I am going through a lot of emotional stress right now.I have two family members who are dying.One may not last the month the other has been told 4 months.I also have three kids who are getting ready to go back to school,my peri issues,and a brother in law from hades who verbally accosted my dying mother in law last week.I am so stressed and tense that I have tension knots in my shoulders and back.The tension knots are causing a constant dull headache and numbness in my face.I am sore and tired all the time.I have tried to relax,I have tried epsom salts bath,a massage from my hubby-they work for a little while then it comes right back.I know what is causing it-STRESS!! Big time tension-I am wearing my shoulder blades as earrings,but I can't make it stop.I desperately need help.I cannot afford a massage therapist or accupuncture. I have considered calling my dr and asking for something to help but what should I ask for?A muscle relaxant?Xanax?Oh ladies,I am so sad.I read about a new product by Simalsan that is for tension-has anyone tried that?I really need advice.Thanks and GOD-bless

WOW...you poor thing! I am so sorry to hear about your family members.
I would tell all this to your doctor and let him/her decide if you need meds to help cope. I think I would need them!!

Hugs and God bless.

OH Dear..I am so sorry to hear about the members of your family being so ill....

I too have re-occurrent tension...the only things that work for me are stretching and deep breathing exercises....

I hope you find some relief...I agree a doctors visit is in order.

HUgs
Maura

Hi honey,

I am so sorry to hear about all that is going on in your life right now. That is alot for anyone to handle. The very best way to handle this......sit in a chair, shut your eyes and just allow your body to droop.....actually tell your shoulders to drop....it feels amazing to do this. Then alot of stretching. Right ear to right shoulder and hold for 10 - repeat with the left-nice and slowly so that you can feel the pull along the neck muscles. Then look back...waaay back...hold for 10-----then chin to chest - hold for 10. Keep repeating this...it truly does work. Sometimes having hubby try to rub out the knots has the opposite effect so easy does it on the massages okay.....stretching is the key to this. I do speak from experience. I have degenerative disc in the neck and when I get tense it is excruciating to live with. I had two options. Surgery to fuse or stretching. I opted for the stretching and thus far (touch wood) it is bearable and I can settle it down considerably. Try it and try to be good to yourself okay.

I appreciate the replies.I called my dr and she was not in-I left a message asking if she can cal something in for me to help me relax and sleep better.It is taking forever for me to fall asleep because of the tension.I will try the stretches,and I hope it helps.I am really desperate,I am getting short tempered and have almost zero patience left.I may ask my dr for a xanax prescription,or a muscle relaxant.I need to be able to relax.GOD bless and thanks again

Hi sweet......

How is your sleep? What things can you step back from? Sometimes it is good to prioritise in your mind what you need to do.......talk to your family and tell them what help you need (outside of the massages! ). Do not sweat the small things, like a clean house and that sort of stuff......MAKE SURE you take time for YOU. We have a tendency to ignore ourselves in times of crisis. It is okay temporarily, but long term it can have terrible effects.

How about valarian which is a natural relaxer. Zinc, magnesium and B6 are also very important. You can take supplements with Xanax if that helps. Your doc should be able to tell you about that.

Support yourself to support others babe........I am so sorry about your relatives, it must be a very hard time for all of you.......prolonged grief is very hard, is it not? .

“Anticipate the difficult by managing the easy” Taoist Proverb..........

In stillness and take good care.....

Michah

((((((((((((((((LadyE)))))))))))))))))))

I am so sorry this is happening to you. I am truly sorry about your family members too. You have a lot on your plate right now and the stress is going to surely show through physically.

I agree with some of the other suggestions here and I would like to add one more.

Everyday at 2 p.m. I make myself a BIG cup of coffee, go into my bedroom, close the door, and read my local newspaper from front to back especially the funnies section. If I dont have the paper then I read a chapter in a book or the from the Word. No tv, no kids, no radio, just blessed silence for 30 minutes.

I know this does not sound like much but it gives me a chance to stretch my body out and try to totally relax it so that the muscles are not bunched up. I try to completely clear my mind of everything else going on and just read quietly. I do it everyday. At first it was hard getting the the chance everyday but I decided on that time and everyone knows that is my time. DO NOT DISTURB!

I hope that all of our suggestions help you. I pray for your peace in mind as well as body.
Hugs to you,
Jeaninne

After doing this, I feel better. If

Lady E, I can't believe your going through all of this. Did you post this a while back about your MIL finding out she had cancer? I seem to remember reading this and I think you said she was like your own mom. Hopefully I am remembering correctly. I am so sorry. Last year while going through my legal mess, I had to sit at the computer and write briefs for hours and hours. I fired my attorney and had to manuever the system alone "Pro Se." I developed these knots in my neck and shoulders that caused me to wake up with a neck so bad, I could not turn over in bed let alone turn side to side. I let that go on thinking it would go away. Literally 5 weeks of that torture. Finally, My doc prescribed Flexeril. It will not only help you to sleep, it's a muscle relaxer. The other thing I was told to take was my Xanax because that relaxes muscles and muscle pain. (But not together or the same day!) Then you can add your Epsom salt baths and massage from hubby. Make sure your taking your Calcium/ magnesium and add flax to keep muscles and joints supple. Your in my prayers dear friend...... Debra

good morning,

I really feel bad about all you are going through. I know that xanax has helped me so much when stress is at it's worst. I heard Flexeril is a great muscle relaxer too. I filled a prescription once for it for tmj and didn't use it, but should have a should now. With all you are going through, you need to number one, sleep and a med will help, and number two, getting your mind and body to relax is very important. I am not pushing drugs, but sometimes, it is what you need at the time to get you over the hump, of course try all the other non med ways first, which it sounds like you did, but then for this little time of life you may need a little more to help take off the edge. I hope you get some relief soon. I have never heard of Similsan,so cannot help you there. Good luck and keep us posted.

Dear 'Lady E'
Am very sorry about all he stress you are under.
It might well be that a small dose of Xanax as it will not only relax those tense muscles but will help you to calm down and sleep better in order to cope.
God Bless
And Keep us Posted
Warm Hugs
Elizabeth

Hi Lady E,
I'm sorry you have so much sadness and tension in your life right now. The loss of two family members along with kids going back to school on top of PERI! You really do have a lot on your plate.

Just a suggestion which might help with the discomfort of the tense muscles...ice. If you haven't tried it yet, give it a whirl. I've had back, shoulder and neck problems most of my life. For years I would treat it with heat and while that felt good, it did nothing to ease the spasms. Once those muscles are tense for this long, they are inflammed and angry. No amount of heat will do it. Try putting an ice pack on the affected area for say about 20 min. on and 20 min. off. It might take all day and night doing this but it works for me. And just an FYI, remember ladies, heat can SOMETIMES make an injury or pain worse but ice NEVER will. The only exception is no ice on a burn, only a cool damp cloth. Try the ice pack for awhile and see if you feel a little better. This in conjunction with the stretching should make a difference.
Best wishes and warm hugs to you! Feel better soon!
xoxo
Jan

Hi, I would ask for 2mg valium (you can get generic) There is nothing like valium for tension in the neck and shoulders, I know from experience! Trista5

yes i take the " mothers little helper " 5mg and its great for tension, i tried xanax first but my anxiety is so severe it needed the valium......

A little update,my dr called this morning(well,the nurse)and said that she was going to write me a prescription for ambien to help me sleep.I had told them yesterday in my message that I was having a lot of trouble resting because of the tension.I just hope I can get the generic and I can afford it.Thanks again for all of the support.My mother in law is very special to me and seeing her suffer is so hard.My brother and I are finally talking after over 20 years of silence,and it is hard to watch a 40 year old man waste away.I am a worrier anyway,so I hold stuff in.I need to take better care of myself,and I am going to try.GOD-bless and thanks again

OH Liz...geez! WEll, so much for asking how you are! I"m sorry about this, you DO sound tense as heck, I can feel it through the computer. .... ok, I take xanax, which you know ..... it really is a God send kiddo! Yes, I would ask for that....it not only relieves the anxiety, but also relaxes your muscles! I've tried Klonopin, but it did nothing. However, some people swear by it, so, it's really an individual thing...but to me, xanax is the best! Yeah, your situation right now, is a real tension causer, and on top of that, you're dealing with peri. .... i know for myself, when i'm THAT tense, which can be pretty often really, nothing really helps, except the xanax .... I will pray for you kiddo!!!! BIG HUGS!

Thanks sweetie.I am actually doing a bit better.I have taken the ambien three times and gotten three full nights of sleep.Just resting makes a huge difference.Thanks for the prayers-we always need them.GOD-bless

I'm so glad you are feeling better after some sleep. Life is a lot easier to take on with a rested body and mind! I m glad you reacted and got what you need to carry you through for the time being!