This is going to sound wierd - I don't really know where to start....I thought I'd experienced everything the menopause (peri) could throw at me over the last 5 or 6 years, with hot flushes coming and going, periods starting and stopping, sleepless nights, increased migraines, bladder problems, emotional highs and lows (especially lows (mild depression)) etc. Anyway, my periods finally ceased (hooray) about 15 months ago, and although the flushes have increased, I was on an emotional even keel at last for several months. Just recently though (a few weeks) the roller coaster has started again..........brain fog so bad some days that I struggle to add 2+2, my words get muddled and come out wrong, and thinking is just too difficult. In addition, my mood can snap from 'normal' to 'weepy' at the smallest incident, I often feel paranoid (everyone hates me), and work can be hell on earth, as, when I feel weepy, there is nowhere to go, no release, and it builds up in my head and round my eyes until I feel like my head is going to explode. What on earth is going on? I've reached menopause, so shouldn't things be starting to settle down a bit?
I've so much in life to be happy about - lovely husband, two wonderful adult sons, two equally lovely daughters-in-law and two beautiful grandsons. Add to that a steady job and a good income - why do I feel like this? My sense of humour and perspective has disappeared- nothing is funny any more, I'm too busy trying to get through the days without making some horrendous cock-up at my job.
I can project an image of a 'together' person most of the time, but it's not what I feel inside. I fear I'm going to be 'found out' soon.
I'm 46 btw, so early-ish menopause, but not abnormally so.

Hi Supergran,
I am sorry I have no answer for you but you sound like you could use a big hug. So here's one coming straight to you while you await a reply from one of these wonderful ladies on PS. I'm sure someone will have some ideas for you.
(((((((((((((Supergran)))))))))))))
xoxo
Jan

have you lost weight recently ?

Thanks for the hug....appreciated. Thanks to modern technology it crossed the Atlantic and reached Scotland in less than 5 minutes.

Hi, no, I haven't lost weight (well a couple of pounds maybe, but nothing to speak of). One thing I've noticed though is that I'm not having to work at keeping myself from gaining weight. During perimenopause I had to work at maintaining my weight where I want it for the first time in my life, but it's no effort at the moment.

yeah .. me either Im just asking because fat stores estorgen ,, and some women re-experience menopausal symptoms when they start to loose weight post menopause..

That's really interesting. I vaguely knew about fat storing oestrogen, but I hadn't considered what might happen if there was less of it than usual. While I haven't lost a lot of weight, I have exercised more than usual in recent months, so could possibly have less fat and more muscle...
Bring on the doughnuts............

Wow! I remember most all of what you are going through. I am so sorry. I would not wish this on my worst enemy!

I was so brain foggy that I could not remember anything. I am a lover of literature, but I stopped reading altogether because I could not remember the first sentence of a paragraph. At work I resorted to writing down everyone's name. This was bad. I was able to fake my way through, but inside, I knew that I was functioning on a very low level. The happy smile that I glued on my face was only skin deep. Underneath I was miserable. At my job, I had to be razor sharp. I had to calculate figures accurately at lightning speed. I resorted to using a calculator. Many times, I would ask my clients if they would like a cup of coffee or excuse myself saying that I would be right back because I wanted to top off their coffee cups. Ha! Ha! I really went to another room in order to re-calculate my figures.

So what was the cure? For me Bio Identical hormones. It is a sad fact that as we age, our hormones decline. With hormone supplementation, my migraines and fuzzy thinking stopped. It's so funny, but I don't like taking any type of drugs...and here I am, on bios. At this point in my life, I just can't go back to the way that I was before. I don't know how long that I will be on them at this point, perhaps for life?

Have you ever had your hormones checked? Or on you on bios? I don't have any easy answers on how to balance you out without them. If a good diet & life-style was enough to keep one sane, I would have been fine.

Shebee

Hi Shebee,

Thanks for sharing that, it's good to know I'm not the only one who has had this experience. I also work with figures, and often have to move very large amounts of money between accounts, so I can't afford to make mistakes - an extra, or missing zero could be a disaster.....it hasn't happened yet, thank goodness, but I have made a few other silly mistakes recently. They haven't caused any problems or comment, but they worry me as I know I wouldn't be making them if I was 'normal'.
I get the occasional day when I feel more feel switched on, though never razor sharp, but for the rest of the time I have varying degrees of fuzziness.
I've never heard of Bio Identical hormones before (I doubt whether my doc has either), and I'm not on HRT or anything - yet.
I think my very worst 'brain dead' days are a mixture of messed up hormones and silent migraines- the pain doesn't always develop when I have an attack. I'm becoming increasingly aware that on these days I'm not as alert as I should be when driving. This worries me a lot as I would hate to be the cause of an accident in which someone else got hurt.
I'm seeing my doc on Friday this week to see if he can fix me up with something that will help, especially with the weepiness and paranoia, before I end up making an idiot of myself at an inappropriate time.
I have tried to get through this without HRT - I've been having menopausal symptoms for about 6 years, but right now I'm willing to try anything.
Did you ever get back to enjoying books? I love reading too, but I struggle to retain what I have read.

Hi, I just had to write and tell you that you sound like me writing that! I am not on any hormones, but I am considering them as I feel just as you do. I so desperately want my old self back..and I am 42!

I wish I could offer you an answer, but unfortunately I don' t have, I would if I could though

Just wanted to send you my support and understanding.

Take Care,

Sunny~

So sorry that you are not feeling well. You may want to get Dr. Northrups book, "The Wisdom of Menopause". It covers a lot of ground and will give you some info. on bioidentical hormones as well as herbal and other remedies.

Hi Sunny,

Thanks for your support, it's appreciated. I hope you find your way through too.

Thanks for the contact and the information. I'll try Amazon for the book. I've read one or two others on menopause, but I need to broaden my knowledge base a bit, and find out what remedies are available other than hormones.

Dear 'supergran'
I am sorry you are having such a rough time of it lately.
I am 58 and still on HRT.I know that there are a lot of ladies who take the Bios-not available in my country.
For me the Hormonal treatment really works but I quite understand those who wish to try other alternatives so definitely wish you luck with that..
Have you had your Thyroid levels checked recently as I agree that a lot of what you are experiencing could also be due to some hyper or hypo deficiencies.Worth checking out.
Anyway hugs to you and hope you find something that works for you.
Let us know how things go
All the Best
Elizabeth

Dear Shebee
My cure is the HRT and yes it really does help.I have been on them a long time.
We do not have access to Bios in this country.However I feel comfortable with my decision.
I have regular gyno check ups., and Thank God all well.
When my Gyno.persuaded me to try weaning me off them it was hellish.I exercised and ate well but all the old symptoms came back.So after a year of various Herbal remedies etc. got right back on the HRT.
It seems that there are ladies who do continue to get very difficult to almost unbearable symptoms Post and those who do quite well.
In the end,I think each of us has to decide what is right for us and our bodies and go along with that.

Anyway am very pleased that the Bios. work well for you.Our 'sanity' is very precious and I refuse to feel miserable for anyone!

Warm Hugs
Elizabeth

Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the contact and for sharing. Yes' I had my thyroid levels checked out about 6 months ago when I was in another 'brain dead' phase, however they were normal and the phase passed until just recently.
I haven't tried HRT but will be discussing it with the doc tomorrow. I have been very opposed to taking HRT for various reasons, but I'm willing to give anything a go now if it will give me my brain back. I'll report back in due course.
Thanks again for getting in touch
All the best
Allison (Supergran)

Oh, yes! I now read and research like I used to do. The hormone replacement made all the difference. I also would experience a pre-migraine state on many days. My doc often gives extra Estrogen to patients that are experiencing migraines. He has a book that he writes down all of his patients that had migraines and now don't. I bet my name is in that book, now. Since starting bios, I have not had one migraine.

Start reading about bios; many women have to educate their doctors. LOL!




Elizabeth,
If I did not access to bio-identicals, I would do HRT, too. There is no way that I ever want to go back to being a shell of a woman. I am enjoying life again...with out any meno-symptoms.

I really wish that there was some herbal pill that would be effective. By the way, I always look forward to reading your post!

Have a good day,
Shebee

Supergran, you sound just like me. I am 52 and post meno about 2 years and recently began experiencing all the symptoms you described. The worst of all is the mood swings and mild depression. Someone asked if you has lost weight. That hit home with me as I have recently lost a few pounds (about 8 pounds) and right after that the symptoms you described; the one's that were all so familiar to me from my peri days, returned. I never thought about fat holding estrogen; interesting. I am also considering HRT, but am still on the fence. I am not sure why I am scared to take them, but then again I am scared of everything anymore. I wish you well and I will follow your progress on this topic. Take care and keep us posted.