Hi All,

Does anyone find it difficult when all the literature about menopause focuses on hot flashes and irregular periods and vaginal dryness, and your symptoms are much more comprehensive than that?

About a year ago, I started with intense weakness and exhaustion yet feeling weirdly wired at the same time (making sleep difficult), balance problems, and just feeling generally unwell. Also all the internal trembling, and a good amount of achiness. Periods all over the place -- sometimes only 25 days apart, several months no period at all. When periods come back, it's like the period from hell -- bedridden with headache and terrible pains (even urinating causes intense pressure-like cramps) and even a low-grade fever sometimes. Also shortness of breath going with the exhaustion. Palpitations -- of course. No hot flashes per se, but definite clamminess. Lots of bloating and feeling yucky in general. And complete brain fog.

And, of course, the anxiety and depression.

The doctors have checked me out and told me that it is all caused by anxiety. I -- stubbornly, perhaps -- continue to believe that the physical symptoms are causing the anxiety and depression. What I find most difficult is the absolute unpredictability of it all. For a month or a few weeks, I'll feel human. Then suddenly -- hit with horrible symptoms that make it hard to get through the day.

I have been under a lot of stress for in recent years. Personal and professional problems. Now my job is taking away our HMO. Our premiums are going up 30 percent and they're switching us to a major medical plan with a huge deductible. I seriously think about getting another job with better benefits, but I'm just scared I won't be able to pull it off because of feeling so crappy.

Are these symptoms really all related to peri? And if so, why do we mostly only hear about hot flashes and vaginal dryness?

I guess I'm just looking for a little support and validation.

Thanks,
Missy

Hi Missy,

Just to validate I,m forever thinking "can this be hormones??" I feel so ill some days with a concoction of symptoms,drunk head, moving/random aches/pains/,nausea,sinus type issues,dizzyness.
As you not the "usual meno symptoms" that are normally mentioned (yet!! I,m sure they will rear their ugly heads) and that is why I have been numerous times to Dr,s,who have run tests,and then come to a FULL STOP and recommend AD,s and counselling,as my bloods are ok???

I as you feel it,s hormonal YET I feel so rough and blood test say it,s not hormonal so then I doubt it which leads to awful health anxiety.

My last Dr did say many women can be very sensitive to any hormonal shifts and as my bloods are ok he thinks this maybe the case.
Yet I still get fixated and any twinge I have my brain goes into overdrive with "what if,s" just hate it.
My periods are horrendous the pain is worse than childbirth,yet I feel ailment free other than pain during periods,my worse time is after now.

And also I can go a couple of weeks feeling ok and i get a bit smug thinking "its over I,m going to be ok now" then WHAM BAM back to square one again!!

I despair with you I,m 43 just thinking how many years of this!!!!!

Take care
KathS

Thanks, Kath. Oh, do I know that feeling of on a good day letting myself think "Great! I'm okay! I'm getting better!" -- only to get hit the next week with all the weird stuff. I continually try to find a rhyme or reason, thinking that if only I knew what the triggers were, I could do somethign about it. When in actuality, "one day at a time" is probably the best approach.
Best, Missy

yes, unfortunetly , menopause comes with a stereyotype, hot flashes are the main one , and what gets me is the medical community is the main culprit of putting this in our minds, oh just a few hot flashes and some irregular cycles and bam, at 51 no more periods your menopausal, urgggggg gets me so mad.......

I'm with you. I don't have hot flashes or vaginal dryness. I'm not even sure what a dry vagina would feel like! BUT, anxiety, fatigue, insomnia and that just "unwell" feeling. Then, I have a patch of good days and I too think, cool, I'm cured! Then, a crappy patch again. Today I actually feel flu like, but it's not developing into anything. I'm sure it's just hormones. But I too am always on the fence, is there something really physically wrong with me or do I just have to put up with it because "it's just hormones". The fact that it's hormones is no consolation. It still makes me feel like crap! I'm only 42 and don't want to live for 10+ more years like this!!!!!!

I am 46 and could not agree more!!!
There is so much more to this perimeno stuff than hotflashes and vaginal dryness!!!!

I am 32 and in the same boat !!!

Dear God , why didn't u give men the ovaries and us the balls ???

Hi Missy ..... I would say, yes, these symptoms sound exactly like peri! I've had everything you've mentioned, and more .... so have most of us here. Just because a dr. doesn't "validate" you, doesn't mean it's not true! We HAVE to have a lot more confidence in OUR OWN perceptions of what is happening to our OWN bodies, whether validated by a medical "professional" or not .... that means nothing, because in reality, you can go through all these insane tests, only to ind out you're "ok", and THAT'S WHEN the dr. decides to tell you he THINKS it JUST MIGHT BE hormonal ... geez!
Keep in mind ..... the medical "profession" is far from perfect, and definately doesn't know it all, .... 100 yrs. ago, they thought they knew it all then, and 50 yrs. ago, they thought the same, and people still blindly just put their faith in them, when really all along, they only knew what they COULD KNOW up to that point in time....well, it's the same today ... they only know, what they can know up till today, but 50 or 100 yrs. from now, it'll be diff. again, and HOPEFULLY they'll know more about peri .... so you see, IN REALITY, science doesn't have the answers for everything, they only adhere to what our particular time period is advocating, and has figured out UP UNTIL NOW, which means that what is thought of TODAY as being the "answer", by tomorrow, may NOT be the answer, because now, they've figured somethning else out! ..lol .....

So,..........all that said, the point is, TRUST YOURSELF! If this feels like peri, if it feels hormonal, it prob. is ....
you are a better judge of what is going on with you, than anyone else. Besides, when a new symptom (or an old one for that matter..lol) rears up, and scares the daylights out of me ..... i remind myself, hey......I never had any of these stupid crazy wild symptoms before in my entire life ..... UNTIL PERI ....., so therefore, it's probably peri ... and every time, that's what it's been ........ oh, believe me, i know full well, the "what if's" ... yeah, that can really seriously do a number on you ....then, i run for the xanax ... lol .... but after a day or so of the next horrifying symptom, I realize I'm still here, still breathing, still functioning, (well, sort of! ), and eventually...............it fades away ... (then something ELSE starts!)....

This peri trip is a hard one, unbelieveably stressful, and frightening, and when we finally get through it, there better be a huge chocolate sundae on the other end!!!!!!!!

If it wasn't for this board, I'd think I was dying of a dreaded disease, because all you hear about peri is the couple of symptoms you mentioned. In fact, I did think something was terribly wrong with me until I found this board! My periods are like clockwork and I have no vaginal dryness (I'm just beginning the hot flashes), so I don't have the "classic" symptoms. My doctor thinks I'm nuts.

Thank God for all of you ladies who are on this roller coaster ride with me. I hate that others have to go through these horrible symptoms, but I'm glad we have each other and we can empathize with others' troubles! I'm convinced we know more than the doctors!

Hi Missy,, yes .. I am experiencing everything you mentioned and them some .. feeling like Im getting the flu sometimes .. and more .. itchy,, hair falling out ,, body aches .. saturday I had a sinus headache so bad I felt like vomiting ,, I am on day 58 now without a period .. just living he||.

we already have the balls

Today I feel flu like off an on. It never turns into the flu though. Hormones... really??? OMG how can it possibly be? But.... alas... there is no other explanation.

YES. I am having all of the symptoms you mentioned.... !

So many of the things we go through in peri are not easily quantifiable, so medical docs have a really hard time talking about them......... most docs that is. I am lucky to have a doc who "gets it" and validates my experience of peri and is working with me. She was the one to tell me that the blood test would probably not reflect what's going on with my symptoms, she explained about the saliva test and said it was expensive and still might not give an accurate reflection of what's going on for me. She is happy to help treat my symptoms according to my needs and preferences: diet, stress-reduction, supplements, AD medication, etc. Her practice includes a bio-identical hormone therapy specialist who I'll see when and if I want to go down that road. We know our bodies and we deserve to have health practitioners who work with us. I hope you can find another clinician who has experience with peri and can help you make a treatment plan!

All best,

Cynthia

You are so right! I have none of the traditional symptoms and until I found this Board, I was sure something was really, really wrong with me neurologically. I suddenly started having night jolts, trembling (internal & external), twitching fingers and toes, palpitations, etc. I wasn't particularly stressed - in fact it started while we were on vacation. I had no idea what it could possibly be until I googled some of these symptoms and found this site. Only then did I connect the dots and realize that all this might be related to the fact that I had skipped two periods and might finally be heading toward full-blown menopause. I'm still having tests done to be sure nothing is seriously wrong but I'm also going to find myself a doctor of alternative medicine who bucks tradition and believes that "hormones interrupted" don't limit themselves to causing hot flashes and dryness.

I totally get it! I know this may sound weird but I would love it if I only had the typical symptoms - at least I would know for sure that is the source of my problems. I should start by explaining that I have fibromyalgia, raynaud's phenomenon, irritable bowel syndrome and ulcerative colitis. All of these conditions had been under control UNTIL I stopped continuous birth control to see if I had reached menopause. I have had every weird symptom mentioned on this board and still do not have answers for all of my symptoms. I have not had a period for 20 months. My estrogen level is still perimenopausal but my FSH and progesterone levels say I am post menopausal. Not sure if it is that imbalance causing all of the problems but I have only had brief periods of feeling OK during these last 20 months. ALL of my illnesses are flaring but I have added in intense paresthesias, internal trembling, twitching, migraines and general muscle weakness along with anxiety and depression.Got sent to a neurologist with a normal exam as a result, of course. All other tests and exams are normal. I tried replacement hormone therapy - made the the paresthesias worse. I tried just progesterone 14 days a month - that sent my blood pressure through the roof which is one of the few things that had been good! My internist suggests I treat the fibromyalgia with some of the new mediciations but they are not so great and I am nervous to try them. My gyn suggested a very low dose anti-anxiety might help me tolerate all of this but I am afraid of trying that as well. I am driving my family crazy and they really are supportive but they don't know what to do with me either I keep hoping time will ease the crazy symptoms but I have days that I feel like this is the way the rest of my life will be. Now throw in the problems that just come along with age and I want to scream! Feels so good to vent to you all and know that I am not alone.

Hiphousewife.
I also have FM and CFS and DVT.
I am continually fatigued. Sometimes Overwhelmingly so.
I have been on Prometrium (Bio-Identical Progesterone) capsules since January 2002. I am 46 now but I wasn't in perimenopause when I began. I was 38 yrs ol and because of the 2 1/2 yrs I had been on Coumadin (blood thinners) for the DVT my body forgot how to stop bleeding when I had my period. I becamse severely aenimic and lost more white blood cells than my sister who was going through treatment of Stage 4 Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma at the same time. The vascular doctor was sure that it was something gynocological and not the blood thinner I was on. I just felt he was wrong. It turned out that I had never had my blood levels even in all the time I had been on coumadin and then the body platelets for got how to do their job. The gynocologist was called in while I was getting transfusions and she pulled me off coumadin and wanted to put me on synthetic hormones but I balked at that .They found the Prometrium which was new at the time and I have been on ever since. I take 100 mg at night (enough to put me to sleep but not necessarily keep me asleep). It has helped to a degree with the PMS symptoms that would be so awful. I had cramps that would just put me in be for two days straight (I always went to work though--I worked through the pain with my teeth clenched).
I was diagnosed with FM in 1991. I was in a car accident which was more than likely the cause. The insurance would only pay so much for the physical therapy and then I just had to remember to do it. I ran a dept for my job and it was often times demanding.
I do not have children (the DVT put me at risk if I were to get pregnant). I am the oldest however of a number of siblings and I have 10 nieces and nephews age 10 and younger. I help my siblings and my parents (who are older) quite a bit. I guess it is the addage that I take care of others before myself. I feel guilty when I do do things for myself.

I have tried vitamins and minerals and I was on Zoloft for a time. I was able to get off and almost now refuse to go back on any AD. i know that my emotionsa are all over the place and I will cry at the drop of a hat sometimes but oh well. I guess people will just have to accept me as I am.

I'm two weeks away from my fiftieth birthday and had, I think, my first hot flash yesterday. Up until that moment it never occured to me that I was peri-menopausal. My periods remain regular and easy as they have been my entire life. But psychological changes! What a relief to discover I am not simply getting stupider, losing focus, becoming more disgruntled and dissatisfied, lazier, that my unfounded anxiety is not a sign of lunacy. My peri-menopause is like me non-traditional. Obviously, I am also not sleeping so well.

Perhaps the knowledge I now have thanks to all your posts will help me keep things in a better perspective and reduce my guilt for not managing to be quite the person I was a year ago. The knowledge certainly gives me hope that this "not quite sally anymore" phase will pass.

My gratitude and best to you all.

Sally

I agree with you completly. My first symptom was aching legs. Then the dizzy spells, which lead to full blown panic attacks. I thought I was losing my mind. No one tells you this could be hormonal. Other weird stuff happening: digestive problems (consipation, gas, acid stomach), muscle problems (my shoulder is so bad I need to go to PT), hip and butt nerve pain, breast pain? I've had so many CT scans and MRI's in the last year I should glow in the dark! Could all this weird stuff be peri?

I get that with bad body aches and muscle pain in my back and shoulders.