I am 57 and have had symptoms come and go. Now at this stage I feel very fatigued, have chills, night sweats. Is this still suppose to be going on. Will the fatigue go away? thanks Elizabeth

hi kwiat, well, this is what is happening to me, I'm 4 years post 45 and going through hell. The fatigue is almost unbearable and the symptoms dont' or haven't eased up in while. All I can say is hang in there, hugs Moozie

Hi Kwiat, I am the same as you and Moozie, I haven't had a period for 19 months, still get very tired, joint aches and pains, quite bad night sweats and hot flushes during the day. All mine come in cycles together, so hang on in there its sure to pass!!!! eventually. Luv Jenniffer

I've had chills, night sweats and fatigue too. Some days are worse than others. Also still get scalp ingling and lightheadedness at times. This was at its worst when I was 57 to 59 years old. I'm 61 now and still get it some days.

I still get terrible anxiety even though I have been without a period for about 2 years now. Anyone else still getting the anxiety and panic things? I found this to be my biggest problem all thorugh peri and now post.

Yes Bingo, Post has been very bad for me as far as anxiety and panic is concerned. Never went through this in peri at all. Hugs to you, Moozie

I have to say that post is better than peri for me. (Knock on wood). I hope I don't jinx myself. I haven't had a period for 13 months so I guess I am official. My three years of peri were awful. Panic, anxiety and dizziness like you wouldn't believe. That all seems to have eased off now. I never had hot flashes nor do I now, but maybe they are yet to come. I still have trouble believing that I am at this point in my life. I think because I still have children at home and am involved in all sorts of things at their schools, I'm still busy being "soccer mom". I don't perceive myself as a crone. Maybe I have a Peter Pan complex. Have a great day ladies. I love all of you.

Thanks for your post. It was very encouraging. I wonder if the people who have lots of flashes don't experience the panic/anxiety, and vice versa. I've never had a lot of hot flashes, but certainly have the anxiety and the other symptoms. Really weird.

Mine rotate and take turns and sometimes all 34 attack at once! ~ But post is proving to be a better ride than perri.

Hi everyone, I find my symptoms rotate like yours Jimi, I still get hot flushes by the bucketful, night sweats and occasional anxiety mostly when I feel like life is running away with me, then I need to stop, sit down and take stock, breathe properly and let every muscle sag this usually helps. It's funny because I usually get the fatigue the same time very day, about 4 - 5 pm and it's then that I need to eat a snack. Luv Jenniffer

Hi Kwiat: I am also 57and have been post 6 years. The anxiety is worse than peri,with very few good days. When does it end,who knows, thank goodness for the posts and lots of other ladies going through the same thing. We will all make it!

I'm about one year post (with menopause defined as being the date of first missed period). I have had some very faint spotting which would reset the clock except that this spotting was so faint that I've decided not to count it. So TA DA... I am postmenopausal. I guess I need a hormone check to back that up. Also I have not taken hormone therapy. I believe doing that also causes a clock reset. How do I feel? I still struggle with some of my symptoms, however I am so much better off than I was in the last year. I know it is controversial to say so but I've read that most women feel better two (or was it five) years after menopause than they did before they started perimenopause. I read that in Prevention Magazine. The thought of having continuing severe anxiety years after menopause is scary. Is that because it was there before perimenopause as well, a life long affliction? Could our nervous systems get traumatized by meno? Would sitting on the beach drinking beer for a long vacation help?

Hi Beth I am also 13 months without a period so I guess I am now official. Peri was the pits! I had never suffered an anxious day in my life, (except when something bad happened to family or friends). Peri threw me for a loop. Out of the blue and for no apparent reason, I would get terrible attacks of anxiety. It took me forever to connect it to perimenopause. I thought there was something terribly wrong with me. Thank goodness for these boards. I credit everyone here for getting me through it. I still get anxious now and then, but nothing like the past 3 horrible years. I hope it gets better for you soon. I'm not much of a beer drinker, but definitely a beach person. So take a six pack, a lounge chair a good book and go for it girl! Have a great day. Donna

I have posted this before, but I will post it again ~ I am almost 2 years post and am not on any form of HRT. My interpretation of hot flushes and night sweats is that they cleanse our bodies of toxins and flush em out through the skin ~ largest organ, so I don't think it's a good idea to stop them happening. If I have a night sweat these days, I wake up thinking GREAT! ~ what a clever little body ~ cleanse away And I am definately feeling a lot better now than I have for the past 8 years. The only thing I take is small dose zoloft - 25mg each evening and I am happy with that for the moment. I found that ALL forms of HRT - natural or otherwise caused more problems than they were worth ~ such as liver and gallbladder problems, anxiety, depression, arthritis, carpal tunnel syndrome etc. I have been feeling better since I stopped using them and stopped worrying about all these symptoms that I thought were gonna be the death of me! One thing I DO know, is that you gotta be yourself and tell everyone else to bugger off if they are hindering and not helping And back to basics and nature is definately the way to go.....DECLUTTER your life and let the energy flow~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks so much for these encouraging posts! Some of us are at times hanging on by a thread, and the thought of a future without these awful symptoms is what keeps us going... You are angels!

hello ladies of the menapause world! i have been in perimenapause for about 2 years now and at 45 have seemingly begun to taper off. today is day 56 and i am scheduled for some blood test for day 60 to check on hormone levels etc. i was taking prometirum 100mg on day 10-22 the past 9 months and it seemed to help for last years season...anyway the thing is one symptom i seem to have alot and have had for this whole 2 years is a nausea feeling almost constantly...is that something anyone else has? my doctor is great dr. laura corio and she seems to feel it is not menapause related...but i can't seem to figure out what else it could be...any ideas or experiences to share would be greatly appreciated. this is my first post but not my first visit to pwer surge. i remember when i found this web site i felt like "finally a place i can relate!' it has been a tough few years in this regard with all the mood swings, crazy cycles, rage, hot flashes , nightmares, headaches and yes i too go to the beach for long walks whenever possible! good to meet you all! thanks for hearing me! hugs to you all. kbear

Hey kbear! WELCOME

Hi KBear... try Ginger Tea to tame peri-menopausal nausea. Other women here report this symptom and I have had it too (although of course I don't know what causes your nausea). I like making ginger tea from fresh ginger root. Also since pregnant women suffer nausea (probably from hormonal shifts) it seems reasonable to me that nausea would be a feature of perimenopause when women are again going through hormonal shifts. Also (for me) the nausea feels very similiar to the feeling of morning sickness.

Thanks for this post, I was a bit confused myself because I had already experience hot flashes, chills ect. two years ago and thought that when it all finished I was done. And then two months ago it all started up again. Hugs to you all!

...........off the zoloft too now ......on the ginger and lemon tea.

You ROCK jimibugs!! GOOD FOR YOU!! You've come a long way, BABY!! It is such a pleasure to see the in your posts these days. You should be very proud of yourself for totally taking charge of your life and stepping OUT OF THE BOX! You did it, my friend. I am THRILLED, PROUD, and HAPPY to be your friend. YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!

Ya'll ,I am having a hard time deciding whether I am peri or menopausal. I haven't been to the dr but I've only had one LIGHT spotting since Christmas & that was this past Feb.. Christmas was my last real period. Can somebody tell me how far along I am in this thing ? I would really love to know !

Sounds like peri, Dixie. You're not considered menopausal (aka POSTmeno) until after 12 full months with no periods. Sorry about that - but welcome to Power Surge! You've found a fantastic place to get you through the rest of your peri and beyond.

Hi Ladies, well it's been awhile since I posted, not that I don't come to read now and then, but my mother is very sick and I am caregiver to her, for the last 6 months so have been busy. But I have said this before on these boards and here I go again, but how do people like myself who had a partial hysterectomy about 15 yrs. ago figure out what stage they are in. I still had an ovary left so didn't go directly to menopause, and was not on any HRT for a number of years then suddenly the symptoms started a little at a time. I first noticed them about 7 years ago, the hot flashes, the headaches, the anxiety so my doctor put me on ERT. and I have had many symptoms ever since, at what point would I be considered peri and then post... you know what I mean, I can't judge by not having a period for 12 months. I just assume I am postmenopausal, but really how was I to deal with the symptoms way back not having any indicators....Whoa is me, anyway the symptoms are subsiding, but not alltogether, the worst is the tingling and weird feelings on my left side, the crawling feeling along side my face and head is annoying, I am 55yrs. old and from what I can gather by other posts it might just go on indefinitely, so I guess it is just grin and bear:P I tried to figure this all out and just gave in and let nature do its thing, what works for one person doesn't do a thing for another, I know tried lots of remedies only time is a sure thing. Well that is my opinion anyway..

Thanks, MaryO, I think....;o) I wanna be postmeno SO BAD !! Altho, I am taking these New Phase pills now (they're herbal) and the hot flashes are NOWHERE NEAR what they were 3 weeks ago.

Were any of you ladies on HRT? Everyone who has an opinion on my anx and angriness think HRT is the magic cure-all, even though I don't want to take it. However anxiety is spoiling my life. I don't want to be like this for too long! Neither do I want to resort to meds to be able to go out and about other than just the rare 'good days'.

I don't want to be on HRT and if I can avoid it,I'm going to. I'm taking Phase One,right now on the recommendation of a nother friend who's also going thru peri. You can buy it at Walmart and it has made a WORLD of difference in my symptoms,both physical and emotinal. I'm not saying it'll work for everyone but it's worked for more than just me. )

alice3, I would say my worst symptom of peri has been anxiety and I have found that Revival soy has helped me so much. I didn't think it was working at first (took about 3 months for me to notice less anxiety) but I stuck with it and today I feel almost back to normal - still would like my libido back (working on that - started bioidentical testosterone 5 weeks ago - so far - not much

Have you mentioned these to the doctor? Yes, lots of things can be menopause; but sometimes it can be a different medical problem. Just wanted to make sure you have eliminated other things! Zelma

I've done well on Estrace pills and testosterone cream. It really helped my anxiety as well as other symptoms when I got the ERT worked out! I can't take progesterone though - even the natural kind depresses me. Since I don't have an uterus, I don't have to though. And the testosterone cream has done wonders for my libido! I got the cream through Power Surge's pharmacist., Pete, with my Dr.'s prescription.

Hope this helps!

Zelma

Hi, it's been a while since I have been on the board, but nice to check in and touch base. I am post-menopause, I'm 55 yrs old, and the severe symptoms I had since I was in pre & peri-menopause (began at 46) are passed now. I have some new symptoms with occasional sweating, if I eat a high-carb meal for sure! I have to say a loud "Amen" to most of those symptoms: from beginning with eratic mood swings (full blown depression with anxiety like never before) began at 46 years, went into severe hot flashes, and cold sweats, insomnia, panic attacks, for 6 years (47yrs - 53 yrs old). I was not able to work & had to go in-hospital for medications to get depression & anxiety stabilized (took 3 years). Many of the meds had side effects worse than the raw depression/anxiety!! I have come out of the hurricane now fairly stabilized very few hot flashes, sleep very well (thanks to Effexor and Seroquel), have better energy -- but unfortunately I live with deg. arthritis, systemic in all parts of my body, spine, hips, hands (past 4 years have been with two major surgerys - hand, basal joint and carpal tunnel reconstruction) and surprise right hip (total hip replacement)! I can't keep cartilage in my system. DDD (Degenerative Disc Disease) is rampant in my spine, close to surgery for L-4,5 going into severe degeneration. I wish my story could be more upbeat and happy, but I have had to live with chronic arthritic & nerve pain (neuropathy) for past 10 years. But I am forging through, with alot of pain medication and rest -- my mind is clear, no anxieties/panic attacks taking over even in the worse pain episodes with my arthritis. I am sleeping wonderfully and glad I have the worse behind me now.

jmbutterfly8, Thanks so much for that. What's most striking is your comment that although you're living with terrible physical pain, the crushing anxiety of perimenopause isn't there. This is so encouraging! I had a terrible depressive episode in April, and am now stabilized with Lexapro. I've been fearing how I might handle things in the future - will every loss bring the depression back? You've encouraged me to believe I might be able to handle whatever comes. I'm so sorry you're dealing with these awful things, and pray that there are approaches/medications to get you out of pain. Research is always going on, and I remain hopeful that many of today's medical problems will one day have quick cures. Bless you! Jacquie

jmbutterly, I pray your symptoms ease and your arthritis goes into remission...my mom had severe arthritis so I've seen what it can do. Do take care of yourself! Zelma

Please help me. Does anyone have white chin hairs since they entered menopause? I have one or two every month that I pluck, I find them disgusting. Is there anything to get rid of them for good?

Yep, I think it comes with the territory! Ain't meno grand?? I have dreams that I'm totally incompacitated and my husband brings me tweezers instead of flowers! If you're tired of tweezing, I'd call a dermatologist... she'd have other options for you. Keep the faith, Susan

Dunnie, I had a white EYELASH! I noticed it because something was in my line of vision. I looked in the mirror and saw it! I was so disgusted I pulled out a whole bunch and it was still there, so I tweezed it and pulled even more black ones out. I thought I was rid of it then, but IT CAME BACK! Once again, I pulled out too many trying to get it. But this time, it has not come back (yet).

Hey CSugarGrove: So we ALL want to know: Do you have ANY eyelashes left now?? I may have to relinquish my role as President of the Pluckers Club. You have really outdone me!! Otter :cool:

Otter, yes, they grew back, but no more white ones so far. The darn white ones don't curl up at all, and stick straight down, so you see this little white blur all the time. That's how I found it. I was telling my friend about it, and she got bitchy and said, "Well, I wear so much mascara that I wouldn't notice white eyelashes anyhow." Meow.......

Hi there... I've been reading many posts in the post menopause forum. It seems like anxiety and panic attacks are large around here as well as arthritis, depression, and just getting through each day with pain. But this forum is the only one I have found on post menopause where the moderators don't go nuts with deleting or afraid of sensitive topics. This is wonderful!! It is comforting to find many post menopausal women of my own age going through the same tough issues. I had a hell of a perimenopause. Since the whole menopause process is now documented to be ten to thirteen years I know when exactly I entered the perimenopausal phase and that was around 39. Fatigue, severe exhaustion was the worst for me. Any stress of any kind made me exhausted and this lasted throughout the following 14 years until I had my last period July 2001. I am 56 now and post menopause is much better but there are still problems which I can now handle when in peri I just couldn't. The worst for me has been the Depression and anxiety attacks. Oh yeah, the sleep pattern is all screwed up. Sometimes I can sleep for days and then the insomnia works its deprivation on my nerves. I found that every tiny problem no matter if it is physical, mental, emotional is exacerbated by the whole menopause process. And yet, all those years gave me time (aka the pause) to reinvent myself or rather get to know who I really am as a human being, not just a female. Perimenopause put me through hell but through it I learned so much about life. I had to slow down, no, I was forced to slow down. I couldn't handle stress even if I perceived something to be stressful I would fall apart. I had a full breakdown when I was 45 and it took years to climb out of it. I am still in recovery and believe I will have to manage my mental health for the rest of my life. If it hadn't had been for perimenopause and all of the trials it put me through I would probably had died of a heart attack or stress related disease. I was on the fast track of a artist in a challenging and competitive field and I had to keep-up with the latest and greatest in order to make a living all the time. But that all came to a screeching halt for me when I was diagnosed with progressive hearing loss and the loss of my lifelong career as a result. Anyway, what can I say? Perimenopause does have benefits alongwith all the pain and frightening new things that keep popping up during it all. Reflecting back upon all those years of sleeping, depression, despair, ugliness, isolation, loss, emotional fragility, and dysfunction and weight gain, I learned that all women who survive the menopause process come out better people, wiser, more beautiful than they ever were...and that I am one of them. Many women in the menopause stage commit suicide in large numbers. But this fact is not broadcast like elder and teen suicide. Why? well, maybe it's because menopause is still half in the closet in our patriarchal cultures. I try to talk about menopause whenever I see there is a reason for mention. I love to watch other's reactions to this word and especially to post menopause. There is a blindness which comes over a person's whole demeanor, a blindness of 'we don't want to go there'. It is still so uncomfortable for people to even just consider for one moment. I think it's about aging and that scares us. But talking about it seems to open people up a little more even through their blindness. Hmmmmm Well, now I'm two plus years in post, feeling much better, but there are new things happening all the time still....mostly physically now. I am finding my arthritis is candida (yeast) related as well as a result of heavy weight gain. The loss of estrogen in post menopause really makes the arthritis worsen. Not enough estrogen to keep the joints lubricated. I can only stand up for about two hours a day now and walking is pretty difficult, so my shopping hobby has lightened up alot....do miss the shopping and somehow on-line shopping isn't the same is it? I guess what I am trying to say is that post menopause so far is much better than perimenopause, thank all the gods for this! But that doesn't mean I'm home free as I am learning from the many posts I've been reading here. One of my cousins who is 60 is still having periods, still in perimenopause I guess. She recently had to have a hysterectomy due to a fibroid which was ignored for too long. She's kind of in denial about the whole process. She says that she feels so much better now after the operation and can't for the periods to stop. HA! That's all for now....thanks to all who are posting about menopause, it is helping me so much.... fatdanser

Hi fatdanser, I was dismayed to read that many women in menopause commit suicide. This is terrible and I did not know about it. I wonder if they are completely through the transition, or still getting through it. You're right on target about the "blindness" in other people when we mention menopause in public conversation. Because of this wonderful website and all of my meno sisters guiding me through the insanity, I have developed a very open attitude and I got used to openly discussing everything about it without any shame. But I've been hit with the very same closed reaction in my daily life, even in other women who I know must be dealing it. Bring up meno insomnia or any of the other 33 symptoms, and the room clears out. I can come to PowerSurge and ask any question in my head, and I get intelligent and thoughtful replies that are enlightening, not to mention solving whatever problem I have. The most healing thing is that no matter what has ailed me, from dry mouth to panic attacks to relationship issues, someone out there always says, "I've been through that, too." I can't think of anything more comforting than this. Last spring my weight had climbed to probably over 200, and I'm only 5'4" tall. I didn't weigh myself, but started Weight Watchers, expecting to have problems losing weight now that I'm middle-aged. Seven months later, I've dropped from women's size 22 to size 12. So I guess the myth that we have to be overweight in middle-age is not always true. I didn't notice that I lost any slower now than when I was young, although I still have a fat roll on my stomach that I can't seem to burn off. I think that's because stomach fat provides a low level of estrogen, while fat in other places does not. So the body does not want to burn this off....another gem of wisdom I learned here. Otherwise, I feel great now. I had probably 33 of the 34 meno symptoms a few years ago, but they have all tapered off and gone away. I still run into difficult periods, when I'll get a few symptoms. But they go away, and life goes on. So there is life after meno. I only wish I could have told that to some of the women who committed suicide, if they did it because they felt so bad and had lost hope.

A woman in perimenopause is three times more likely to be depressed than at any other stage in her life. As a psychiatrist told my sister, "I've had to hospitalize women in peri." Woman are also more likely to be hospitalized or commit suicide before their periods. I'm slender with arthritis, which is genetic and caused by using my hands extensively all my life. Don't even get me started on my back. I don't expect these problems to abate in post, but I swear oscillating hormones diminish my natural endorphins. I've also had women open up when I'd mentioned the subject, nodding in agreement to the symptoms. Oh, I do think people are in denial about aging. I never had a very good sense of denial. My husband establishes rapport, in sales, by bringing up my meno with middle aged ladies, and then asking about their experience. Hey, whatever works. Good luck on the diets. Actually, my sister found it easier to lose pounds in post when the hormonal cravings disipated. I'm glad you post ladies feel better!

OOh Slinky! CSugargrove! Talking of talking of menopause, I started talking about it to my much younger sister in law. I glanced at DH and noticed that uncomfortable look as if to say "Why are you dragging this up now?" I'll suffer in silence then!

I'd say "TOO BAD" to the dh, alice. If I want to talk about anything to do with meno to my husband, he has learned that it's easier to shut up and supposedly "listen" to me for a few minutes. Well, so what, I took care of him while he had knee surgery and I gave him medicine and waited on him. He can listen to me if I want to talk about meno symptoms. Chris, my hat is off to you. I've never, NEVER been slender in my life, and I won't be, either. I love to eat everything and I've always had a weight problem, even as a child. I can't understand slender people, but I do admire them. :wink:

Hi again, I just want to mention a fact I learned from my electrolysist years ago....DON'T PLUCK! shaving is better. Reason: when we pluck the root follicle twists or get crooked for some reason. When the electrolysist tries to zap the root it is harder to do and so you will have to have much more work done, a longer period of healing, and higher cost. Shaving or cutting with scissors doesn't affect the root and is easy for the electrolysist to penetrate and zap. I need to clarify a statement I made about my cousin who is finished with menopause now due to a hysterectomy. I mistyped my last sentence in my recent post because I was thinking one thing instead of what I was really saying....HA! I meant to write that she is very glad that her periods are over. Oh well.... Yes, suicide is prevalent in the whole process of suicide from my readings I have found. Through my own experience of wanting to end it all I can totally agree. What is interesting is that more women try to commit suicide but it is men who succeed. And men are more likely to use a pistol or weapon of some sort to do the job whereas women prefer sleeping pills and drugs. Again I can see this. I am what the psychiatric field labels a Major Depressive, recurring, atypical with ideations of suicide. My "ideations" now that I am in post only happen now when I eat too much sugar and simultaneously can't sleep due to the insomnia of post. When this happens I will use sleeping aids and because of the arthritis I will use IBprofen. So this combination of SUGAR, IB, SLEEPAIDS, and INSOMNIA becomes a lethal dose of chemical disorder in my emotional centers of my brain (amygdala) and I can't help but see life as hopeless and my part in it worthless and so I begin my plot to do the deed. I know now when I get to this point to pop a few more Effexor XR than usual and soon I am able to think rationally and stop the sugar especially. Sleep eventually follows from shear emotional exhaustion and I am renewed and always marvel at how I could ever get down so far. "Depression is a wimp of a word", William Styron writes in his reputable Memoir of Madness, Darkness Visible. YES! Melancholia fits better but it still doesn't sum up all the agony and feelings of a life voided out, burnt out, guts spilled out leaving dried blood everywhere. I could write a book on Depression from what I have gone through in perimenopause but the one thing which is clear is that I had a propensity for severe Depression from a young age...mainly adolescence. Sugar was my drug and my best friend, my only life's pleasure and the mainstay of my diet. Amazingly I am not a diabetic..yet. Lastly, to the Husband who cringes at the subject of menopause: get over it! Menopause happens and if it wasn't for women having ovaries and the whole menses process, he wouldn't be here! It is in his benefit to learn about his female partner's physical changes. Too many women suffer in silence because they are afraid of the people who put menopause down which most assuredly invalidates the whole being of woman. Have we women become so accumstomed to being put down that we are satisfied to let our men living in arrogant ignorance? Is it better to keep our men uninformed and why would that be? The more we inform others in our close environments the better it is for them and you. No matter that they poo-poo the subject; that should not stop a woman from expressing the changes she is experiencing and in fact when others do poo-poo the subject then this is a grand opportunity to educate and open up a line of positive communication. Facts and statistics work wonders on men. Tell your husband that there are more women today going through menopause than ever before in the history of human kind. Make sure you can back up that fact too which is easily done by going to the internet. Then tell him that this fact will affect market costs because companies see numbers rise in this age group and so their products are going to be targeting the menopause group more than others today. (he might argue that fact, but he will begin to notice this truth when he watches TV or reads a magazine or hears others talk about their wives, girlfriends, or whatever he will have an open window in his thinking now). Also, because such a large population is going through menopause---- tell him how long it takes for menopause to happen (10-13 years and that's only what the medical professional has documented so this is not set in stone and could be more actually) because this large group is physically and psychically evolving everything is going to subtly be rerouted, just as a river gently shifts the land around it and manuevers itself into a new direction slowly and deliberately, menopausal women will be making large changes in global attitudes about absolutely everything in our human worlds. Get the statistics from websites on menopause, print them out and hand them to him. Make it fun, cut out facts and stick them under a cookie, on his shaving mirror, on the refrigerator under his favorite magnet, on the review mirror of his car. Men think in linear terms, logic fact beginning and endings competition right and wrong. So approaching the subject of menopause in his terms will positively help you more than you can imagine. Men are children in this area of female reproduction facts and it scares them. Instead of helping him turn off his light switch, help him turn it on and then watch the good that happens and how you and all women benefit just from one man's gaining more knowledge about women. We are the teachers of this time and we women need to be confident in our right of passage and can do so much good right now through informing and letting our loved ones see what we are going through. Fatdanser

Hi again,
I just want to mention a fact I learned from my electrolysist years ago....DON'T PLUCK! shaving is better. Reason: when we pluck the root follicle twists or get crooked for some reason. When the electrolysist tries to zap the root it is harder to do and so you will have to have much more work done, a longer period of healing, and higher cost. Shaving or cutting with scissors doesn't affect the root and is easy for the electrolysist to penetrate and zap.

I need to clarify a statement I made about my cousin who is finished with menopause now due to a hysterectomy. I mistyped my last sentence in my recent post because I was thinking one thing instead of what I was really saying....HA! I meant to write that she is very glad that her periods are over. Oh well....

Yes, suicide is prevalent in the whole process of suicide from my readings I have found. Through my own experience of wanting to end it all I can totally agree. What is interesting is that more women try to commit suicide but it is men who succeed. And men are more likely to use a pistol or weapon of some sort to do the job whereas women prefer sleeping pills and drugs. Again I can see this. I am what the psychiatric field labels a Major Depressive, recurring, atypical with ideations of suicide. My "ideations" now that I am in post only happen now when I eat too much sugar and simultaneously can't sleep due to the insomnia of post. When this happens I will use sleeping aids and because of the arthritis I will use IBprofen. So this combination of SUGAR, IB, SLEEPAIDS, and INSOMNIA becomes a lethal dose of chemical disorder in my emotional centers of my brain (amygdala) and I can't help but see life as hopeless and my part in it worthless and so I begin my plot to do the deed. I know now when I get to this point to pop a few more Effexor XR than usual and soon I am able to think rationally and stop the sugar especially. Sleep eventually follows from shear emotional exhaustion and I am renewed and always marvel at how I could ever get down so far.

"Depression is a wimp of a word", William Styron writes in his reputable Memoir of Madness, Darkness Visible. YES! Melancholia fits better but it still doesn't sum up all the agony and feelings of a life voided out, burnt out, guts spilled out leaving dried blood everywhere. I could write a book on Depression from what I have gone through in perimenopause but the one thing which is clear is that I had a propensity for severe Depression from a young age...mainly adolescence. Sugar was my drug and my best friend, my only life's pleasure and the mainstay of my diet. Amazingly I am not a diabetic..yet.

Lastly, to the Husband who cringes at the subject of menopause: get over it! Menopause happens and if it wasn't for women having ovaries and the whole menses process, he wouldn't be here! It is in his benefit to learn about his female partner's physical changes. Too many women suffer in silence because they are afraid of the people who put menopause down which most assuredly invalidates the whole being of woman. Have we women become so accumstomed to being put down that we are satisfied to let our men living in arrogant ignorance? Is it better to keep our men uninformed and why would that be?

The more we inform others in our close environments the better it is for them and you. No matter that they poo-poo the subject; that should not stop a woman from expressing the changes she is experiencing and in fact when others do poo-poo the subject then this is a grand opportunity to educate and open up a line of positive communication.

Facts and statistics work wonders on men. Tell your husband that there are more women today going through menopause than ever before in the history of human kind. Make sure you can back up that fact too which is easily done by going to the internet. Then tell him that this fact will affect market costs because companies see numbers rise in this age group and so their products are going to be targeting the menopause group more than others today. (he might argue that fact, but he will begin to notice this truth when he watches TV or reads a magazine or hears others talk about their wives, girlfriends, or whatever he will have an open window in his thinking now). Also, because such a large population is going through menopause---- tell him how long it takes for menopause to happen (10-13 years and that's only what the medical professional has documented so this is not set in stone and could be more actually) because this large group is physically and psychically evolving everything is going to subtly be rerouted, just as a river gently shifts the land around it and manuevers itself into a new direction slowly and deliberately, menopausal women will be making large changes in global attitudes about absolutely everything in our human worlds. Get the statistics from websites on menopause, print them out and hand them to him. Make it fun, cut out facts and stick them under a cookie, on his shaving mirror, on the refrigerator under his favorite magnet, on the review mirror of his car. Men think in linear terms, logic fact beginning and endings competition right and wrong. So approaching the subject of menopause in his terms will positively help you more than you can imagine. Men are children in this area of female reproduction facts and it scares them. Instead of helping him turn off his light switch, help him turn it on and then watch the good that happens and how you and all women benefit just from one man's gaining more knowledge about women.

We are the teachers of this time and we women need to be confident in our right of passage and can do so much good right now through informing and letting our loved ones see what we are going through.

Fatdanser

(I may have mistakenly hit the send button twice--a bad typing habit, NOT a post menopause symptom!).

I went off Estratest about 6 months ago because of all the negative press, etc. This was the second time I went off, the first time the hot flashes returned with such a vengeance that I just couldn't see living in such heat hell. This time, much to my surprise...no hot flashes (and I had my last period several years ago). So, I thought, hmmm this is great, I don't need anything (I'm 55 and started menopause at 51). Well, I've noticed that my lifelong tendency to depression and anxiety has seriously worsened over the past several months as has the sleeplessness. Since I'm still functioning well at work, when I discussed this with my psychiatrist (who just dispenses the anti-depressant drugs), he didn't seem to think there was any reason for concern. When I went to a women's conference recently and we had to tell our "lifestory", I literally broke down and cried for an hour in front of 20 women. Not that this would be unlike me necessarily, but apparently my feelings of hopelessness, which I really hadn't shared much with anyone, surfaced with these very caring women and they urged me as a group to get some help. It's occurred to me since reading some of these posts and just some general vanity issues concerning hormone replacement and how it could positively effect my ongoing hair loss, that perhaps I'm not as symptom free as I had thought. Im going to do the saliva tests with Pete and see if I can start feeling better with some combination of NHRT.

"Darkness Visible," was a wonderful book. I guess literary success doesn't
innoculate one against depression.

Fatsdancer, You know your stuff.

There are some dangers in classifying hormonal occurences as mental disorders.
The psychiatrists are still arguing whether to classify PMDD as a mood disorder in the DSM 1V. Right now it's listed "under further study." A type of menopausal
depression was in the DSM III, but omitted from the DSM lV. Rather than
being patriarcal, I believe this is more of a feminist issue. Nevertheless, I
had every last symptom of PMDD, which makes for one miserable perimeno.
A previous history of depression or anxiety will also make this one rough ride.

Amen - fatdancer ............

I take my hat off to you and your determination and ENDURANCE. Your creativity shines out

Julie x

Ummmm, regarding men, my husbands saw a couple decades of worsening PMDD,
before peri hit. When hyperthyroidism and peri collided it was h e l l. Severe
panic and depression are not a pretty picture. Things have improved. Not nearly
enough for my impatient temperment, but I come up for air again.

I realize all cultures are different, but if I can't discuss what I feel with my husband
then I'm with the wrong man.

NOBODY LIVES IN IGNORANCE AROUND ME!!! LOL And nobody poo poos
the intensity of my symptoms.

I also thing menopause is a marker of aging, so women themselves deny it.

Also, some people don't realize the that each individual's experience is
different.

Oh, I'm getting premenstrual, so I don't belong in this postmeno section, yet.

Fatdancer, you've never had AD poop out. I take Effexor. Actually, I use to
take a stiff Zoloft adjunct premenstrually, but stopped. Also, since the
pharmaceutical companies can ditch data and depression has a high placebo
response rate, I wonder. I wonder lots. Wish I was the sort who could follow
blindly. Actually, since resuming the AD's the panic and OCD are better, but it's
FAR from a cure all.

Depression was referred to as the black bile, ages and ages ago. I'm glad
things have improved for you fatsdancer.

Hi everyone, I haven't been posting much for a while, bit still come to the boards regularily to see how everyone is doing and to get help, and remind myself that I am going to be okay and that everything I am still getting is normal. I haven't had a period for 21/2 years, I still get the crashing fatigue every month for 2/3 days where I just can,t get up, this usually follows a pariod of say a week where I wake up every morning at about 3 - 4 am and get totally exhausted. I get the terrible overwhelming sadness and crying at the same time as the fatigue, anything sets me off day or night. I also still get indigestion problems, hiatus hernia gerd related, these come in attacks that last for at least 4/5 days, nausea, pain, can't eat much and only vey plain food. I still get hot flushes in abundance but ony for two weeks out of the monthly cycle, the next two weeks I'm usually cold ie pre-period. The only thing I don't get as bad is the anxiety, this I get very mildly maybe for two days and it's always immediatley after when I would have had a period, and I know how to handle that now anyway. This is still a massive improvement on peri, wow I can't believe it, this is an improvement!!, yes it is.

I really hope that all the other post meno ladies are doing well, just wanted to say thanks for being here to all of you, when I can't sleep these boards are the first place I come to, such a comfort and dear friends.

Luv Jenniffer