Ok well, I had been debating weither or not I was going to post about my feelings.I decided it might make me feel better...
Well I am currently nursing student.This last semester has been beyond hell for me with the overwhelming stress from school and the crazy anxiety, terrible PMS, crazy cycles, intense sadness and depression, horrible irritibility and night sweats , 3 kids , husband and 3 dogs,I have no clue how I made it through..Jesus must have carried me.Well, I took my last final today.I had 3 this week and I passed them all.I only have three classes left and I will graduate with my R.N. and I feel nothing but deep, dark sadness I should be so happy and grateful but I just feel awful.This week has been a terrible one for me as far as anxiety and irritability and I figured that I would feel so relieved that I had passed and was moving on but I dont feel relieved at all my weight still feels so heavy on my shoulders...WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME ? WHY CAN'T I FEEL HAPPY..I SHOULD BE ECSTATIC...instead I just want to crawl inside my closet, shut the door behind me and never face the world again.I just want to disappear...

You've had a tremendously gigantic load that you have been carrying for a very long time!! Try to let up on yourself for a bit. You have done a tremendous job, but at the same time, I don't think we were created to carry such a load for such a long period of time. That is unless you are a camel!

Take it easy for a while, if you can. And if you can't................do it anyway!!!

Sounds to me like you are shutting down, which is all very normal for someone who thinks she is a camel, but is not!

Take care of yourself. You are the only you that your family has.

Oh!! And congratulations on such a fine job in school! Take yourself out to dinner! Get outa that desert!

Big Hugs,

bev

I am so sorry that you're feeling this way. But, hang on for better days ahead. You have accomplished a most amazing thing in spite of not feeling well and taking care of a family. I am very proud of your accomplishment finishing school. Now take the time to regroup, rest. Have you talked to your docs about the peri symptoms? And, try to enlist the family in helping you get some time for you to rest and recover from this past semester. Rest, and remember you are not alone in this. Best wishes, JZZ

Big congratulations to you. Now try not to worry about how you are feeling. You have just gone through a major life event and now are facing graduation and all that looms ahead. Don't forget that stress doesn't have to be bad in order to have it affect us. There is a let down too once school is over. Many college kids feel it after graduation so why shouldn't you! Your life is about to change - that is stressful. Not to worry - so normal. Pat yourself on the back and go with whatever feelings arise. They are OK - truly and so are you.

Dor

((((((t nikki)))))))))

It sounds like you have been holding everything in and in place for a long time so now that you are through with finals, you are letting it go and your body and mind are reacting to all of it. It will pass and you will feel better.

Take care of yourself!

Jeaninne