I get these day,s when I just don,t want to talk or to talk to someone can get me anxious . In meno and all this crap is really starting to get to me, it,s almost like when I,m talking it doesn,t feel like me talking sometimes Sounds weird huh? Can anyone relate? Could the anxiety cause that doesn,t happen alot but enough to bug me.

Yes, I have felt this way and then when I speak I feel like the words are going to come out jumbled and then I get painickly and feel creepy-like hard to describe. I get this instant icky feeling in my stomach too. Sometimes, i'd rather not speak at all.

I hear you weird isn,t it? The only time I really didnt,t feel that was on HRT but due to sideeffects can,t take them.

I know exactly how you feel. Just last night my husband and I were talking about having our daughter and family over for dinner. At one point I said, "I sure enjoyed VISITOR with them today." My husband said, You mean VISITING? I repeated what I said before, "I enjoyed VISITOR." Once again he said, "Not VISITOR....VISITING." We almost had an arguement over it! It was like in my mind I was saying the right word, but I wasn't. It took me several seconds to realize I used the wrong word. I felt like I was crazy. Kind of scary!

Hey, I can relate. When I was suffering the worst of my anxiety, talking to people made it sky rocket, to the point of panic attacks!! I seriously became a recluse, couldn't even talk to family members most of the time. I just wanted to be left alone in my bedroom, with the door closed. Being able to come to Power Surge is all that kept me from going stark raving mad, I swear!! Yet there were times when even THAT drove my anxiety up. It was the worst of times.

I live in the country and do like my peace and quiet But I do get lonely! Yet I want to be left alone?????
I rarely answer the phone!

Its a day to day thing with me. Mostly I email or text. Everyone kind of knows how I am right now. I feel like I just need to decompress and quiet the world around me. I hope this won't last forever. My sister and baby niece stopped by yesterday (she texted me first to see if I was up to it) I enjoyed it so much (we all took naps, lol, that's the one of the good things lately sometimes I can actually take a nap these days, LOVE THAT!). I enjoyed my little baby Mila, she is a ball of energy, but, honestly, at a certain point, I wanted to retract again and be by myself. But, thats okay, I am dealing with this in the most kind way I can to myself. My family and friends know I really love them and they all always check in on me via text which I'm cool with and I love them for honoring my (temporary...I hope) strangeness.

P.S. I also make it a point to check in to see how everyone else is doing via text or email. I don't want it to be one sided. I want to be there for my family and friends in whatever capacity I can. It's hard to be totally self absorbed (but to be honest I kind feel like I am to some degree, lol)

yes i feel the same we had friends over last week and i had to stay in my bedroom its a really strange feeling hope it passes soon for us all

I think ive had every weird scary feeling imaginable...sometimes i talk and i feel like my brain is going to explode...i think its tension...or i wait for the car door to shut and until it does my head goes weird...dont ask me why we go through so many things..i feel like one thing goes and then the next thing hits. I get days i dont want to answer...just seems that there will be less stress if i keep quiet. so i understand how you feel.

Thank you all for responding!!! It,s almost like your listening to yourself talking strange what Hormones can do to us.And that all so common disconnect junk that,s another good one don,t get that as much anymore unless the anxiety flies, Thanks again to all of you!!!!! LOL

Feeling like I'm not connected to my own body, and that my voice isn't coming out of my own head, has been one of the worst symptoms for me. I've been feeling this way since October and it's very frustrating wondering if I'll ever be myself again. That said, it's been a little better since I've been taking bioidentical estriol. But then again, I have lyme disease which also causes some pretty weird symptoms, sigh.

Anyway, you're not crazy and you're probably not losing your mind either, even though it may feel that way. A lot of us have been experiencing this too. Hang in there, lots of hugs coming your way.

Cindy

I lived in 2010 for 2 weeks even though I was consistently told it was 2009. I finally burst into tears and thought my family was playing a joke on me.

I have stopped mid sentence and forgotten what I was saying.

I have zoned out when talking more times than I can remember.

I have lost my wallet......IN MY OWN HOUSE......and cannot find it.

I run through every word in the English language that sounds like the word I am trying to say......incongruous, inconsistent, incompatible, incompetent, inconclusive....aaahhhh! Incomplete!!!! Thank you, tired stupid brain......

I hate talking.......it gives me anxiety.......because it is a kind of thinking that my brain cannot catch up with......

You are not alone babe......be real selfish with talk time......some time on your own in silence is a good thing.

Take good care......

Hugs,

Michah

ABSOLUTELY have felt this way! My voice sounds like a strangers sometimes. There are days i want to scream when i get home and see that my family is already there!! I just need a while alone----then there are days i hate to be alone!
ARRGH!!!

I don't have panic attacks but some days I just don't want to talk. I want everyone else to shut up around me!!

DH makes me nuts with his never ending questions!! GAH, some days I could just scream my lungs out.

We must be twins. I don't have visitors other than my kids. The females I know love to gossip and nit pick. I would just rather be left alone, but I love to talk with my powersurge sisters. I guess I am weird. People say I am stuck up cause I don't hang out or care to be in a group of people, especially women. I noticed that when I do force myself to hang out with them, it is always some kind of problem that occurs. I don't need that kind of foolishness in my life.

I get that all the time. I have posted before, for the most part I am a hibernating bear. My preferred way of communicating with everyone other than my hubbie and son, is texting or email. Really don't like to talk much. I can babble though really well via email, lol. I just like my personal surroundings real quiet other than the TV, I live in my room or living room. It's frickin' wierd I tell you. Oh well, I'm lucky my husband just accepts me as is. Comes in many times to say he loves me and adores me and gives me kisses. My son does his best to stay out of trouble and not cause me worry. What more could I ask for at this point? I just wish I felt more a part of the world, but, in the same token I guess it is what it is. I just can't handle too much much over stimulation and talking feels like that for me sometimes. Take care my sisters.

Me too...and I'm also off for the suumer so it gets real peacefully lonely at times...youngest is 17 so he passes through and back again for sleeping, showering or food...have been making some attempts to reach out to friends as the feeling life is too too short to spend doing absolutely nothing 'cept some laundry and dusting and straightening things out around the house...I think within the next summer or two (once the 17 yr old is mobile and working and college-bound) I'll be looking for a pt job or volunteering a lot....

I've got to finish this transition from full-time mother defining me to redefining who I am as an empty nester....not an easy thing to do as I find myself mired down in the nothingness of it all!

I find too many women are caught up in the "oneupmanship" bs and it tires me out...I am a free- spirited person who takes people for who they REALLY are and not what I can drain out of them to make myself look better....materials things bore me and I hate the slave to fashion AKA lemmings who follow the most mundane nothingness all to feel part of something...I have resigned myself to being alone in my thoughts vs a lot of muddled drivel....does that make me stuck up? Probably to some...but it is who I am for whatever the reason.....

That said, it seems here at PS, there are a like of "birds of a feather" so I find comfort in sharing these thoughts as a lot of us, especially at out age, share this outlook.....

Like the ugly duckling who sheds her feathers to find a beautiful swan, I await my next role in life......if alone and contemplative is me, I accept it....

I am so happy that I stumbled upon this thread. I just joined the site last Friday and added a long post in the "Am I entering per-menopause" area, so I'll be brief about my situation here. I'm 34 and weaned my 17 mo. old son from breastfeeding last February and then suffered a very traumatic miscarriage (lots and LOTS of bleeding) back in March and then began having panic attacks. Those have subsided, but my anxiety has been awful ever since and I've feared for my life ever since. I've had all kinds of odd symptoms, but the mouth/talking thing has been one of the most upsetting/worrisome for me. I've always been extemely out-going so not wanting to talk feels very bizarre. My anxiety started with a tingling sensation in/around my mouth followed by panic attacks where I felt like i couldn't swallow, so I think my anxiety has really settled in my mouth (or rather, I'm fixated on this area). I can go days or even weeks where my mouth feels "normal" and I talk fine, eat fine, swallow fine, and then all of a sudden I get fixated on it again or feel some tingling and then my tongue feels sort of swollen (even though it's not) and talking feels strange. Sometimes it feels like I'm talking but it's not really me talking (I guess sort of out-of-body or something) or talking feels like a chore and my mouth/tongue are just too tired to do it and I fear I'm slurring my words (I know I'm really not). I've had all sorts of tests but no one has tested any of hormones apart from a basic TSH test (big surprise, huh?). I'm seeing a doctor who specializes in women's hormonal issues in two weeks and I can't wait. I really hope she can help me get balanced a bit. I don't doubt for one minute that I have anxiety (I've always been an anxious person and I think really bad anxiety was boiling under the surface for a long time waiting to escape) but I also believe hormonal imbalances have added to my situation. Thanks for the support and for listening.

Hello Travel and welcome,
I am glad that u found this post also. This getting older stuff is like watching yourself turn into someone else. I am glad for all of u ladies here. Thank u all for sharing your thoughts with me. Powersurge is a nice place to find people going thru the same ordeals. Have a great day all.

I get the exact same thing sometimes when I talk I feel the same way like it,s not me talking!! I thought I was going nuts!! The only time I didn,t feel like that was when I was on hormones So you see your not alone .

My big thing lately is I cannot STAND to talk on the phone. I HATE TALKING ON THE PHONE. It's like I feel that wire is connecting me to a hangmans noose or something. I think its some wierd form of claustrophobia where you feel suffocated by the phone and whoever is on it. It makes me feel terrible guilt when my most important people in the WORLD, my children call and I feel strangled by the phone. I tell them I HATE TALKING ON THE PHONE. Come visit me in person.

Then again, after about 15 minutes of conversation (thats on a good day) I cannot STAND to be in a conversation. I WANT OUT. I FEEL TRAPPED. I try to hold up my end but it's no use. I can feel the panic rising from my curling toes, to sweating pits to knotted stomach and bulging eyeballs...looking around for some way to escape! I find about a half dozen excuses to leave and then come back when semi composed. I do this at restaurants and find myself gasping alone in bathrooms staring at my disheveled self in a mirror. Washing my hands in hot water because the hot water calms me down. So this is how obsessive compulsive order begins?

I was always dyslexic, so messing up words is not all that unusual. Writing a straight, legible sentence is hard now. The words keep mixing themselves up and some of the words I thought I typed are other words. I also say the wrong word at times for lack of anything better to do, I guess. Sometimes its funny and I am the inevitable butt of my own inadvertent joke. I guess I feel like the joke. Sometimes its just so embarrassing everybody kind changes the subject. I love everybody kind. It's marvelous when they change the subject so gently and go on without a laugh, smile or eyeball roll. Later, when you realize what you said or did, you want to kiss or hug them.

I hate menopause. I hate this transition. I hated puberty and this seems far worse to me. I always says menopause is puberty in hard reverse. I hate getting old. I never thought I'd say that. My husband has muttered it at me for years and I always chide him. I always correct him. But now I am him in some stupid way. I hate the fact that when my hormones shift suddenly they don't warn me. There should be a BIG YELLOW FLASH before your eyes with the warning, "PLEASE BRACE YOURSELF, A SUDDEN HORMONE SHIFT IS OCCURRING." Then, about 15 minutes later a BIG RED FLASH before your eyes with the words, "THE WORLD IS NOT TILTING. IT IS YOUR HORMONES! YOU HAVE NOW ENTERED A MAJOR HORMONE SHIFT...GO GET YOUR MEDICATION NOW!!!" (repeat NOW five times and then end flashing lights or else we go nutzoid.)

That would help. Instead I get this incessant, nagging anxiety and cannot stop thinking about myself, my breathing, fear of panicking and my entire focus is on resisting it. That goes on a day or two and then suddenly I drop into this dark hole of depression. I only know I am there because my head feels funny, I feel tired all the time, every muscle and joint in my body hurts, I sleep poorly and I keep thinking such thoughts as I don't know what life is really about, why am I here anyway, what good am I? It's just sheer hopelessness. If I go get the xanax and take it, I can say a prayer and be myself - the survivor menopausal self - again in about half an hour. I never know how long the hormone shift will last or what wierd symptoms it will bring. But my head always feels funky and I get sort of dizzy, clumsy, spaced out, self focused...blah blah blah. Food does not appeal to me or taste good even then.

So, this went on longer than necessary. You must have hit a button with me!

Your story is exactly mine. It's the strangest thing really, isn't it?. I have said it before on the board I can email all the live long day and even text, so that is what I have told everyone. That if I don't answer the phone and then don't call back they know it is not a good phone day. If they really need me or want to "talk" to me just email me and I will respond. I know it's not as personal but it's better than nothing, right? They all have the gist of it now. I have just been honest with everyone. I know it's a bit peculiar but it is what it is for now. This too shall pass.....hopefully. I take Lexapro and it is helping with the anxiety a bit. I'm down to Xanax once a day, but, funnily enough still don't like to speak on the phone.. ohhhh well. Take care of yourself. Mich

BRAVO!!!!!!! YOU RESOUND ME EXACTLY......I JUST WANNA BE ME

This is truer than true. First, that ICKY nausea in my stomach and I can't stand my body, then it fades if I try really hard to focus on something else, it hits at the strangest times and I can't stand anyone, nothing feels normal, the whole world tilts.
The phone ringing makes me jump out of my skin. Talking to someone for awhile at work heats me up, the sweat beads start and I have to pretend and keep smiling.
I sleep with Xanax help only.
I answered the phone at work: "Good morning, Jane Doe EATING", not SPEAKING ... i almost lost it and was grateful it was my Aunt who is living with multiple myeloma, and that gave her a laugh galore.
I got out of the truck for work and kissed my husband and said HELLO instead of goodbye.
Just a few examples.
Nervous, don't want to talk to many females at all and am surrounded at work. My husband gets me so that is good - we have his birthday coming up, have invited only friends we have known forever, but I know when that morning comes I will feel like throwing up and will have to medicate myself to get through it. Now I am crying at my desk and missing my Mom who died 28 years ago. I just don't know anymore. Who am I and why am I here on this planet? Thanks for listening. I have to stop crying, snotty nose at work not acceptable....

This whole thing of not wanting to talk to people has drawn me closer to keeping my office door closed when I get here to work. I use the excuse of it being too cold in the hallway or I don't want to disturb other people in the office, but really it boils down to I don't want other people talking to me. I want to be alone

I HAVE TWO PROBLEMS. THE FIRST IS: SPANISH IS MY FIRST LANGUAGE, AND OF COURSE ENGLISH MY SECOND, SO, MY BRAIN GET SO BAD THAT I CAN START TALKING ENGLISH AND FINISH IN SPANICH OR VICEVERSE. I'M WORSE THAN YOU CAUSE SOMETIMES CAN'T FIND THE TRANSLATION IN MY BRAIN AND THAT MAKE ME SO FRUSTATED. WERE I WORK , THE COMMUNICATION IS VERY IMPORTANT AND SOMETIMES FEEL THE MUSCLE IN MY FACE TO TIGHT CUTTING THE CIRCULATION INTO MY BRAIN MAKING MUCH DIFFICULT TO FIND THE RIGHT WORDS AND TALK TO THE CUSTOMERS. IS LIKE SHORT CIRCUIT IN MY BRAIN angry: YUCK!!!!!!ALL THAT C--P STINK.


MENOSICK

I have the exact same thing. My daughter calls on the phone and telling me about her new job and I become so anxious because I can't have that back and forth chatter like I used to have with her. It's just such an effort and I start I guess hyperventilating because I become dizzy and I can feel myself getting tight in the chest and stomach. Even when she comes over now because she got married last year and I feel like I have to be "ON" and get so anxious. My stomach muscles tighten up and doesn't release until they leave. Strangers don't do this to me. I guess because I love her so much and miss her and it's just not the same her just visiting instead of her living here and being with her everyday. So instead of enjoying her visit I get this stupid, stupid anxiety and spaciness. I don't know how to get over this. I am on paxil 10mg for years. This was for outright panic attacks. But what I have is different now. It's like something wrong with my brain and body. Wondering if switching to lexepro would help me. My 80 year old mom says because I try to hard when my daughter is over.

I have a large glass of wine in hand when I make my weekly phonecall to my fave aunt. I have to find things to talk about and LAUGH or she doesn't want to talk to me ... or starts with "what is wrong" and because she is an ex-nurse, she LOVES to hear about problems, encouraged me to get a hysterectomy when I didn't need one (and I never got one and it turned out didn't need one), and I can never talk to her about menopause because then it starts with "oh I am so sorry you are getting older, I am so sorry you are falling apart" and I can't handle that. So like when you talk to your daughter, when I talk to my favourite person, I have a glass of wine, big sip before I punch in her number. And talk about having to be ON ... if we are together and I am not entertaining her or making her laugh, she comes right out and says "WHY AREN'T WE HAVING FUN AND LAUGHING"... because I actually can't think of anything to say and like you feel this SPACINESS I am so worried about everything and getting words out. And if she thinks I am OLD and USED UP, she will only want to talk to my younger niece (who she was able to convince to have a hysterectomy ... go figure) and relegate me to the trash heap. Everything feels forced, right now. We know this will pass, just have to give it time.