I have been messing around with some type of anxiety since I was a kid, although I did not what it was then. As far as I was concerned I was just scared all the time.

Anyway, since I had my son in 1998 I have been having panic attacks and generalized anxiety. My doctors told me that anxiety is something we control in the mind. Well I have decided that that is a bunch of BS!!!!

I have been making note the last couple months of how I feel and act on any given day. Now when I have stressors like last week, my daughter left to Alaska, got married (I could not be there) and my son had surgery (which he came through with flying colors), I was anxious and out of sorts. I was expecting that.

But on days when I am not really stressed, I have noticed that I am still experiencing anxiety. For example, this morning my son and I were laughing and cutting up but all the while I am experiencing shakiness and dizzies. WTH!!!!!!!!

To further my belief that it is not entirely mental is that when I do not eat, sleep, or rest properly I feel anxious. Sometimes, I can do everything right (hahahaha) but you know what I mean and then suddenly, out of the blue, I am so anxious I just want to unzip my skin and run away screaming.

So really, is anxiety mental or physical? Is it both? I just want some anxwers!!! I am so tired of being anxious. I want to fix it. My therapist was able to get to the root of the anxiety (PTSD) but the instigator of this is dead!!! For Heaven's sake why didn't my PTSD and anxiety die with him? I do continue to have flashbacks although not as often now and when I hear on the news about things that happened to others similar to what I experience, it causes distress and flashbacks but truly it seems that it should have lessened over time.

Also I get pissy because my therapist said my disease and knowing the end result also causes stress and anxiety. Well duh!!! But other people have diseases and do not experience GAd or panic attacks, why me!!!!!

I am not looking for answers here ladies, just throwing out some thoughts, whining, and venting.

I hope everyone is having an awesome Sunday.
Hugs to you all,
Jeaninne

Dear Jeaninne
I read your Post carefully and have to agree that anxiety has been my 'unwelcome bedfellow' for a long time.True I have some stressful situations-as we all do-but even when all is relatively calm I suffer very high levels of anxiety.I have tried to flow with the anxiety and breathe deeply.It really does not help me a great deal and so will take a small dose of Xanax as needed.
I also know many people with chronic diseases and very stressful home circumstances but they manage to cope fairly well.I wish I could.
I honestly now believe that some of us have extremely sensitive brain wiring and Meds. can help if used wisely and when necessary.I have tried the talk Therapy but it made me more panicky and anxious being reminded of some horrific child hood events.
Wishing you some peace,my dear and better days ahead!
God Bless
Elizabeth

I join you in the anxiety club. Though I had a thyroid issue to hang my hat on, but the endo says no. So, it's back to anxiety! I have an appt on Tues with an anxiety specialist who treats with Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. I will let you know how it goes. At any rate, I agree, anxiety s*cks THE MOST. I feel like a total freak!

Count me in the club... I have horrible morning anxiety. I go to bed happy as a clam. WTF. I am going through some really bad heart ache as my 23 yr old daughter was just dx with stage 3 melanoma. She will have surgery 2 weeks to remove all the lympnodes in her groin. Then aggresive treatments of interferon daily for a month then 11 months of injections 3 times a week. She just had a baby 3 months ago and is afraid she will miss any mile stones her daughter will go through. Please pray for her.. I love all you guys. I couldn't get through some days without coming here.
(((((char)))))

Ok Char, you win. You have MAJOR REASON to be anxious. Now I feel like a total loser for having anxiety for no apparent reason. I am not a crier, but have become one lately. Hearing about your daughter surely has made me tear up. I am also not a prayer, but I will for her tonight. I cannot even image the stress or heatache that the two of you must be going through. I am thinking of you!!!

Hi Char:

Man, I am with mainemom, I am a lame o for even thinking I have trouble.

I am so sorry about your daughter and will keep you and her in my prayers!!!!

Hugs to you and her,
Jeaninne

This probably won't be a popular view, but I have no doubt that childhood abuse or childhood trama causes anxiety in later life. Often extreme anxiety. Of course there are other causes as well, but these days it seems that people don't want to look at the effect which parents have on their kids. People left with a legacy of fear and anxiety have to manage as best they can and I believe that it is possible to work through any underlying issues. But it's not easy and it doesn't always happen, which is very sad. I only hope that I can eventually free myself from my legacy of suffering. I hope that we all find better days

My dear 'Char'
I am praying for your beautiful daughter and God willing that she comes through this.
God Bless her and her baby girl.
I am so very sorry that this has happened.You have the full right to feel anxious.
Please let us know how your daughter progresses.
Prayers starting now.
We love you too ,honey
Elizabeth

Elizabeth..Thank you so much for the prayers. I'm so scared about the whole situation and if I'll be able to get a handle on all this. My anxiety is through the roof. Wendy is going for a pet scan today and surgery next week. She will be spending some time in the hospital and I'll be at her house watching the baby. We do have some family members that will help because there is no way I can do this by myself. I will keep everybody informed. And bless everyone for thinking of me....Char

Char - Just wanted to let you know my thoughts are with you and your family.

Also, Stitchnanny, I am with you on the "anxiety club"..it is hard, so hard. I have suffered from GAD for 22 years. I don't know what it even feels like to have a "normal" day. I have been on medication for that long also. But, not to be a total downer, I have periods where I feel good or "normal". I do agree that stress and general health do affect your anxiety levels. I feel now that I am premenopausal, my anxiety has step up a notch.

I am sorry you are going through a rough time right now...just wanted to send you a (((hug)))

Sunny~

Hi Girls

Firstly Char, my thoughts are with you.

Secondly I agree that even when you are having a good day you still get those anxious moments. What really bothers me is that even when I am having a good day I start thinking about my anxiety and it makes it worse. I am fed up with trying to feel better. I have tried everything. I am now starting CBT to see if it helps. I also agree that PTSD does rear its ugly head and flashbacks appear out of the blue. I would so like to remove that part of the brain but hey ho.

Anyway I wish you well girls, if anyone has any tips on sleeping I would gladly like to hear them, I cannot remember tahe last time I slept all night. That in itself makes me anxious.

Have a good day and thank you for being there.

Ina xxx