I'm in menopause as some of you may have already read, and have recv'd So much great support that I wanted to vent here again in hopes of some advice;

I have been a single mom for all of my son's 24 years - he is an amazing person, highly gifted, honors grad student, on and on, but since he moved back home a year ago I am at the point were I cannot tolerate anything he does! This is a kid where I looked forward to seeing every day, to being someone who's eating habits, behaviors (the gas he emits is heinous) to his not working to the bills mounting the groceries we go through in a week... the day to day irritations are eating at me for some reason now and its going to ruin our relationship I'm sure of it.

I have financially supported my son by myself all through is growing years, through college, the three years he lived away from home (I paid all those bills too) and now he's with me working toward his MBA and is upset with me that I'm not proud enough of his accomplishments and instead nag about "the unimportant stuff" - I know I'm doing this because of the bigger issue that he needs to be out on his own again, but could this AWFUL menopause be making matters worse? I used to be able to just keep my opinions to myself and keep pouring the money out, but now I feel taken advantage of and express myself poorly with him, sometimes saying things that I know are hurtful - what can I do???!!!!

I can tell you that I myself have fealt the same way about every member of my famliy at some time or another during all my crazy hormonal shifts.Their breathing, chewing even talking would send me into orbit.I know that it can be caused by hormones but I also know stress helps it along the way too.I also found that if something was really bothering me and I chose not to say it than I would be irritated by the person for days, so one good thing that came out of peri crap is speaking my mind.I mean after all as a MOM we take alot of crap ( sorry if too blunt ) but it's true we are the great fixer, healer, savers for our families and sometimes we just need to take off our cape and say ENOUGH So i know where you are coming from and maybe their has been a storm brewing for quite some time and with the lack of hormones or too much hormone ( we never know in peri ) you just can't keep it all in anymore and that's ok !!
Hope things get better soon,
T

push the little birdie out of the nest !!! fly fly , good luck

((((BIG HUGS)))) i understand exactly what you're going through,my 22 yr. old is currently living back with us and it is a hard adjustment.I love him dearly but when they're that age they really do need to be on their own.....and menopause doesn't help the situation,it only makes things worse.I'm at a stage where i need to focus on myself and what i want and having a grown child in the house is just too much.

I would never let my kids move back in. They come home for a day and I am ready to send them home. I have a 15 year old daughter that of course lives here and we have a great relationship. But on the same weeks hers and my hormones are going ......LOL...My poor husband. But my three older ones. let them come home for a family event and I can't wait for the day to be over.

I think that is normal. they have there lives and now that they are older we can not show them the way or tell them how to behave, they are there own people. Plus once they move out they learn there own ways on some things and just forgot what we taught them.

I am not sure if what your going through is hormonal or just mothering.

My best to you