Hi ladies,

I am 44 and been in peri for likely 4 years now. The last year has just really taken its toll on me to the point where I run from every camera I see...because...each time a picture is taken someone has to bring it to my attention about "My but you do look exhausted" or "Are you okay hon.....". This is not helping out an already down mum of three. Everywhere I go......someone has to tell me or ask me how I am feeling. This is really causing some serious depression now and I do not even want to go out anymore. I started peri with panic attacks and struggled for a year to gain control where I could go out and socialize like a normal person again. Now I just want to run and hide.

((((BIG HUGS))))
I'm also 44...and i also always look tired and hear comments....i'll run and hide with ya....

Oh that would be wonderful....thank you so much for making me smile. Does it get better? Doctor wanted me to take injections to shut down my ovaries.....I resisted and now wondering if it was the right decision.

What???

You made the right decision-unless you are genetically at risk from ovarian or breast cancer.
I had my ovaries removed in March 2006-didn't have a choice as I had uterine cancer. I would not wish the aftermath of that surgery on my worst enemy. I was not allowed HRT afterwards as my cancer was hormonally driven. It has been the worst three years of my life.
I am just now beginning to get over the hot flushes and anxiety. I recently was given a low dose hormone patch which made me really ill so not everyone can do HRT.
If you are feeling and looking tired then-sorry that is no reason to shut down your ovaries.
Peri is a horrid time and in my opinion there are no short cuts. If you keep your ovaries functioning they will still be sending out low doses of essential hormones during peri and after menopause.
I mourn the loss of my ovaries every day. They were healthy but I had to have them removed along with my uterus in case any cancer cells migrated.
Please try to take peri in your stride without any drastic measures. There are lots of lovely ladies here to support you and the site is full of information about every aspect of menopause

janet c

Hi, I also look exhausted. I have resorted to wearing more makeup to hide the dark circles around my eyes!! If I don't wear mascara and eye-liner, I look like I have got 'piggy eyes':(

Hugs
Jackie

[quote name='Medium at Large' date='May 30 2009, 12:28 PM' post='287388']
Hi ladies,

I am 44 and been in peri for likely 4 years now. The last year has just really taken its toll on me to the point where I run from every camera I see...because...each time a picture is taken someone has to bring it to my attention about "My but you do look exhausted" or "Are you okay hon.....". This is not helping out an already down mum of three. Everywhere I go......someone has to tell me or ask me how I am feeling. This is really causing some serious depression now and I do not even want to go out anymore. I started peri with panic attacks and struggled for a year to gain control where I could go out and socialize like a normal person again. Now I just want to run and hide.


Hello, Do you have any other symptoms other than panic attacks? Did you have a tubaligation? As far as how you look, I can relate because people always ask me if I am sick because I lost so much weight because of the stress and after gaining a little back, I think the stress of this has caused me to look exhausted. I know how you feel when people comment...

Kim

Nothing worse then to be told by people that you either look tired or "you don't look well".. I tend to avoid my photo being taken nowadays too.
Like jackie, I slap on a bit more make up..

Add me to the list...I haven't been told that but I think I look tired...heck I feel tired!!

I was told that for years too, especially by my mother. Once I started taking HRT though, it stopped. Either that or going gluten free. Whatever it was, I'm grateful. I never knew what to say to that comment.

I would tell those making such insensitive remarks....."right back at you or why ever would you say such a thing?" geez, people can be soooo insensitive!

Just an observation: my only sister is 10 years older than me and for years, I thought she has always looked soooo tired.....just passed it off as being a single mom, stress of finances, etc....but never actually said anything...

She's 60 now and not looking as tired and now I've just turned 50 and I"M looking tired all the time!!!! Guess it's the menopause devil that does it in our family!! LOL

Greatw, I gotta wait 10 years to look like I'm rested again ???

Dear'Medium at Large'
Do not run and hide.You have had a tough year as have many.I wish people would be more sensitive.As if it is any of their business in the first place!
All these feelings can lead to anxiety and then onto depression if not held in checked.You know what a good person you are so treat yourself kindly,enjoy some socialising .And if anyone mentions the 'tired look' again say "Funny I was just going to ask you that"

It will pass
Have confidence in yourself and all your friends and supporters here on this Site.

Warm Wishes
Elizabeth

Do you have any idea what it is like to feel like you look pretty good and only to go to work and someone say...."oh, do you feel ok? You look so tired". Self esteem...........right in the toliet.

Thank you so much girls for your thoughts ! You honestly get up in the morning and think..."My God I am alone here". But apparently not so. Two days now wanting to disappear into a flood of tears for no good reason! Its insanity. Called and made an appointment to see a specialist at the local womens health clinic. They got me in on a cancellation for tomorrow so it is meant to be! I am glad now I did not have the ovarian shutdown done. Had a hysterectomy at the age of 30 so have no clue what phase of meno I may currently be in. Be nursing a migraine since Thursday and anxiety over the moon. I am so hopeful that I can get some answers and some relief. Thanks again ladies!!!

I had a phase where everyone was saying that to me, and I just wanted to SLAP them! Like their comments are supposed to make us feel better?

Another thing I noticed is that the same people who told me I "looked awful," or "looked exhausted," never offered to help! They never said, "oh, you have a lot going on in your life; is there anything I can do to help out?"

Once at my church, a group of women were carrying on about how "worn out" I looked, and then one added, "Don't forget we'll need two homemade pies for the bake sale Friday!"

As you can see, you've opened a can of worms!

JJ

P.S. - I think for me, it's because I used to bleed so heavily, I was always anemic. Iron pills helped!

Add me to the list too! I'm 58 now but I spent a few years feeling very tired ( lack of sleep due to night sweats ) and exhausted. Coming to an end now as I feel it's slowly subsiding....but it was a LONG journey. It gets very annoying when you know you are tired and people keep telling you what you already feel!! Hang in there! Love and hugs Antique X

Yes that stinks!!!

Ha Ha!! Yes! I get the same thing in the organization I volunteer with! You look exhausted.....we volunteer you to run the next fundraiser. Yeah right! lol

Welcome to PS. You are not alone....exhaustion is my middle name sometimes. Hope you feel better soon.