Has anyone found themselves unable to work due to all the anxiety, panic ect... from peri?meno?

Lil, so glad you brought this up. My anxiety got intense starting about a week and a half ago, and especially when I tried to up my Zoloft. The worst I had ever experienced and I NEVER want to feel that way again. So... this week my anxiety at work was very intense. I am fortunate that I have a job I love, with my own office and own desk, so at least I'm not on display and have alot of people who I have to interact with, I can just sit there quietly, if I want (maybe that's worse). I love my job, and love the people I work with, there are only 6 of us in my department. However, this week work became a real trigger for me because I was afraid I was going to get those horrible feelings that I had the previous week. Monday I made it till 1:30 then I went home. Tuesday, not terrible, stayed on my xanax and made it all day. Wednesday I only made it an hour, then said I was sick and needed to go home. Thursday, made it ok most of the day and Friday I just stayed home period. I am DETERMINED not to let work become a trigger. I love my job and cannot lose it. So I'm going to have to figure out some way to get on top of this fast! I have my first appt with a psychiatrist next Tuesday. Also reading Claire Weekes book today. The work thing is ridiculous to me because I've worked there for 15 years. It's not a scary place. Anxiety s#cks!

When all this started for me, about six years ago, I had to cancel several appointments (am a photographer) off and on due to the anxiety and not ever knowing what the day would bring at that particular time. I have to say that I truly admire you ladies who manage to continue working during all this turmoil!!

gyz

I finally threw in the towel about 3 weeks ago. I was trying really hard to come into work dragging my tearful, mopey. depressed negative self in. I only work with 3 other people and I am an integral part of getting stuff done. I just couldn't do it anymore. I felt like it was just too much stimulation for my nervous system. Just the thought of going to work put me in anxiety mode. I went to the Psyche, he gave me Lexapro (I was already taking Xanax it seemed almost every day), previous to that I had tried Prozac but it didn't help, made my anxiety worse. My co workers/friends totally understood and just want me to feel better. They ended up hiring another person and they are managing fine without me. I don't want to stay away forever, I also work with a funny than heck, great group of people. However, I need to take care of myself. I am fortunate that financially I can do this for a little bit until I start feeling better. Right now, I just want to hibernate and keep everything quiet. I am still on the fence about Lexapro it kind of makes me tired and a bit unmotivated, the anxiety is a bit better but I still do get it especially if I put myself in certain situations. I'm not quite agraphobic (sp?) but in some ways I kinda am.

Work is the exact opposite for me....i am so thankful to have my job,it's what is keeping me sane.I have anxiety some days just thinking about going,but i go anyway and i stay so busy that i forget about everything else in my life,including my symptoms.I work part time though,by choice,i don't think i could handle working full time.I also don't think i could ever go back to just being at home and not working,i honestly think i would have a nervous breakdown.Everyone is different,my sister quit her job when she was going through peri,and i applaud her for doing what was best for her to be able to cope.I'm sorry any of you are having a difficult time....do what's best for you.

I know exactly how you're feeling. I was forced to quit working two years ago because of my terrible anxiety attacks. I just couldn't take it anymore. When an ambulance is called for you several times in the course of a year, your co-workers start wondering.......

Hi Mich,
I just saw this post about you and the Lexapro and felt I needed to respond. My son is on Lexapro and he said that when he started he felt really tired for about the first 6 weeks and then all of a sudden he started feeling much better. I hope the same thing happens for you. I started with a Naturepathic Dr. the same time you began the Lexapro. She has me on amino acids, vitamins, etc to fight this depression. I am feeling kind of strange on them also. I felt like I was doing a bit better but then the past two days have been difficult. Maybe I will just have to ride this one out also.
Thinking of you,
Bev

Hey Bev,
How are you doing these days? I hope better. Well, I sure hope that is true, I have not been on them even a month quite yet. It would be great if that happened for me. I'm glad your son is doing well on it. My brother in law was on it but he was sleeping all the time. I don't sleep all the time I just have a sort of laziness/tired feeling going. He switched to Effexor and loves it, he liked Lexapro except for the fact that he slept all the time, with Effexor he feels the same minus the sleeping. I just don't feel like switching quite yet. I want to give it 6 weeks and see what happens. I did end up going to my nephews first birthday party yesterday and had a good time and felt relaxed. I didn't even have to take my "morning" xanax. I haven't really woken up with the morning jitters/anxiety for a while, but, I was kinda taking the Xanax for a little bit of restlessness I was feeling in the morning, then I would end up napping which to be honest felt good. I have had so many years of not sleeping it's a treat to nap. However, I am going to try to forgo my morning xanax unless absolutely necessary. Don't want to build up a tolerance plus don't want to use it if not necessary.

Bev,
Jeesh, see what a goofball I am. You told me how you were doing. I know we are all struggling to find relief and it all kinda feels like a lab experiment. Yeah, nothing like being a lab rat, lol. Maybe it will take time for your body to adjust to the stuff you are taking. I hope it works for you. Forgive me, but I forget have you tried AD's? Hang in there, there has to be something that is going to help, keep trying. I know I am going to if this doesn't work. (((((hugs))))) Mich

I've always had to work and quitting was not an option. Well, I could always quit but I don't know what I would have done; I'm sure we would not have qualified for financial assistance. My husband always worked full time but he didn't earn enough to pay all the bills and the mortgage and buy the food and take care of every expense that came up. We've also had unforeseen expenses like car repairs and new appliances. I had to finally buy a new vacuum cleaner when mine of 25 years was too old to fix anymore, and two years ago I had to get a new washing machine for the same reason; my existing one conked out. Either buy a new one or go to the laundromat, and that by itself is more expensive in the long run than a new machine, not to mention the inconvenience of driving back and forth and hanging around the place waiting for your laundry.

I had intense driving panic in peri all of a sudden, and there were two separate occasions that I can remember leaving work in the early afternoon due to a cry urge and an overwhelmed feeling that I just wanted to go home and get into bed and close my eyes and be alone. But I never had the luxury of doing this very often. I don't know if being more or less forced to work had any impact on getting through meno, and I'm with Moonlight because there have been lots of days when my job kept my mind off of me. I had to get up in the morning and get myself to work, so I did, and perhaps because of this I didn't sink into as deep a hole as I might have otherwise. Just about every day, I have to put on a smile whether I felt it or not and greet co-workers properly. Sometimes it helped me get into a better mood, just acting as if I was okay when I wasn't. But I'm older now and the infernal rat race is getting harder. I hate having to rush around every morning when I'd much rather sit and relax and sleep until I feel rested instead of getting up in the dark and taking a shower. I've got two more years of this before I can retire with full benefits. Next month on October 1 I will have completed 25 long years at this job. So that's my story.

You are both probably right about having to get up and work giving you that extra push you needed to not totally fall into the abyss. You woman are strong and I admire you very much. You do what you need/have to do. We all have different ways of coping and different reasons for our choices. For me, it was a hard decision to make in terms of letting co workers down and even feeling kind of weak because I wasn't "bucking" up. But, I have bucked up my whole life under extreme pressures and situations before because I had no choice. This time I do have a choice to take care of myself, admittedly I may be going a bit overboard with the sleeping in until 9 or 10 am (which sorry girls I love love love, lol) and doing as little as possible. But, I think over the years all the stresses I went through (ex abusive spouse for 12 years, foster homes, molestation.. to name a few) and had to suppress or deal with has taken it's toll. There was a time that I would have had no choice, I was a single Mom when I started Peri, though it didn't manifest itself with anxiety or panic yet. I had to work no matter what. Then I married a wonderful guy which has made my life and choices better. My body needs me to honor what it is telling me right now which is to "heal". I do not intend to be a lump forever but it just sometimes feels good for me to just be, even if it means I look a little disheveled (sp?), act a little reclusive, indulge myself (totally, lol). I am forcing myself to go out to Costco in a bit to pick up a prescription and something for dinner. I told my husband I would handle dinner, he does it most days and he works all day. He is a gem, but, I don't want to take advantage of his good nature, lol. I cannot not work forever, but, I can probably take 6 months off or so off until I hopefully feel up to dealing with the day to day interactions of people, places and all that that entails. All of us are doing the best we can for our situations and we are all fighters in our own way. Kudo's to each one of us here. Take care, Mich

Mich, you deserve a good rest; it sounds like you've had a very hard life (harder than mine). So you've earned some time to heal and get back to yourself. I also take Lexapro and I remember that I felt tired for a few days but it went away and now I'm fine. I wish I had been able to stay home when I went through peri because I cried at work and was very stressed and irritable with my husband. I had a really bad period of insomnia for two years, and so many days I had to get up after an hour of sleep and try to go to work. So if you can rest, do it. You're very strong and you will get through this; I'm glad you have a wonderful husband--you deserve that, too.

Thank you so much for the wonderfully kind words CSugar. I so appreciate them. Yes, I have had a rocky road some not my fault some because of bad choices. But, I will say I am a survivor, but, that said, I have made peace with pretty much all of it. My ex has colon cancer and we are actually "friends of sorts" he is my son's father and I feel like I am happy and he deserves to be happy and well. He had a tough life/childhood as well which made him the addict and angry man that he was when we were together. I guess it is no surprise I went down that road given my childhood, though I wouldn't have thought I would have (I thought I had a better head on my shoulders) I guess sometimes things are imprinted in you that you don't realize and there are journey's you are supposed to take and learn from. My childhood was not good, but, I now have a wonderful relationship with my Dad a recovering addict of 22 years, he is a wonderful support and makes me laugh and shares his awesome wisdom with me every day plus his wife who I did not get along with (jealousy issues both sides) for many many years, she did some awful things, well she and I are very very close now. Forgiveness is an amazing thing isn't it? The only thing that saddens me is I would of loved growing up with the Dad I have now. But, such is life, he went through the holocaust, so he carries his own sorrows and scars but at 55 years old he got clean. Can you imagine at that point in your life having done what he had done his whole life and turning it around. Truly amazing. Not to say there wasn't anger and resentment on my part, it took years to work through it, but we did. My Mom died without me really knowing her. Foster homes my whole life. Family members who didn't step up. So that is my story and you know what even through it all which there is ton's more I have always been taken care of from a power greater than myself and I have to believe that during this time in my life that power is still there for all of us.

Mich, you have a loving and a forgiving spirit. That is what has carried you through all of these hard times. If you are happy now, it's because you have brought it to yourself. I truly believe that we create our own destiny; what goes around comes around. You're a good person and we need all we can get in this world! (((Hugs))) And maybe if you had grown up with the Dad you have now, it would not have been good like it is now.

Once again thank you for the kind words. I am a believer that things happen the way they are supposed to. I would never have met my current husband (who is a gift) without the timeline as it was. He has been a miracle for me and my son. He was married for 18 years separated 1 1/2 years before we met. So, if things had been different in any way I may not have ever found him. I certainly wouldn't have my son from the addict/abuser. I also have another 25 year old son from a previous marriage (I was not married to the addict/abuser, that much I could not do) who is just wonderful (just graduated chiropractic school). I'm no saint, certainly not always as good as I could be but perfection is never really the goal for me anyways. But, I do try to be as good as I can be especially with the hormonal havoc my body is going through, lol. You get to a point in life that you have to try and shed anger and hostility from the past so that you can find peace in the present. Have a good day and thanks so much. You are also a kind and caring person and that makes the world a better place for having you in it. Take good care. Mich