I am at a complete breakdown I think. I don't know what the ....is happening to me, I am coming emotionally unglued. This has been a very diificult period....I am extremely tired, dizzy and have relentless palpitations which have literally drove me to the brink of my sanity. Everything just keeps getting worse. I get a teaser of what life would be like if all this were gone and then wham the flood gates open worse tan before. After another tough day with all of this my 19 year old son is busy sporting his new shoes wondering how he looks.... I reply gee I am having another awful day and do you think you could help me clean up no you guys just keep piling dishes on top of dishes, can't for your life put in a new garbage bag, its all you , you, you. Mind you I didn't yell I made a statement, well my son struggles to be open minded and instead of think ing yeah mom could use some help he proceeds to tell me I complain all the time, to get a bleepen life and all I do is sit around the house at the top of his lungs......i should have known better but struggled to walk away as I am sooooooooo tired of being made to feel like I am a crazy woman by people in my family(my husband is very good to me and daughter and mother, but the rest don't get it) I start to walk away as this is spewing from his mouth...I feel such rage, I am already tetering because of the way I feel(no excuse) I am heading to the bedroom and grab my daughters 20 question ball on the way, I can't take what is being said anymore and fling it.....well it hits the tv...I am standing there stunned because this is a 1600.00 tv hanging on th wall. I can't believe what I just did. I have to call my husband and tell him....he is too kind and just says it can be fixed, our son needs ot move out if he isn't going to be part of the solution and I am more concerned with you, he said he doesn't want to have to start being afraid to go to work and leave me alone. He said I have made comments lately that are concerning him he asked if he needs to take them seriously.....have I gotten to the point where people are concerned, am I really losing whats left of my mind?

He keeps telling me it is just a bad time right now and it will pass and I said yeah pass only to return in 2 weeks, if it even passes this time it just seems extra long. It just gets worse and worse...I do nothing, my son is right. I can't work, I can't drive due to the spontanious dizziness. I do the housework and yardwork and paint. I have no social life, I am alone most of the day and yes very lonely. My body is so tense I hurt everwhere....I can't fix this and it is destroying me. I try to help others here, but feel like a hypocryte.. I can't even help myself. I try to live my life with these feelings anyway knowing this could take years to get through and I fail miserably. I just cry, sob is more the right word....I can't beleive I have lost this much control over my body. thanks for the ears or should I say eyes.....HUGS MIkki

I really feel for you. I just came out of a bad spell myself. Of course, I don't have any mouthy kids around the house which I'm sure would fray the last nerve I'm running on too.

Take a deeeep breath. In fact take a few deep breaths, slowly and steadily.

YOU ARE NOT CRAZY.

Are you on any kind of meds that may be making your symptoms worse? Have you had your thyroid checked lately? You'd be surprised how that little gland can go haywire at this time in our lives and wreak havoc on our emotions and heart rythyms. Many MD's just don't get it. I went through three doctors before one finally did the full panel bloodwork & found out I was on the low side.
As far as the dizziness--have you ever had middle ear problems? It could even be food or other allegies kicking in. Those, too, seem to get worse at this time.

I'll keep you in my prayers. Why not come to the chat room and talk with others who can understand what you're going through?

(((((((((((((((((sunflower))))))))))))))))))))

you are n ot crazy!!! This is a rough time and you need some help from your family. In my eyes, your son is lucky that you did not hit him with the ball. My kids can get mouthy from time to time but really cursing at you is just so wrong! I have bouts of anger and loneliness and all the crap goes with it from time to time too.

I agree with Bookworm, check your thyroid and go from there.
I am sorry you are having a bad day, it will get better.
Jeaninne

I have calmed a bit, but still very frustrated.....He is lucky isn't he that the ball didn't come his way.

I have had my thyroid checked a few times....I had a nurse practitioner tell me out of the blue at a visit (usually see the Dr.) that I could get symptoms from my levels because they fall on the end of being hyper...I think last time it was .8 something with a range of .4 - 4.7 or something close like that. it has been tested about 4x and the highest it ever was is 1.3

I do have allergies and I get migraines w/o eye pain so don't know if the dizzies come from that

I keep saying there is something making this worse, I just can't figure out what it is and I think the thing my husband is becoming afraid of is I am beginning to not care. I have ben dealing with these intense symptoms for 2 years and I am becoming worn out. I eat well, take vitamins and exercise have searched for ways to help myself and it seems I am beating my head. There just has to be more going on....I am not even thinking big, or scary but something maybe even so small that is just off that is making all of this worse...I don't know.....Thanks ladies Mikki

oops I mean with eye pain for migraines

Mikki, Wanted to send you a big hug. Know some of the feelings you are having. Take care! Pam

(((Mikki))) I feel for you, I really do. I know exactly what you mean. I have five boys and a girl, ranging from 26 to 13 and I get no help from them. The three older ones live away from home, the three younger boys live with me and my husband and they literally do nothing other than eat and play their computers - the older ones come home for dinner most nights. My husband tries to understand but really doesn't. I was made redundant after 21 years in the same job and was actually looking forward to having some spare cash and going out having fun - then this hit me at the same time. I'm now too scared to do any real housework that may involve a bit of elbow grease because it will set my palps off. I started a fitness regime and whilst I am losing the weight I don't want to exercise anymore because it makes me feel ill. I've thrown things in frustration too. I now refuse to be made to feel guilty for the way I feel. I can't help it. I don't want to be like this. I can't cope at the moment. I never thought I would ever say those words! I've always coped and just got on with stuff - juggling several things at once and working. I don't think I could work now even if the perfect job fell in my lap - I'd be a wreck! I AM A WRECK!

We are going through something pretty major and other than other women suffering the same thing no one has any idea how bad it really is. I remember a work colleague of mine ten years ago going through this at 46, she thought she was crazy and her body was doing weird things to her - I stuck by her although I didn't understand - luckily I did stick by her because she remembers I did and is now helping me even if its only talking. We need other women that are going through this to get through it. I don't know what I would do with out the ladies on this board. I come here often and read everything.

We have to remember we will get through this - look at all the old ladies out there that have! How we were ever described as the weaker sex amazes me!

(((Mikki))))
I really feel for you so much. I'm so sorry you're going through this again with your son\--I know how much you love him. I hope you can find a solution thats best for all of you.

Hang in there --



((((gentle hugs))))

Hi Mikki

I'm so sorry about your son...kids just don't get it, do they?!

I fully understand what you are feeling....I have struggled with my sanity since my daughter was born over 8yrs ago.....this exacerbated about 3 and a half years ago when peri hit and then my adrenals were stressed, night after night of hot flashes accompanied by heart palps scaring the living daylights out of me, unrelenting anxiety too.

My periods finally stopped last summer at age 47....so I've been 14 months w/out a period now....I actually thought things were improving from May as I started taking some herbal supplement and the night hotness went away....BUT started coming back about a month ago - 4 months of pure relief was beautiful!

Now they are back, but I just can't seem to cut out the wine in the eve and cut out sugars (as I know that would help) my willpower is zero!.....I'm also having slight dizzy spells...not REALLY bad, but annoying.

I haven't looked at your history...how old are you?....have you stopped your periods yet?...how long have you been getting these bad symptoms?

I do know that they will pass, as a lot of my worst symptoms have.

A couple of friends that are 52 and 45 have now just began getting night sweats....now I feel I am not alone in that anyway!!....and they now know why I was complaining so much over these last 3 years!

Can you find a support group in your area?....or a yoga/meditation class?

Keep reading the posts here to help you and get encouragement.

I wish you well.

Caz

I would insist on further bloodwork for your thyroid. My sister's is on the hyper side--it's called Graves Disease--and she's doing much better now that she was diagnosed. Her heart would race for no reason and that would throw her into panic attacks. After going to two cardioligists, the second one suggested an endocrinoligist for the thyroid. Bingo.