hi everyone........ I just had to post this tonight, i just had to vent a little..... I can't get over the fact that nowadays, no matter what is "wrong" with me, which are mainly peri symptoms, I become very fearful. I know all about the health anxiety thing, and i'm loaded with it, but I just can't believe how deep this goes! If I had had any of these symptoms years ago, i wouldn't have taken them so seriously! But today, i do. So, whether it's a bad headache, temple pressure, off balance, weird feelings in the ovaries, full bladder feeling......you name it (oh, and lately i've been dealing with this stupid tooth abscess, that NOW, I"m afraid will go to my brain! see, this is what i mean, and I'm taking amoxicillin for it.....and still, I am in such a state of panic over it!!!!) .... this is really to much! I know myself enough to know, that had i been dealing with this years ago, i would never have been so worried and fearful .............


Maybe this is because at this time of life, our own mortality becomes rather real to us...whereas before, when we were younger, it just didn't hit us as to how things can happen.......I don't know! UGH!

anyway, thanks for listening...............

I know exactly how you feel 'mydarling' as I'm the Queen, no the Emporess of FEAR these days. It seems I have one thing after another piling up on top of me and I'm not coping at all with any of it. In fact I'm feeling so overwhelmed in it all that I just wish I could hibernate till it's all over then emerge a beautiful innocent butterfly.

I could kind of cope with the old anxiety and lightheadedness that's been with me 24/7 for over 3 yrs but this new high anxiety/panic, spacy lighthead, throat and chest tightness, GERD is just getting all too much. I never have a good day anymore not even half a good day here or there and I'm just so tired of it. I have my first grand child due to be born in 10 weeks time and I so want to be feeling better by then but I'm not holding my breath for that miracle as I'm likely to be diappointed. So I just take each day as it comes and look forward to the late evening when I sometimes feel a little more relaxed and if sleep is going to bless me that night then that's an even bigger bonus cos then I get a few hours of reprieve from this suffering. It's the mornings I hate the most as this is when high anxiety kicks in, not immediately upon waking which is very early of late but about 20 mins or so after waking when I just can't switch off those annoying what if thought's that race around my head all day every day.

For me I don't think it's worrying about my own mortality that is what I fear most, but the thought of being like this or worse for the rest of my life is what scares me the even more.

Dear'my darling'
I think you raised a salient point regarding our awareness of our own mortality.It is not easy to make the transition from relatively young and carefree to older and more worried about our health.
The best way I find to deal with it is to keep busy,up the exercise and just try to enjoy those good moments.

There are a lot of maturer women out there living productive lives and I think we can all eventually reach that place too.It takes time,patience and an acceptance of who we are today.I remember my tiny,bubbly little grandmother wall papering the walls at the ripe old age of 92.then it was off for a walk to visit her younger sister-aged 87 and play cards..She walked everywhere for at least two hours. She finally passed on aged 94,sound in mind.

So take heart things do get better as we take this journey together.

God Bless
Elizabeth

Your Royal Highness!

Take heart my friend.Honestly things do get better by time.There will be many milestones .
You will make an awesome Grandma.I have three grandchildren and although quite exhausting,they are lots of fun and their innocence infectious.

Do you take anything for your anxiety?It might be well worth talking things over with your Doctor if it gets really unbearable.

Do not forget we are all in this together and we rely on you to 'roxoursocks'

Warm Hugs
Elizabeth

Hey,
What are you all doing up at that time of night? I couldn't believe the time you were all on!!!

Well, I know we've all been in touch with the same things going on. Where did the footloose and fancy free women we once were go? I would be up for any adventure, now I am afraid to drive even an hour away in case I feel "off", driving or when I get there. It is awful to never feel like yourself, or waking up feeling good and waiting for the shoe to drop, saying, well, I hope the day is good, but maybe I won't feel well. Even after a million tests and knowing I am fine, I dont' always feel fine. This peri thing is awful. I never would have believed three years ago that I would have turned into this person and I really really can't wait for it to be over.

Hang in there guys, it's got to get better. It just has to. Lets keep in touch in the meantime. Have a great day, let's think positive.

I went through the whole thing--dwelling on my mortality, having all sorts of scary physical symptoms, sure I was going to die soon. It lasted unabated for about a year and a half. I felt like I was barely hanging on to sanity. While I'm feeling much more normal lately, both physically and mentally, every so often that whole thing rears it's ugly head again for a short time (compared to it always being ever-present before) Or I can be feeling normal and then this fear wells up in me with a vivid memory of my constant state of fear and symptoms, and I can physically feel a fear of it all returning.

Since getting things balanced in my body--thyroid, adrenals, estrogen--I am having many days of steady energy, feeling more like my old self, not dwelling on death. I am convinced that hormonal and chemical imbalances in our body affect our thinking processes, and it takes more than mind over matter to regain a normal thinking process and a sense of calmness free of worry and fear.

I have had a very difficult time making the transition (as you said) from being young and healthy and not worried about death, to coming to terms with my own mortality and the effects of aging on my body. I was always healthy, and all the horrific physical symptoms hit me all at once like a ton of bricks and blindsided me. There was no gradual easing into being older, it was like it literally happened overnight. Very, very scary and unsettling.

I think what made it worse is that I've always been considered attractive and had a nice figure. Sadly, I didn't realize how much that had become an important part of my self esteem, and now that it's all fading, and men look through me instead of at me, I am scrambling to find other things to give meaning to my life, which was difficult when I had absolutely zero motivation and energy to do anything. But now there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I'm hopeful that I can reinvent myself and look at this second half of my life as a wonderful opportunity to go in a new direction.

Wow what a great topic to post and knowing that I am not the only one going through this is refreshing . if that is possible with all of this.

I was diagnosed with MAV last year and while I have got that to a somewhat manageable level the rest of the symptoms that seems to be elevated to a level that is out of control. I am convinced that the anexty that goes along with all of this sends us into a diminson that many of us have never experinced before in our lives.

I find myself fearful every time there is a new twitch, bump, sensation where as in the past i probably never even noticed that it was there or for heavens sake it was a big deal.

This has been the worst for me over the last few months as my husband thinks I have really lost it at times , although he is very supportive he can not understand every time I get upset when the least little thing with my body changes.

For me the worst part is I have too much time on my hands to worry as before my illness last year I was very active , worked everyday and I guess I just did not have time to dwell on every minor change with my body. But now I can no longer work so I have a lot of time on my hands. So the mind goes off in directions it never has in the past.

May we all learn to remain calm in these storms and know that one day they will pass and the sun will be shinning on the other side , in the meantime we can support each other and weather the storms together!

I agree with the "let's stay in the positive" although at TIMES, it is extremely difficult. One thing I wanted to add is that we can never go back to square one with all of this anxiety and stuff. We know too much about how to combat it. Sometimes it gets mired down in all the negative thoughts and crazy body symptoms, but for me remembering that it goes in cycles really helps to get me out of it.
Plus it has been going on in spurts for about 3 years now and again in cycles so it has to be hormonal.
I too, never thought it could hit overnight but it did, literally.
I have had to reinvent myself, leave some old friendships behind and form new friendships, and somehow find the strength to exercise when I felt like crap.
We will all be okay, I guess this is the part of life that no one likes to talk about, but you wish they would've given you some warning!!! My Mom acts like if she doesn't talk about it then it didn't happen!!!! My sister and I just chuckle between us now, we have each other, plus all of the wonderful insight here!
Hope everyone has a better day, or if your day is already good, let it CONTINUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I had a sister to talk to this about. Lucky you. I have very good friends who have some of this, but I feel like the complainer who really was hit hard, so I have nowhere to go but here. And that is a great thing. I have found such wonderful women here, and they have made it possible to get through the day. I honestly dont' know where I would be without them. I feel so fortunate to have stumbled upon this site. I thank dearest for giving us this chance to connect with others going through the same thing, so we dont' feel so lonely. Yes, I try to think positive but it is a difficult task, one that requires alot of time and energy.

i hope everyone has a good day too.

You guys have put into words things I have been feeling but didn't know how to express. Today is S H A K I N G day, AGAIN! Of course with the shaking the anxiety, frustration, patience, etc is bad. I went 2 days without it but here it is again. It makes it hard to be positive but I have to agree with the cycle and hormone thing. Nothing different about today or yesterday or the day before, so why the shaking today? It must be the hormones that are different. Just have to get through the day and see what tomorrow brings--this is another cycle! Trying very hard today to hang in there.
WE CAN GET THROUGH THIS STUFF, WE HAVE TO!

Wow, I just really don't no what to say?Will it get worse for me with time?I am just starting into my 30's & I have huge fears of everything. I fear awful things happening to my husband, awful things happening to me, I fear going places alone, I can't even grocery shop on my own anymore?Heck, the anxiety was so bad for awhile, it was a chore figuring out what to make for dinner & to cook it OH MY!I am 31 years old??????I take an anxiety med, an AD & I started a mood stabilizer, it seems to be helping me. I can at least go places on my own. Before, my feet were nailed to the floor if anything was asked of me that I had to do by myself. I still feel really depressed & not wanting to do much. If it gets worse with time, I am in big trouble. I try my hardest to be okay for my family. I'm just really rushing spring and summer, hoping this will lift my spirits. I'm so thankful for this group!
Amber

My darling:

I cant believe you posted about this!!! Today!!!

I have been stressing so much over this house thing that I thought it would kill me with a heart attack. So my health anxiety has been sky high lately.

I am also dealing with something in my teeth. I am not sure if it is infected or if I am gritting my teeth or what the heck is happening. All I know is that I am scared half out of mind because I will have to see a dentist to find out. Of all the doctors in the whole world, I am scared of the dentist the most. The last time I went was 10 years ago and had to have two teeth pulled. Is that bad or what?

Anyway, I am wondering if I am overreacting and just have been gritting my teeth and that is why I am experiencing pain on the top and bottom. I keep telling myself that the odds of two teeth getting infected and hurting at the same time are slim but will my mind accept that? NOOOOOOOO it wont.

I am sorry that this is happening to you.
(((((((((mydarling))))))))))))

Jeaninne

I share the same experiences lately. I have these weird shaky days and lately I get twitches in my legs too (like an eye twitch in my lower legs). It concerned me enough to go to my GP. She said to increase Ca and Mg. I am hoping it works since I work in dentistry and I can't be shaky and unstable all day. I only feel calm and together for about 3 days each cycle. Not nearly enough! Fight and Forge ahead!!!

I have a sister who is 5 years older and she has been pretty much useless through this whole process. My sister is the denial type. She has even had elevated BP and she just goes on. I have stopped talking to her about it.

Hi,
Just recent had what sounds like same thing with teeth!!couldnt really tell which tooth it was coming from,thought was getting an abcess,was waiting for pain to become excruciating,which it never did,instead the pain started travelling along the rest of my teeth,finally going into my jaw,which resulted in jaw popping out and locking?pain then went into shoulder,neck and back,lasted a few weeks in all.Teeth never bothered me since(amazingly)it,s just the rest of my body.It was very weired,how can teeth hurt one minute then pass?But it seems there are NO rules for this PERI saga.
Hope yours too passes without Dentist visit
KathS x

I just did a new post regarding pretty much the same as what you are saying here and what the ladies have responded to. I guess we have to chalk it up to the mystical magical crappy @$$ wheel of menopause symptoms, it turns and turns where it lands no one knows. OMG, seriously what's a woman to do? For me the anxiety/potential panic attacks are the worse. I can handle having to hibernate for a time, I can handle not shopping, I can handle pampering myself when need be, I can handle letting some things go, wearing the same clothes for 2 days in a row, lol, ...I just can't stand the health anxiety, anxiety in general and mostly panic.... I hate the panicky feeling and the health anxiety fear the most. Someone tell me (I know you have said if before but I need to hear it again) that this will eventually end and I will feel good again. My life is a good life with good people, I just found my laughter again after many years of no laughter. I am 50 years old, have been experiencing hormonal stuff for many years now, it's been manageable up until now, now it's changing my day to day experience. I am lucky to have a husband who adores me and lets me be when I need to be and takes care of the stuff I just don't want to take care of. On my good days, I make it up to him, lol... I just hope that I get to keep those far and few between good days so he remembers why the heck he married me, lol

Hey KathS:

Thank you for your kind words. I am glad to know that I am not alone. I have had the travelling pain in my teeth too and just cant believe the kind of crap we tolerate during peri. My teeth have finally settled down but now, my gum is hurting and feels raw. I am still trying to not go to the dentist.

Hugs,
Jeaninne

Mich:

It will end! It has to because we need to look forward to something positive out of all this. I dont even want to think about it being like this for the rest of my days!!!!! I, like you, hate the anxiety more than anything else. I can deal with all the other stuff but the anxiety is my monster under the bed and it is constantly jumping out at me.

I hope that you are feeling better.
Hugs to you,
Jeaninne

Ladies, I'm so glad someone posted about this today because I'm about at my wit's end with anxiety. I am going on 55 and two years post-meno, and I thought all this would be over with by now. Instead, I think I must be on some kind of delayed timing with the peri symptoms. It doesn't seem like there are ever two good days in a row when it comes to freedom from anxiety. I feel like I am on such a roller coaster, and, like many of you, feel like everything I have is fatal; or, if it's not, I will just worry myself to death. Any tips on how to stay positive through all this? I pray and I work and exercise and try to stay busy, but somedays the anxiety just wins out. I think my husband, too, thinks I am some kind of hypochondriac or am "losing it". Do men not get any mid-life symptoms, or do they just ignore theirs?

You could have taken the words right out of my mouth with the anxiety stuff. The shaking stuff is bad for me too. I went to my granddaughters birthday party today with some shaking/anxiety but made it through. Then it all stopped and I felt better so I decided to go to the store. Half way through..WHAM. Shaking started again, had anxiety attack starting. I ended up leaving with only half the shopping done and cried all the way home. Right now I feel a little better but it wouldn't take much to start crying again over nothing much. As for staying positive, it's hard some days isn't it? I just pat myself on the back when I do the dishes, vacuum or accomplish something that I wasn't sure I could do that day. I know these are just daily things that need to be done but they seem so hard to do lately. So I say if you even brush your teeth, pat yourself on the back!

Dear'aginggracefully'I
I too am post menopaause but was since the age of 39!
Middle aged is however both distinct and yet connected with this stage in our lives.We face our mortalityWe do not have the boundless energy etc.so these feelings of anxiety are with us all so remember you are not suffering alone.You are not a hypochrondriac.I think this is how men like to label us as they cannot comprehend what we are going through.

I do believe that there is a Male Menopause but it sems to come on more quietly and with a lot more dignity than we are afforded.!

It sounds like you are doing all the right things to keep yourself as calm as possible.I take a small dosage of Xanax,as needed,when I feel I am very uptight and nervous.It works well and I have never abused or upped the dose.There is a school of thought amongst Psychiatrists that Xanax taken in a small dose twice a day for about two weeks cuts the cycle of anxiety.Then very slowly you begin to wean off until you probably find a lot of the anxiety will be gone.Then you either stop the Xanax entirely or take a small dose as needed. if the anxiety rears its ugly head again.

Of course,I am not a Doctor and you must discuss all information this with yours.There are also some Herbal preparations that are supposedly very successful in treating into high levels of anxiety but of course you would need to discuss these with your Pharmacist.

Whatever you decide to do I wish you lots of luck and blessings.Have been there and it is very emotionally painful.Do not give up looking for answers.You deserve to live your life with quality and not fear

Please keep us posted
You are in my Prayers tonight.

Warm Wishes
Elizabeth

Hi to all,
Just reading these posts,I,m up there with you all on this health anxiety,should be getting a GOLD medal soon for it!! Where the heck does it come from?is it hormone related?or is it just all these crazy symptoms piling upon us which in turn trigger health anxiety?? There is a "worse symptom list"somewhere on here and it seems majority of us list it High as the worse thing to deal with.
I,ve posted on it,as i was reading i was laughing soooo much through hysteria (i think)i have bouts of laughing hysterically then sobbing episodes as i read of all you lovely women being so open,and i can relate so much to this awful fairground ride we are on,but then the anxiety creeps in and i,m off again
I,m not just happy with diagnosing myself ALL my family have to endure this crazy symptom of mine.Ive had my partner down with sceptecemia,pneumonia and scarlett fever all in a DAY how irrational is that??
Mine came to a head when i had a pain in my left boob my brain went into SERIOUS overdrive It was like a dark cloud hanging over me couldnt think of anything else. 3 Dr,s visits later blood tests,examinations and i still get uneasy now,but then a new symptom started(or was it a symptom?)an awful squeezing of my heart,had it a few times very unnerving,and i will go get it checked when i pluck up the courage.
on a good day i think oh another symptom then on a bad day my brain wont even go into positive mood,it takes me somewhere dark and it scares me,ive never been like this would shrug off any ache or pain,but not now.
I don,t know if i think "how is it possible for hormones to cause so much mentally and physically" so i then pressume it "MUST" be something awfully wrong with me!
Anyone else understand where i,m at? silly question really............
hugs and smiles K