Alright ladies, I'm trying to figure out what the heck this is and whether it's meno or something else. As some of you know, I've been wrestling with horrific symptoms that feel neurological since about November. I was diagnosed with lyme disease in April, had excessive bleeding for about 6 or seven months that caused me to become very anemic, but now haven't gotten a period in about three months. I'm taking medication for the lyme (an antibiotic and another drug that is used for malaria, to combat a co-infection with an organism called babesia). I'm also taking bioidentical estriol.
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
Full Version: Odd Sensations in Head
QUOTE (cross18 @ Jul 31 2009, 11:18 PM) 
Alright ladies, I'm trying to figure out what the heck this is and whether it's meno or something else. As some of you know, I've been wrestling with horrific symptoms that feel neurological since about November. I was diagnosed with lyme disease in April, had excessive bleeding for about 6 or seven months that caused me to become very anemic, but now haven't gotten a period in about three months. I'm taking medication for the lyme (an antibiotic and another drug that is used for malaria, to combat a co-infection with an organism called babesia). I'm also taking bioidentical estriol.
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
Cindy,
Not sure what is going on. Can one of the meds cause these sensations?
Just wanted to send you hugs and hope you figure it out or someone can relate and help.
Robin
QUOTE (surreallife @ Jul 31 2009, 08:51 PM)
Can one of the meds cause these sensations
I have no idea any more. I think I had these sensations before taking meds, but I'm not even sure. God, this is so bizarre. But thanks so much for your support. I really appreciate it.
C
Cindy,
I have not any of this, but wanted to send you some hugs and best wishes. I hope you can get some resolution soon to all these latest symptoms.
Thinking of you....
mood_swinger
I have not any of this, but wanted to send you some hugs and best wishes. I hope you can get some resolution soon to all these latest symptoms.
Thinking of you....
mood_swinger
Cindy
All those symptoms sound horrid! Poor you!
Could it be the estriol?
I am unable to take it- even a tiny dot sends me off the planet.
I get woozy, tired, depressed, tearful, and have feelings of detachment. It's as though a wall comes down in my head. I have been known to stay in bed for a whole day after one little dab of estriol cream because I am unable to function.
That nose feeling you are describing is how I feel when I have hormonal overload. Kind of a pressure feeling but I want to cry.
Although estriol is supposedly very weak it is bioidentical to the hormone made in abundance in pregnancy. Some women do well on it. Others, like myself cannot get on with it at all as the side effects are awful.
I have such bizarre side effects with estriol that i just cannot use it-even in a tiny dose!
Conversley I am using a much stronger hormone-Premarin and I am much better with that.
If I have already said this to you on another thread then I apologise.
I think I have posted something similar in the past but I am unsure if it was in reply to one of your posts.
janet c
All those symptoms sound horrid! Poor you!
Could it be the estriol?
I am unable to take it- even a tiny dot sends me off the planet.
I get woozy, tired, depressed, tearful, and have feelings of detachment. It's as though a wall comes down in my head. I have been known to stay in bed for a whole day after one little dab of estriol cream because I am unable to function.
That nose feeling you are describing is how I feel when I have hormonal overload. Kind of a pressure feeling but I want to cry.
Although estriol is supposedly very weak it is bioidentical to the hormone made in abundance in pregnancy. Some women do well on it. Others, like myself cannot get on with it at all as the side effects are awful.
I have such bizarre side effects with estriol that i just cannot use it-even in a tiny dose!
Conversley I am using a much stronger hormone-Premarin and I am much better with that.
If I have already said this to you on another thread then I apologise.
I think I have posted something similar in the past but I am unsure if it was in reply to one of your posts.
janet c
QUOTE (janet c @ Aug 1 2009, 02:42 PM)
Could it be the estriol?
You know, I'm wondering if if it could be the estriol??? I've had so many bizarre symptoms since October I'm having a heck of a time figuring out what is causing what and when each symptom actually started. But now that I think really hard about it, some of these strange sensations may have started since taking the estriol which was about 2 months ago. In fact my doctor really didn't want to prescribe BHRT because he said I didn't need it, that all of my hormone levels tested either normal or high, except for possibly the estriol, so he had me take it on a trial basis.
And you know, today I had tried a little experiment. I didn't take my other meds early in the day like I usually do, except for the estriol. If I think about it, the annoying symptoms didn't start up until a short time after I did. I was so disappointed because last night I went out to listen to some music, found the music really seemed to make me feel better, almost human! And while I'm not recommending it to anyone else necessarily, I had one glass of wine (sangria actually) and it calmed me down to the point where I was able to laugh and dance a little and feel like I was really having fun. Maybe there is hope though after all???
(I'm going to digress a little, but I think it's kind of important for me, perhaps for others too. With all the weird physical stuff going on, there is definitely an emotional component to all of this. When I force myself to go out and be around people I usually do much better than if I stay home alone and obsess and worry. I actually felt really good for a while last night. I had gone out by myself but ran into several friends and neighbors at this local club. It was funny, in fact because I hadn't even been planning on going to the show that I did. I had been at a restaurant wine/beer bar that has music but was getting tired and started walking home -- I only live a few blocks away from the small downtown area in my little town. As I passed a doorway where this rock band was playing I stopped to listen for a minute by the open door. Some [drunk] young man asked me if I was coming in and I said that it was too expensive and I didn't have enough money with me. So he grabbed my hand and said, no you're coming with me. He went up to the man taking money and said that he worked for a magazine, was writing an article about the band and that I was his MOTHER and needed to get in free, lol. Amazingly the guy at the door said, sure, as long as you drink a lot. I never did get anything else to drink since I already had my one drink maximum, but ran into all these people I knew and ended up staying until about 12:30 am, WAY past my usual bedtime. And I felt GREAT! BTW, not only did I get in for free, but I got two posters and a sample of this weird cola drink called Howling Monkey. Check this out www.moonalice.com)
That is an interesting story.
I too always feel better when I am out and about and getting on with life. I can almost switch off the obsessive worry when I need to.
Maybe you could try something really simple. Stop using the estriol for a while and see how you feel?
I warn you -after you stop you may feel terribly anxious and more tearful for a while-well that's what happened to me when I stopped it.
It's worth a try anyway.
Good luck and hope you feel better soon
janet c
Cindy:
I read your post and all the replies. I can tell you that I have had the symptoms you described. It does not happen all the time but once in a while I get them. They come all at once and I feel really strange for a little while. After giving it some thought, I notice that they come usually right before my period is supposed to start (it is so erratic these days I dont know when it will be).
I have had many tests as well. The only evidence on my MRIs is changes caused by my disease but the neurologist tells me that this is not causing my symptoms. He says that my hormones are dancing all over and that is most likely the problem.
I dont know if this helps you at all or not. Lots of hugs coming your way!!
Jeaninne
I read your post and all the replies. I can tell you that I have had the symptoms you described. It does not happen all the time but once in a while I get them. They come all at once and I feel really strange for a little while. After giving it some thought, I notice that they come usually right before my period is supposed to start (it is so erratic these days I dont know when it will be).
I have had many tests as well. The only evidence on my MRIs is changes caused by my disease but the neurologist tells me that this is not causing my symptoms. He says that my hormones are dancing all over and that is most likely the problem.
I dont know if this helps you at all or not. Lots of hugs coming your way!!
Jeaninne
QUOTE (cross18 @ Jul 31 2009, 10:18 PM)
Alright ladies, I'm trying to figure out what the heck this is and whether it's meno or something else. As some of you know, I've been wrestling with horrific symptoms that feel neurological since about November. I was diagnosed with lyme disease in April, had excessive bleeding for about 6 or seven months that caused me to become very anemic, but now haven't gotten a period in about three months. I'm taking medication for the lyme (an antibiotic and another drug that is used for malaria, to combat a co-infection with an organism called babesia). I'm also taking bioidentical estriol.
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
Cindy, Are you taking Plaquinil? I am not sure of the spelling but I was prescribed that drug (originally used for malaria) and know that there are some pretty weird side effects. It was supposed to ease my horrible joint pain. The side effects did not outweigh the benefits. Debra
QUOTE (DebraD @ Aug 1 2009, 11:09 PM)
Are you taking Plaquinil?
No, I'm taking Mepron (atovaquone), which also apparently has strange side effects. I'm so messed up right now that I honestly don't even know if this weird stuff started before the Mepron, or since. The strange thing is since taking the Mepron I feel almost human, but it is possible that some of the oddest sensations are due to the med. My doctor told me he thought I might be having a herxheimer reaction (when there is a die off of the organisms that cause lyme and babesia), but his partner thinks I'm not tolerating the med very well. So, I've cut back to 1/4 dose daily. We'll see what happens...
Cindy
PS I actually went out tonight again to listen to music. I even danced a little. Whatever is going on, it seems like music does make it better, at least temporarily while I'm not dwelling on it. I am really determined at this point to get past this and get on with my life, but DAMN this is hard...
QUOTE (cross18 @ Aug 1 2009, 08:18 AM)
Alright ladies, I'm trying to figure out what the heck this is and whether it's meno or something else. As some of you know, I've been wrestling with horrific symptoms that feel neurological since about November. I was diagnosed with lyme disease in April, had excessive bleeding for about 6 or seven months that caused me to become very anemic, but now haven't gotten a period in about three months. I'm taking medication for the lyme (an antibiotic and another drug that is used for malaria, to combat a co-infection with an organism called babesia). I'm also taking bioidentical estriol.
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
Dear Cindy
Am sorry you are not feeling good and having all these weird symptoms.
My guess-only as a lay-man,no medical training-is that your body had become so overloaded with all the Meds. you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?
The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that.
I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting
God Bless
Elizabeth
Cindy,
I have felt all of what you described...I'm not on any med's for Peri. I think theat burning sensation might be like a hot flash, because every once in a while my hot flashes feel just like that! It's so wierd!! I often feel detached as well...like I'm living in a dream world. I get twitches in my head and electric shock feelings at times too....they make me jump out of my skin...NOT pleasant at ALL!! Hormones can make us feel SO nutty and they affect everyone so differently, but you can bet your boots there's someone out there that has felt it the same way.
I hope you are feeling better today and I thank you so much for all of your great advice as well (yesterday). You made me feel so much better!
I have felt all of what you described...I'm not on any med's for Peri. I think theat burning sensation might be like a hot flash, because every once in a while my hot flashes feel just like that! It's so wierd!! I often feel detached as well...like I'm living in a dream world. I get twitches in my head and electric shock feelings at times too....they make me jump out of my skin...NOT pleasant at ALL!! Hormones can make us feel SO nutty and they affect everyone so differently, but you can bet your boots there's someone out there that has felt it the same way.
I hope you are feeling better today and I thank you so much for all of your great advice as well (yesterday). You made me feel so much better!
"My guess-only as a lay-man,no medical training-is that your body had become so overloaded with all the Meds."
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
QUOTE (SirenSong71 @ Aug 3 2009, 10:45 AM)
Cindy,
I have felt all of what you described...
I have felt all of what you described...
OMG, have you really??? It's horrible if you have, but in a way kind of comforting to know I'm not the only one, sigh. For me the feeling of being detached or somehow not quite "real" -- this is so hard to explain! -- is the absolute worst, and I feel like it transformed me from a busy, active, social and relatively normal human being into a lonely, confused. depressed zombie.
Alright sister, enough whining for now. I managed to send out two letters about employment this morning. I'm going to go take my dog for a little walk now, then I have an appt with my therapist. My son's gone until tomorrow night at a friend's family's cabin in the Sierra foothills. So I think I'm going to force myself to go out tonight to this local cafe.wine bar that has "Open Mike" music with no cover charge. As crazy as I feel, it helps to be around other people AND to listen to music, kind of like it helps to regenerate brain cells or something. (Seriously, I hope that's what it's doing).
So, I'm going to sign off for now, but will try to keep you posted later.
Thanks for responding and thanks for the support. It REALLY does help.
Love,
Cindy
PS Where do you live in NJ? My PS friend DollieDee had a lot of similar symptoms and she's from NJ too.
i too get weird head feelings. pressure, in sinuses and ears. detached and foggy and flip floppy heart.
it comes and goes and usually lasts only a day. it was much much worse before i started on the dot.
before the dot, this head thing would put me to bed. felt like the flu almost. really horrible. i'm so grateful for the dot. never thought i would ever ever use any hormones. for some reason thought i would skate through menopause with no symptoms. ha ha......funny.
i have to keep on top of my thyroid numbers as well. balancing thyroid, estrogen AND progesterone......whew....is wearing me out!
but the head thing is weird. i think it's a variation of a hot flash. i call it a head surge.....a vascular head surge......(i made that up!)
mary
it comes and goes and usually lasts only a day. it was much much worse before i started on the dot.
before the dot, this head thing would put me to bed. felt like the flu almost. really horrible. i'm so grateful for the dot. never thought i would ever ever use any hormones. for some reason thought i would skate through menopause with no symptoms. ha ha......funny.
i have to keep on top of my thyroid numbers as well. balancing thyroid, estrogen AND progesterone......whew....is wearing me out!
but the head thing is weird. i think it's a variation of a hot flash. i call it a head surge.....a vascular head surge......(i made that up!)
mary
QUOTE (maryinaustin @ Aug 4 2009, 04:05 PM)
but the head thing is weird. i think it's a variation of a hot flash. i call it a head surge.....a vascular head surge......(i made that up!)
mary
mary
Hi Mary,
Welcome to Power Surge and thanks for responding. As hard as this is it really helps to know others are out there who understand!
Cindy
i've experienced the foggy detached "not really here" feeling. i think it's caused by estradiol. it's gotten much better since i began estrogen supplements.
QUOTE (lunamylife @ Aug 4 2009, 09:29 PM)
i've experienced the foggy detached "not really here" feeling. i think it's caused by estradiol. it's gotten much better since i began estrogen supplements.
My doctor recently wrote me a prescription for BHRT which added a small amount of estradiol to the estriol I'm already taking. I haven't picked the RX up yet because I am SO broke. But I think I should figure out a way to pay for it and give it a try. I just can't stand this any more, sigh...
Cindy
Cross, you are a champion.......hope you feel better soon, sweets.......take good carexxxxx 
Hey Sisters,
As you probably know, I've been really, really (really) having a terrible time since October. Between lyme, menopause and stress off the charts, I've experienced a total physical and mental breakdown. That' the bad news. The good is (in no particular order):
I just got back home from listening to music with a good friend. It was relaxing and pleasant and I had a really nice time. I felt almost normal!
I went swimming today in a beautiful pool at a local swim and tennis club. Long story short I was asking if I could pay a daily rate to swim, because I find the swimming to be good therapy. The two older men at the desk stalled me and made a lot of small talk, then they handed me a membership card. They said that I didn't have to pay, only had to promise them I'd say, "yes" the next time someone asked me for help.
Yesterday I made a pitch to the Town Council to start an afterschool tutoring/homework club in the fall. One of the councilmen sent me a message on Facebook saying the door was open and he would work to help make this happen. He also commented that he believes in angels (in response to something I had posted on FB). Today a neighbor told me he had something for me. It was a beautiful angel ornament that looks like a white bird with a gold halo.
My doctor called me today. He's setting me up for several free treatment (microcurrent) that are supposed to help with stress. He's also sending me several samples of meds he thought might help me. One is a normally very expensive drug used to combat one of the infections I've got (babesiosis). The other is a psych med (seroquel). He said he had mixed feelings about it, but his associate recommended giving it a try. I figure it can't hurt to try a dose or two at night if I can't sleep. He also said he's sending me a check to pay for a test he wants me to have (some kind of urine test that checks for vitamin deficiency -- B and zince, I think??? -- because he knows I can't afford it. He's getting some other med from a colleague back east that has developed a new treatment for lyme and is going to have me try it. He reminded me that the Universe does provide and he wants to see me recover and is willing to do whatever it takes to see me through this. Just knowing he cares so much made me feel SO good.
A member of my synagogue dropped off a meal for me, my son and my mother today. It was really delicious. My rabbi called and said she is sending out a check tomorrow.
A man I met through a friend invited me to hear his band play tomorrow night. A few people I know are going and it should be really fun. He put me on the guest list so I don't have to pay the cover.
Saturday my son's band is playing at a town celebration aptly called The Good Festival. There will be music, games, free icecream and food. I will be surrounded by friends and neighbors who care about me.
Sunday I was invited to a "games group" that meets at a restaurant that has live Irish music. We play card games, word games, board games or whatever. It's good old fashioned (wholesome, lol) fun and I will be with really nice people.
I thought I needed to buy my son new football cleats. Turns out the ones from last year fit him fine and he says they're REALLY comfortable now that he grew into them.
I thought my dog was sick yesterday, but he's fine today. We took a little walk earlier and he looked so happy. My cat is now curled up on a pillow next to me. Before she fell asleep she was licking and licking me!
Alright ladies, I'm going to go before I turn back into a pumpkin.
Lots of hugs,
Cindy
As you probably know, I've been really, really (really) having a terrible time since October. Between lyme, menopause and stress off the charts, I've experienced a total physical and mental breakdown. That' the bad news. The good is (in no particular order):
I just got back home from listening to music with a good friend. It was relaxing and pleasant and I had a really nice time. I felt almost normal!
I went swimming today in a beautiful pool at a local swim and tennis club. Long story short I was asking if I could pay a daily rate to swim, because I find the swimming to be good therapy. The two older men at the desk stalled me and made a lot of small talk, then they handed me a membership card. They said that I didn't have to pay, only had to promise them I'd say, "yes" the next time someone asked me for help.
Yesterday I made a pitch to the Town Council to start an afterschool tutoring/homework club in the fall. One of the councilmen sent me a message on Facebook saying the door was open and he would work to help make this happen. He also commented that he believes in angels (in response to something I had posted on FB). Today a neighbor told me he had something for me. It was a beautiful angel ornament that looks like a white bird with a gold halo.
My doctor called me today. He's setting me up for several free treatment (microcurrent) that are supposed to help with stress. He's also sending me several samples of meds he thought might help me. One is a normally very expensive drug used to combat one of the infections I've got (babesiosis). The other is a psych med (seroquel). He said he had mixed feelings about it, but his associate recommended giving it a try. I figure it can't hurt to try a dose or two at night if I can't sleep. He also said he's sending me a check to pay for a test he wants me to have (some kind of urine test that checks for vitamin deficiency -- B and zince, I think??? -- because he knows I can't afford it. He's getting some other med from a colleague back east that has developed a new treatment for lyme and is going to have me try it. He reminded me that the Universe does provide and he wants to see me recover and is willing to do whatever it takes to see me through this. Just knowing he cares so much made me feel SO good.
A member of my synagogue dropped off a meal for me, my son and my mother today. It was really delicious. My rabbi called and said she is sending out a check tomorrow.
A man I met through a friend invited me to hear his band play tomorrow night. A few people I know are going and it should be really fun. He put me on the guest list so I don't have to pay the cover.
Saturday my son's band is playing at a town celebration aptly called The Good Festival. There will be music, games, free icecream and food. I will be surrounded by friends and neighbors who care about me.
Sunday I was invited to a "games group" that meets at a restaurant that has live Irish music. We play card games, word games, board games or whatever. It's good old fashioned (wholesome, lol) fun and I will be with really nice people.
I thought I needed to buy my son new football cleats. Turns out the ones from last year fit him fine and he says they're REALLY comfortable now that he grew into them.
I thought my dog was sick yesterday, but he's fine today. We took a little walk earlier and he looked so happy. My cat is now curled up on a pillow next to me. Before she fell asleep she was licking and licking me!
Alright ladies, I'm going to go before I turn back into a pumpkin.
Lots of hugs,
Cindy
QUOTE (cross18 @ Aug 4 2009, 12:04 AM)
"My guess-only as a lay-man,no medical training-is that your body had become so overloaded with all the Meds."
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
Now listen here.cutie pie!If you have any luck with Vijay Mallya-dinner is on you!
So stay strong,my love
Keep us posted
Warm Hugs
Elizabeth
P.S. I think you are actually much stronger than you give yourself credit for.Considering all the emotional upheavels Thank God you have not broken down completely
I know the elderly can be difficult.When my Mother-in-Law was staying with us I slipped a little Valium into her coffee.She slept for about two hours.Naughty I know and I was terrified she might not wake up again but she did and went into full battle again!
All the Prayers and Blessings coming your way!
QUOTE (cross18 @ Aug 4 2009, 12:04 AM)
"My guess-only as a lay-man,no medical training-is that your body had become so overloaded with all the Meds."
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
Hi Elizabeth,
Thanks for the words of support. I'm so confused about the meds situation. Actually, overall I'm doing a lot better since taking meds. Before I started them I was in a complete state of derealization and depersonaliztion for about 5 or six months. At least some of that has dissipated, but the odd sensations remain, and I don't know what's causing them and what to do about it!
"you have to take for your health it is feeling completely exhausted .I also think a lot of it could be Hormonal.Is it possible that you need to have your Bios. adjusted?"
Probably I do have to have them adjusted. I've been experimenting the last couple of days and it seems like some of the weirdness is resolved by taking the estriol, although some of the sensations seem to be caused by it, sigh..
"The depression is also possibly related to the anxiety you suffer from all the symptoms so you might need to check into that."
I wouldn't really say that my depression is due to anxiety exactly. But it has been incredibly depressing to feel like I can no longer function properly, that I haen't felt normal in almost a year, that I lost my job, have no income, no support, have a child to take care of, etc.. On top of that I have outrageous medical bills, a hostile ex husband who doesn't pay regular child support and one of my closest friend just died a couple of weeks ago. I also have a terrible relationship with my elderly mother (we live together) and have been too messed up to really do an adequate job search. (I'm actually supposed to have an interview tomorrow and trying to figure out how to get through that without crying. Worse, I can't really imagine working in the shape I'm in, i.e., when I don't even feel entirely "real" any more!.
Any ONE of these things would be enough to drive a person to the brink of despair. Having them all at the same time, it's no wonder I feel like I'm losing my freaking mind (LOL?).
"I wish you greater Peace and Happiness in the future
Remember things do not stand still and with time,patience and the right doses of what you need will help to ground you
Also your Power Sisters are all behind to listen and help as much as we can
So keep Posting"
Thank you. The main thing helping keep me sane is posting here and the support I get from my PS friiends! Please don't give up on me, girlfriends, and keep those prayers coming. I just answered an ad today for a crazy job listed on craigslist as "customer service" related, apparently has to do with rating stores and restaurants in my area. I also -- OK this is weird, ut what the heck -- wrote a letter to a former employer who literally is a billionaire, one of the richest people in the world (Vijay Mallya, do a search on him!). He might just ignore me, but who knows, maybe he'll have some pit on me and help me out, BIG sigh...
Lots of love Sistahs!
Cindy
Now listen here.cutie pie!If you have any luck with Vijay Mallya-dinner is on you!
So stay strong,my love
Keep us posted
Warm Hugs
Elizabeth
P.S. I think you are actually much stronger than you give yourself credit for.Considering all the emotional upheavels Thank God you have not broken down completely
I know the elderly can be difficult.When my Mother-in-Law was staying with us I slipped a little Valium into her coffee.She slept for about two hours.Naughty I know and I was terrified she might not wake up again but she did and went into full battle again!
All the Prayers and Blessings coming your way!
WOW WOW WOW!!! I felt like standing up and cheering with everything you reported in your last post Cindy!! Just wonderful!!!! See how you are being helped?!! I am a firm believer in God. I always know that help will come...no matter how crazy-scary things get. That one belief keeps me together. I am so happy that everything is working out for you. These are the times in our lives that make us see how we are all so connected to each other. We are not islands onto ourselves...we need each other.
Btw, I live in central New Jersey...I know you had asked where I lived in NJ. I have to look up your friend's name since you said her symptoms were similiar to mine. I am also strongly considering starting a support group here for women like us. I would LOVE to hang out with other gals that know what it's like to go through this. Usually, I am the only one in my group of friends that is going through peri-menopause or at least is accepting the fact that she is.
Please keep posting...and let us know how you're doing. I am feeling much better now...the veritgo is almost gone. I am goign for a sleep study this Sat and a hearing test on the 17th. Then I see the doctor again for the tinnitus. I am also looking for a good doc here that deals with peri and endo.
So glad for all those good things that are happening for you!
Btw, I live in central New Jersey...I know you had asked where I lived in NJ. I have to look up your friend's name since you said her symptoms were similiar to mine. I am also strongly considering starting a support group here for women like us. I would LOVE to hang out with other gals that know what it's like to go through this. Usually, I am the only one in my group of friends that is going through peri-menopause or at least is accepting the fact that she is.
Please keep posting...and let us know how you're doing. I am feeling much better now...the veritgo is almost gone. I am goign for a sleep study this Sat and a hearing test on the 17th. Then I see the doctor again for the tinnitus. I am also looking for a good doc here that deals with peri and endo.
So glad for all those good things that are happening for you!
Cindy...I'm so happy things are looking up for you!
Robin
OMG Sister Friends!
I can't believe it. After almost 4 months I got a period today!!! As you know I've been feeling better overall, but still get these feelings that are so strange in my head. Today I went swimming and when I got out of the pool I was feeling so wobbly and off balance and almost fell when I tried to put my sandals back on. I have been having flashes and mood swings and stuff but my doctor kept sayimg he thought most of it was from the lyme. Arrgghh, maybe most of this is meno hell after all???
Anyway, although I'm feeling strange, I am still determined to go out this evening and make the best of it. So, wish me luck. Thanks SO much for your ongoing support. Love you all!
Cindy
I can't believe it. After almost 4 months I got a period today!!! As you know I've been feeling better overall, but still get these feelings that are so strange in my head. Today I went swimming and when I got out of the pool I was feeling so wobbly and off balance and almost fell when I tried to put my sandals back on. I have been having flashes and mood swings and stuff but my doctor kept sayimg he thought most of it was from the lyme. Arrgghh, maybe most of this is meno hell after all???
Anyway, although I'm feeling strange, I am still determined to go out this evening and make the best of it. So, wish me luck. Thanks SO much for your ongoing support. Love you all!
Cindy
QUOTE (cross18 @ Aug 8 2009, 12:10 AM)
OMG Sister Friends!
I can't believe it. After almost 4 months I got a period today!!! As you know I've been feeling better overall, but still get these feelings that are so strange in my head. Today I went swimming and when I got out of the pool I was feeling so wobbly and off balance and almost fell when I tried to put my sandals back on. I have been having flashes and mood swings and stuff but my doctor kept sayimg he thought most of it was from the lyme. Arrgghh, maybe most of this is meno hell after all???
Anyway, although I'm feeling strange, I am still determined to go out this evening and make the best of it. So, wish me luck. Thanks SO much for your ongoing support. Love you all!
Cindy
I can't believe it. After almost 4 months I got a period today!!! As you know I've been feeling better overall, but still get these feelings that are so strange in my head. Today I went swimming and when I got out of the pool I was feeling so wobbly and off balance and almost fell when I tried to put my sandals back on. I have been having flashes and mood swings and stuff but my doctor kept sayimg he thought most of it was from the lyme. Arrgghh, maybe most of this is meno hell after all???
Anyway, although I'm feeling strange, I am still determined to go out this evening and make the best of it. So, wish me luck. Thanks SO much for your ongoing support. Love you all!
Cindy
Hey Cindy,
Well, there you go. Just when you think you got things figured out...lol.... I hope you have a wonderful evening. I have been on this board all the live long day....seriously. I am on my 2nd day of Lexapro and I am a babbling fool, lol. I've made a couple of new friends, we have been bantering back and forth all day. It was one of those days where I barely moved from my couch. Although, I did actually take a shower and went somewhere with my hubby and then other stuff....lol. But, the majority of my day was on here. It was like a marathon. I think Becca ranked me as the number 1 poster for today up until now because I am gonna go cold turkey and pull myself off of PS for the evening, lol. Mich
QUOTE (cross18 @ Jul 31 2009, 11:18 PM)
Alright ladies, I'm trying to figure out what the heck this is and whether it's meno or something else. As some of you know, I've been wrestling with horrific symptoms that feel neurological since about November. I was diagnosed with lyme disease in April, had excessive bleeding for about 6 or seven months that caused me to become very anemic, but now haven't gotten a period in about three months. I'm taking medication for the lyme (an antibiotic and another drug that is used for malaria, to combat a co-infection with an organism called babesia). I'm also taking bioidentical estriol.
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
I'd have to say that in general I'm doing much, much better over the last three months ago, but it's hard for me to tell whether it's because I've stopped bleeding or am taking the meds and hormones. I have had a few moments recently where I almost feel human again, but I still have these really odd ongoing sensations in my head. I'm trying to sort out whether this is lyme or meno related and am wondering if any of you have had the same sensations:
1. I have this sense of darkness that comes feels like it comes over my eyes, kind of in waves. It seems to be worse when I'm looking down, like if I'm trying to read.
2. I get these odd kind of "jumpy" sensations in my head. They're very hard to describe, but it's kind of like something is moving around in my brain. Seriously, it's a very creepy and frightening feeling, sometimes associated with a feeling of my thoughts jumping around too, but mostly just feeling like a physical sensation.
3. The back of my head burns sometimes, sometimes feels numb and kind of tingly, kind of like a feeling of pins and needles like you might get when your foot falls asleep except this is in my head.
4. I get little twinges of what feels kind of like anxiety/butterflies, but in my head, especially over my left eye. It really freaks me out! And it doesn't feel like it actually corresponds to actual anxiety.
5. I get a feeling in between my left eyebrow and the bridge of my nose that feels kind of like how when you get water in your nose, or a brainfreeze or something.
All of this just leaves me feeling odd almost all of the time. It also feels like there is a "heaviness" or a cloudiness or fogginess around me all the time, that makes me feel very detached. Sometimes I still get the feeling like "I'm" not attached to my own head, almost like I'm just a bunch of nerve impulses but I'm not really real.
This is driving me crazy already. I don't think I even remember what it means to feel normal any more. And while most of this feels physical, after so many months like this I lost my job, don't do most of what I used to and I feel like I've completely lost myself. When I start to think that I'll never fully recover, it also makes me get all freaked out about dying, about not being able to take care of my son, about never being able to work again (I lost my job around all of this). It also brings up all kinds of traumas, fears and pains, just about everything horrible or stressful I've ever experienced my entire life (I'm 52).
According to my doctor he thinks most of my symptoms are lyme, not peri related. He also doesn't think there's anything seriously wrong that won't eventually resolve (I've had just about every test you can imagine: CTs, MRIs, blood tests, urine tests. hormone tests, ultrasounds, etc., etc..)
But I'm just really wondering if any of you have experienced anything like this! It feels more physical than mental or emotional, but I have gotten extremely depressed around all of it and do find that I cry at just about anything. Of the women that I've been in touch with here there have been a few that seem to be experiencing similar things (DollieDee, surreallife, shar-shar, and moodswinger, especially.) But do any of you have these weird feelings in your head? Can anybody really tell me if this is menopause related?
Sorry to be posting this yet again in another way. I just can't believe that I'm still feeling this way. I want so much to be my normal self again!
Thanks,
Cindy
Hi Cindy, I am sorry to hear your dealing with all of these horrible symptoms. I will say this, your in good company. When all of my peri started in 2005, my MAJOR symptom was this depesonalization-detached feeling that left me as if I was stoned on something. Then came the visual disturbances. The darkness in my vision, I cannot even explain that one, you did a good job for me. The weird shocks in my head, now that I know at the time was from coming off of an AD so I at least knew this was from the AD. The detached feeling like I was here, but I was in some sort of walking semi coma that interacted with people, but I did not get to experience my full 5 senses that were usually razor sharp....lucid...
I still fight with that feeling like I am out of my body, or that I am high on something and fuzzy, not really experiencing it...like I am in a dream like state. I HATE IT, it scares me so much that I end up drinking coffee to try to clear my head. I hate to say that it works, but it does help. I think the physical strain of the Lymes can exascerbate these feelings but I don't think Lyme is the sole cause. I would love to know what the heck this is because I have been blaming it on not only my peri, but the fact I am in chronic pain 24/7 with my low back. I figured that has caused some strange reaction in my brain but who knows. I feel like it's all a guessing game.......Debra
QUOTE (DebraD @ Aug 8 2009, 04:51 PM)
The darkness in my vision, I cannot even explain that one, you did a good job for me. The weird shocks in my head, now that I know at the time was from coming off of an AD so I at least knew this was from the AD. The detached feeling like I was here, but I was in some sort of walking semi coma that interacted with people, but I did not get to experience my full 5 senses that were usually razor sharp....lucid...I HATE IT, it scares me so much that I end up drinking coffee to try to clear my head. I hate to say that it works, but it does help.
Guessing game is right! This is SO crazy!!!
I got a period yesterday and felt so much better and clearer in my head. But then today I started getting REALY intense cramping. I called my doctor's office and an associate in the practice called me back. He actually said that he thinks the sudden period is due to the medication I'm taking working, because he said the infection I've got messes with hormones and blood (something like that). He said it was actually very common for women taking the med I am (mepron) to start a period and that seemed to be a good sign. He recommended taking magnesium for the cramping, which I just did a little while ago.
Now I'm feeling really tired and some of the dimness is setting in again. I'm also having some mild hot flashes. Boy I hate this, but it does help to know other women have been through it. I think I must be nuts but I am going back out to meet a friend for a little bit to listen to some music. I think I will probably drink a glass of wine or something to. Then hopefully I'll just be exhausted and able to sleep, praying that tomorrow things look brighter again (like they did for most of the day today!)
Take care sisters,
Cindy
Oops, I forgot to say that I miss drinking coffee so much! I was known locally as the Mocha Queen and me email address has "Mocha Diva" in it. But I'm too afraid to drink coffee right now because I have such a hard time sleeping sometimes, and I also have bouts of anxiety that I'm afraid would be worse with the caffeine, (BIG) sigh...
Cindy
Cindy
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