Let me first start out by saying thanks for this site! I am new here. After typing in the words "depression/Rage" I was directed to this site! I am 37 and full of Rage! I had a TAH/BSO back in 2003. On Premrin for HRT. Rage is a mild term to describe how I am feeling. EVERYDAY. With in these last 6 months or so it has become far worse than expected. Daily I feel like I am spending most of the day keeping my emotional beast in the cage for fear that I can hurt someone! I have a husband who has 2 kids. One living with us. I have 3 of my own and a brother that I raised now in College. I can tell ya that it has been but for the grace of God that they are all still in one piece. I don't want them talking, walking, eating, laughing, or breathing. It ALL makes me nuts! Now I have not always been like this, in fact the complete opposite. I have always been out going, life of the party, and everbody's best friend! Now I want nothing to do with anyone. Often....ok all the time, I am mocking my husband behind his back for not being smart enough, or fast enough, or assertive enough, or too assertive. He is a very mild man, so I even go as far as blaming him for being such an easy target of my outbursts. You need an example? Yesterday he washed my car. Did a great job and I was very pleased for the moment. However, driving my car to work this morning, I noticed this kinda rattle coming from the trunk area. Once at work, I went to investigate this "rattle" that had me cussing all the way to the office. Anyway, I pop the trunk and BLAM instant RAGE! My husband didn't put the crate that holds the glass cleaner and other cleaning items back in my truck. So my next thoughts are ones that I just assume not even type out, but use your imagination, and understand that every cuss word was used! These kind of outbursts can go on all night! Children: the same..they left the cup on the table, didn't take their shoes off and put them in the "right" place. Didn't jump when told to...so on and so on and so on! I am feeling tons of guilt since somewhere inside I know that I am being a bitch and I just can't stop it. Even when I calm myself down enough to understand that it will pass, something happens that puts me right back to the rage stage! I have headaches, brain f**ts, weight gain, anger, sorrow, weird dreams, no dreams (lack of sleep) the list goes on~ I am one angry bitch that needs some advice....got any? thanks in advance

Dear Four3nme,
Wow, this sounds like me right after I had my baby at 40. I was a raging mess. I almost went fist to cuffs with a guy who came out and yelled at me for accidentally turning around in his driveway. I had my baby in the back and a friend in the car with me. I had really been having a time where my emotions were all over the board. It scared the heck out of me. I didn't even recognize myself. Anyway, this huge dude runs after my car, screaming at me and I stepped on the breaks and got out of the car while he was yelling and clenching his fists. I walked right up to him and got inches into his face and screamed right back and even called him a few of my own choice names. It blew him away that this little 5'3" baracuda/badger was unleashing hell on him. I would have fought him to the ground I tell ya. He backed down and I walked back to my car, but was really upset that I put myself and my baby and my friend in danger. After that I called my doc and I was put on an anti depressant. Literally, within a few weeks, that horrible rage and agression was gone. Thank God. Every once in a while I get that crazy, irratated, can't stand anyone, can't stand noise, heat, clutter and anything when I realize that this is midlife hormones. Recognize it for what it is and don't make ANY rash decisions, moves, changes until it passes. It also helps to work out and cut back on cafeine. Your in good company here, trust me......it's not just YOU. Debra

It sounds like your hormones are not working for you. I would suggest trying plain estradiol, premarin is a synthetic and can cause problems for many. Also, you most likely need a higher dose. When was the last time you had a blood test for estradiol levels? Estradiol has helped me and others to not have those rages.

I would ask your doc to change your Rx to Vivelle dot or Divigel, which are bioidentical. They are also applied transdermally and have less side effects.

I can TOTALLY relate!! My episodes usually occur around PMS time. Same thing---the sound of my hubby's breathing makes me insane!!! Thankfully for my family----i say everything I am thinking in my head. If the words were spoken--they would have me comitted! I curse like a sailor when I am alone---just to get it out. Luckily it usually passes after a few days----but i feel sorry for anybody that doesn't agree with me during that time!

Oh you are by far not alone. We're all out here just waiting for you to join us.
I had to smirk when I read you post, not because it is in the lest bit funny, but because I could totally relate to everything you said. Sometimes, the rage that I feel inside scares me and I want to be as far away from everyone as I can get cuz I don't trust my mouth or my actions. I would NEVER harm my children, but can't promise the same with the SO. I love him dearly and he does his best to understand, but even that getst under my skin when the mood is just so. I see my Dr. on the 6th of April and I can't wait cuz I'm physically wearing myself out trying to keep control of myself. The last thing I want to do is hurt my loved one's feelings, especially since they really don't undertand any of this.

I know exactly how you feel. My husband works nights and sleeps most of the day and I love it because that's less time I have to see him, hear him, etc., etc. I feel guilty for saying that, but it's the truth. My feelings of rage are usually only directed at him. Poor man. I did start using Progesterone cream last week and I'm feeling MUCH LESS anger. I'm a lot calmer and things that used to make me crazy are no longer having any effect on me. I'm sure he's noticed it also, but he hasn't said anything. He's probably afraid to rock the boat.

Just want you to know, you're not alone.

I have issues with rage and laugh about it . No I really do. I loved reading the first post because that is sooo ME.Menopause has been the gift that makes it possible for me to not put up with bs anymore.Before meno I'd just take it and stuff it somewhere ending up with aches, pains and stress related health issues. I'm at a point in life that I pity the fool especially if he's male that thinks he's gonna start up with me. I cut women a little more slack when they're angry because usually its because they're not feeling good or under pressure.I don't like it and will deal with them if they go out of their way to confront me without provocation but men, thats another story.Where I live it's tourist season right now, it's like a frickin nightmare just trying to do the simplest task in my car. Anyway some of these male tourists are really brazen & cocky as though they've come to FL, expected to be serviced and accomodated for at every juncture while having left any shred of intelligence they might have had back home. Maybe they're just used to women "taking it" when they're dishing it out but they've learned a nice new lesson when they come to FL and decide to act like ridiculous morons screaming at the locals who must live and work around the whole mess that they are.Sure I feel bad for about 5 seconds because I know I'm gonna blow a gasket but I **** it up and then I go after after them.
Truthfully I feel soooooooo much more relaxed afterwards and I really don't care what they think.
Besides the wrinkles , aches and pains in the morning and a little extra beef around my midsection I'm liking this whole getting older thing.Theres gotta be a few benefits to it it too , huh?
I like to think of it as rage being just one more service that I offer