect.

Gia - great news! And who cares if it's a placebo effect - as long as you feel better. Happy for you, my dear Otter

It could be placebo, but the SSRIS supposedly work quickly for PMDD, so perhaps they'd work quickly for peri symptoms. For years I added Zoloft, to Effexor for just 2 weeks out of the month. The jitters should level. I tried 10mg of Prozac recently, felt relief for a week, then the misery returned.

I've been worse!!!!!:cool: I just want "the cure," as I could be the perimeno poster woman. I never had much patience for feeling premenstrual, so feeling that way most of the time is exhausting. Well, hopefully that crying jag is the last for the day. As my husband said, "You should stop wearing mascara until this is over." I end up sobbing it onto my pillow case. I could try waterproof.:mad::mad:

My anxiety level has reached a new high after reading some posts regarding AD use in the Google discussion groups! Was recently prescribed an increase in my Effexor dosage and thought I would read something reassuring. Anyone ever been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and, if so, I am sure the condition must worsen during menopause. Age has not brought wisdom, in my case, but increased worry. Thanks for any advice.

If read that many women in their forties are misdiagnosed with Bipolar during perimenopause. I thought perhaps I was Bipolar, but after 4 mood stabilizers making me so depressed I couldn't get out of bed, I've decided to save any diagnosis until the hormones level. Shoot, I've asked myself could I be Bipolar often. I did have a hypomanic reaction to one antidepressant. If that feeling could be bottled. Intense anxiety can be within the bipolar spectrum, but the hormones surely complicated any diagnosis at this juncture.

Oh, mood and anxiety disorders will worsen during menopause, no doubt about that.

What's the Effexor dosage, joools?? I took 225mg for a long time, with the Zolofts premenstrually. At time I took 250 mg of Zoloft before my period. Now I take 150mg of Effexor, plus just added 35mg of nortrityline. I've tried the arsenal finding that the hormones are more powerful than the AD.

I do speaka de Englesh, pardon typos.

I am not totally convinced that I suffer bipolar disorder, although my mother did. I did have good results with six months of taking Effexor 75mg/once daily and a low dose of Lamictal. But, then the depression/anxiety reared its ugly head again. I read with interest and amusement an earlier post by you (Chris) in reference to Virginia Wolfe. Do you suppose she was unipolar or bipolar? Not that it matters, of course. Just curious. I do wonder if short term memory loss can be attributed to menopause or specifically mediation, as indicated in those horrible Google discussion groups.

Please excuse my typos as well. I just noticed that in my last post that I used "mediation" rather than "medication". Perhaps some sort of Freudian slip. I probably need more "medication"!

Panic and anxiety is the mood disorder family. When I started this peri roller coaster at 38, I had a psych try to convince me that I was bi-polar and she wanted to put me on depakote. NOT I think the peri stuff exarbates (sp?)the panic and anxiety symptoms. If the doctors can't see hormonal shifts on a blood test they're apt to make us believe it's all in our head!

The scary part is I found psychiatrists to be among the most understanding regarding the effects of hormones on the mind. Shoot, my shrink's practice is full of peri women. My last shrink was rather old. I went in their panicked after not seeing him for months. He looked at me perplexed, stating, "Could it be perimenopause." Jeez, mood swings, anxiety, panic, insomnia, rage, depression. BP disorder and peri share lots of symptoms. Virginia Wolff was Bipolar, I believe. She seemed on a manic high when she wrote Mrs. Dalloway. God, that Wolff post. That was a rough night. I got my period a few days later.

Oh, regarding the memory loss. It's most likely peri, or could it be the Effexor????? Well, I ain't messin' with nothing, as I said, it's been worse. Maybe increasing the Effexor by 37.5 mg. would be an option, as I believe they come in this strength. I wouldn't go with too large an increase, knowing what I know now.

Thanks Chris. I did increase dosage by another 37.5 last week on advice of my pdoc. After feeling even more anxious, I increased another 37.5, for a total 150mg/daily. Seems like I feel even more anxious. Can even a small increase cause this? Do you mind if I ask why, after knowing what you now know, not to increase more? Funny, when I first read and saw "The Hours" I felt very stable. I believe it would terrify me now.

Oh, just because I know AD can stop working is why I suggest taking a low dose. I think the hormones can be more powerful than the drugs, as well. If you just increased it that could cause some anxiety. Reading horror stories about the medication will also cause anxiety.

Anxiety and depression do share the same gene and often accompany each other. It is possible to have either one, or the other seperately however. I have a shrink bible.

I LOVED the book The Hours. It was better than Mrs Dalloway, which I only read three quarters of. My son had to read The Hours for a college english class, so he thought I'd like it. Now, I read magazines, short stories, or the paper. I can't focus as well as I could when the I'd read The Hours. This meno ride s*cks, huh.

Yes, the meno ride s*cks, however, I wonder if I use it as an excuse for not solving problems as I once did. Hard for me to separate menopause effects from possible chemical imbalance or just plain nuts!! In spite of physical symptoms of menopause, I once thought I could handle anything that came my way. I resent the hell out of having to take any sort of medication to get me through. I do trust my pdoc, although I believe I could benefit from a truly knowledgeable therapist, those being in short supply where I live. I am becoming sort of a kinder, gentler person, which I attribute to the medication. Feels like I am losing my own identity!! My husband tells me I will never be satisfied!

Joools.... It's the "unsatisfied" women who will take over the world... and run it right! Keep the faith, Susan

Matoaka - thanks for the affirmation. I suspect I need to once again be in control of my own life. I do not feel the need to control anyone else's, but I would like to be less selfish, more patient and sympathetic with others, less cynical and somehow bring some serenity into my life. I am afraid these are confliciting ideas and, as usual, I am not able to accept any gray areas. Thanks again. What you have so succinctly written has eased some of the doubt.

My husband has called me a malcontent before. Perhaps. I started therapy and I'm already finding the relaxation tape helpful for falling asleep. It seems I have a totally different hormonal picture, as I've suffered from progressively worsening PMS through my thirties and forties. I melted down three years ago, when peri hit. I think a monkey could do a psychiatrist's job. It ain't rocket science, but mainly trial and error. I feel a bit premenstrual and persnickety today. Hang in joools.

thanks chris. my father and several male employers have labeled me as a "rebel without a cause." in trying to accept being older, complacent, less volatile, ad nauseum, i have come to have many self-doubts, which is, indeed, making me crazy. i guess i don't really want to become an old, friend-less crone, as my husband so helpfully predicts (if i don't change my behaviour) but that prospect didn't seem so horrible before the symptoms began, at least two years ago. it took a long time for me to become self-reliant and i had forgotten how hard it is to become "vulnerable" again. do you suppose one can, however, overcome cynicism? (is this a word?)

Yup, cynicism is a word. Until your husband walks a mile in your meno moccasins tell him to stop projecting. I have a cynical streak, as well. This is a turbulent time of life when we start to examine everything. I was getting anaylisis paralysis for awhile, from examining every last detail of my life. Today I will try to live in the moment. How old are you joools??? There aren't any half way decent therapists who can provide a support network through this bumpy ride. I've had some TOXIC therapists, who only made things worse. I am also ultra sensitive, so..........

analysis, pay attention Chris.;)

Vulnerability is hard. I've been there all my life, but at least I'm not dead emotionally.

Chris - i am 54, too old for this type of rebellious behaviour. i do not want to conform, nor have i ever wanted to conform. however, in spite of the fact that i basically joined this site out of curiosity, with no expectations, i have picked up some useful and helpful information. i feel better and stronger today. if i were as articulate as you, i would be submitting my thoughts to publishers. it is very nice to communicate with intelligent women. with all due respect, is anyone here from the "confederate states?" i am, and making no excuses nor casting aspersions. it just seems that in scanning the posts, i haven't noticed anyone being from the deep south. not that it matters of course!!!!

You are so sweet. Nope, I'm not from the south. I'm glad you feel better. Feel free to U2U me anytime you need support. Gosh, 54, you are too old for this BS. It'll get better!!

Joools, Southerners are friendly, which is more than I can say for my fellow Nutmeggers. (Ct.) There are many articulate, bright women, including yourself on P.S. Off to the dentist, again. It seems I live there these days. Everything is falling apart. lol

Aimee: i was given a copy of Suzanne Somer's book on my last birthday! i read it with interest until i was told that she had, after all, undergone exensive "landscaping." i felt like i had been taken for a ride and did not finish it. at the risk of sounding like "inquiring minds want to know" do you suppose she actually did have plastic surgery? i wanted to believe that she looked great because of the bio-identical hormones. i, too, love oscar wilde. my favorite quote is "work is the curse of the drinking class".