Well, here I am. I wish I found this site a few years back. I feel as though I just picked my head up out of the sand. I just turned 44 and have spent the last three years of my life in a panic/anxiety/depression mode. I wish I had been expecting these changes...I guess I thought I was too young. I've always been very in tune with my body. I have four children, first one at 17 and my last one at 38. My period has been like clockwork my entire life, so I've never been much of a "calendar girl" as far as keeping track. I had my last baby in February, 2003. I had a tubal, and although they say it doesn't cause any changes, I was never the same.

by the time she was six months old, I was being prescribed Provera to bring my period on. Then I went about a year like clockwork. I thought I just needed a jumpstart or something. That brought me to the fall of 2004. Between fall 2004 and summer 2006 I had periods off again, on again, every few months. They were much heavier than ever and sometimes I thought there was really something wrong. I kept my ob/gyn visits, but never really shared this info with the doctor except to say that I was a bit irregular. He explained that I was just "too young" to be thinking about perimenopause, so I just dismissed it. He also reassured me that the tubal had nothing to do with any of this.

From the beginning of 2007, or maybe around the holidays in 2006, I started to just spot lightly here and there. THEN came some of the weird symptoms I've been suffering with since:

-hot flashes
-night sweats
-dry mouth/weird taste in my mouth/burning tingling tongue
-major anxiety and paranoid thoughts about something being REALLY wrong with me
-weird dizzy spells where I wasn't really dizzy but felt like i would suddenly like FALL OVER but wouldn't
-insomnia
-headaches...and i've never really had headaches
-zero libido
-weight gain
-and then my personal favorite, tinnitus which started on june 15 2007....yes i remember that date since it DROVE ME CRAZY NONSTOP FOR OVER A YEAR

well, i never went to my gyn in 2007 (no time for me as usual) and just went last week. When they asked me when my last period was, I honestly had no answer to give. I remembered we went on vacation last October (2007), but couldn't remember how long before that I had had it. I know I haven't had it since then so i guess it's been a year.

He wrote me a prescription for Provera but told me not to fill it until the results of my hormone bloodwork came back. So, I waited...and waited. He called. Guess what?

MENOPAUSAL. what? what? how could i be so stupid! I thought I was dying of some weird disease all this time. And I am so frustrated that I have absolutelyNO IDEA when my last period was. So, does this mean I am postmenopausal? Am I still in the throws of the transition/menopause period? I still get hot flashes though they aren't severe, I notice them. I also get heart palpitations. My deep dark I'm not myself anymore depression seems to have improved, but I wish I had even considered menopause or maybe did a little research so I could have recognized all of these symptoms i didn't even know existed. I thought no period, hot flashes and irritability were all the signs there were.

Any ideas on how far along I am in this process? My ears used to ring so loudly 24/7 though most days i don't have that any more. I can't help but wonder if the depression and onset of anxiety and tngling mouth and tinnitus and headaches and allo the other signs started when my hormones really began to crash. On top of this, I guess I always thought since my mom and sister were both fifty when they reached menopause that I'd be the same. I mean...I must have started perimenopause as soon as I had that last baby at 38. why am I so much younger? Is that "same age as your mom" thing a myth?

Any insights would be so helpful, and I"m so happy that I'm not alone anymore. I didn't talk to ANYONE about these symptoms and had myself in a terrorized state for the past two years. I'm so glad I found all of you.

Mary I glad you found us too!


Your going to find out really FAST your not insane and you will no longer feel alone!

Also, I was under chronic stress since 2004 when I lost my dad. Then I got divorced, then I had job related stress (and tons of if). I've often wondered if all of this stress could have contributed to the changed. What are tired adrenals? I've read some things but don't really understand...my FSH was 79.9. Does this number indicate how far into "the process" you are?

Oh for heaven's sakes - you poor kid!!! I have so been there! I also had a tubal when I had my last (twins) and guess what it THREW ME HEADLONG INTO MENO!!! Your Doc is WRONG!!! I even had to sign a disclaimer for this in the hospital! It has to do with blood supply to the ovaries - not really sure of the reason - just sure of the result. Take heart, you are in the right place. ALL of your symptoms are meno (and the addtional stress CAN throw you into it as well)

Take good care and comfort in knowing you have just found some of the best friends you will ever make! That's the good part!

I should have added that I was also 38 at the time!

Hi Clueless Mary,
Welcome to Power-Surge. Like you I was about 38 when I started Preimenapause and the Doctor and Nurse said to me your too young.
Ha what do they know. My Mother was the same age as me when she started but since shes not here now I cant ask her what it was like for her.

Im now 42 nearly 43.

Last year I missed my first period and thought oh no Im pregnant but bloods told me I wasnt which was a great relief as my youngest is 10 years and I didnt want to go through having another baby at that age.

Your right about the Tennitus far out it can be bad. What I found a bit scary was the Heart Pulps. Ive only had one lot but they lasted for about 4 or 5 days. Im pleased they havent come back.

Stick around here and keep posting to let us know how you are doing.

Take care from Deb

(((peri/meno))) hug! You are NOT alone! I was 41 when this roller coaster started. I am now 47. I am not done yet. My gyn looked at me like I was nuts too. Want me to see a psychiatrist. Lovely huh!
You have all the classic symptoms.
I had my one and only baby at 38.
If it is any comfort to you, my ears are ringing right this moment.

Dear Mary,

Welcome, welcome to Power Surge!

In my much earlier years (I am now 56), my period disappeared for more than a year when I was going through a very stressful time. One day, it simply returned and continued on its merry way for another 25 or so years. From what you have written, it would seem that you may be going through a similar experience. On the other hand, you may have started perimeno or menopause itself. From all that I understand, there really is no way to know for sure.

However, whether you are in peri or meno or not, you can do many things to understand and treat your symptoms. Please read the many fine transcripts and discussions here on PS. There is a wealth of information to be had.

I am so happy that you found us. This is a site filled with caring women who offer 24/7 support and compassion. It has literally saved my life.

I hope to see you often.

Best,
Marcy

Crazy-

Wow-your experience sounds so similar to mine. I don't remember the disclaimer. I"m sure I signed one but perhaps don't recall all of the contents. Yes, they dont want to admit that the tubal can cause anything, but I just find it odd that I was not even in peri, and suddenly as soon as I had the baby and tubal I was never the same. Thanks for your response. You made me feel so much better!
Mary

Deb-

Thanks for your response. It's really comforting for to hear from people that have started ths young. The response I get from people when I tell them what I just found out Im going through is 'HUH! Why?? You're too yoiung!" It is those kind of comments that makes me feel bad/worried/weird. That only adds to the fact that my doctor has been telling me for the past five years that I am too young and dismissed my symptoms.

That really put me in a position where I stopped asking him questions and stopped doing any type of research or finding this site....ultimately I was attributing the missed periods and all the other symptoms to stress and anxiety and whatever other awful disease i though I had.

I wish doctors would be more open to the complaints and concerns of their patients, even if they are in their thirties! I feel like I"ve been living in my own private terror for the past few years unnecessarily.

thanks again!

Peri-

You have made me feel so much better! At least I'm feeling better knowing that so many others are having these symptoms. I think of all of them the ear ringing is THE ABSOLUTE WORST! It is maddening. Last June went it started it was constant, loud and mostly in my left ear. It drove me crazy trying to figure out what was causing it and it also caused lots of panic and anxiety. I also drove everyone around me crazy by constantly talking about it. I wonder if it's the changing hormonal levels. I get it some days now, but usually not. Xanax seems to help it so I also feel like the anxiety definitely makes it worse. Now I wonder if since it has improved so much where most days I dont have it if it's because I am getting into menopause and leaving peri? Who knows.

Marcy-

That is what I started thinking - that the stress was causing the missed periods and other symptoms that I was attributing to stress and anxiety. I guess I can kind of count on my FSH level of 79.9 that I am indeed in menopause since it's been over a year. I do wonder about my thyroid though. I know tinnitus and weight gain can be symptoms of hypothyroid. I think I would like to have that tested.

Thanks for writing and for your support. I can't believe the overwhelming support I am feeling thanks to all of you ladies. Finally, people who REALLY understand

Hi Mary:

Welcome to Power Surge!!

My story is similar to yours. I had my last child at 36 and was thrown straight into peri. I am 45 now. I did not have a tubal. My first symptom (although I did not know it at the time) was depression/anxiety. The depression and anxiety was so deep that that was all I had in my life at the time. I was put on antidepressants and they helped but then I started noticing other things like smell enhancement, hot flashes, numbness and tingling in weird places, foot cramps. My symptoms have grown and changed over the years and I was finally diagnosed to be in peri this year because my periods are almost nonexistent except for some spotting anywhere from 3 times a month to as far as 6 weeks apart.

Lord how I wish I had known about this place long before May of this year. I think everyone is different but I do feel there is some connection to the ladies in my family as all of them were in their late 30s and early 40s when they started peri and went into menopause. So the idea that we are too young is just ridiculous. I think that the doctors should come onto this sight to find out just how wrong they are. I believe when I see my gyn next time I will suggest it to her.

Hope you are feeling well. Hugs to you.
Jeaninne

hi---i was postmenopausal ,when I finally figured out what it really was.As they say 'hindsight is 20/20.I kept attributing my symptoms always to something else.How was I to know.they expect us to realize it because'we are the woman'..it's important i feel,to have a rapport with your doctor at this time.If you don't feel comfortable with the one you have,I would try to find another one.This is a very trying time,and it's important to have a doctor you like,respect.and have available to answer your questions.I myself switched to a female gp,and gynoc--the best thing i did for myself.i also reccomend not talking about it with too many people---everyone has something to suggest.come here to share with us.best wishes.

Clueless and Crazy, This is amazing and scary. I too had a baby at 37, a tubal, and by the time I was 38 (the magic number) - I started having the weirdest symptoms. Mid cycle brown discharge, constant state of nervousness, rage, tears, muscle pain, face tingling, random pelvic pain not associated with periods, ovary pain, foot and leg cramps, periods were different, still fairly regular but just different (different colour blood sometimes), feelings of doom, insomnia, headaches, weight gain that I just can't seem to shift, different body odour which comes and goes, constant anxiety attacks and the list goes on and changes at its whim. I too, wondered what the hell was going on and came across "Post tubal ligation syndrome" - but I wouldn't mind betting that is just perimenopause. It all seems too familiar. I have been "entertained - (told I was too young)" by my doctor into getting a blood test to check levels, but apparently they were within the normal range, but apparently that can mean squat. It's frustrating though. I've mentioned it to girlfriends who also say the good old "you're too young". Well two years later - nothing's changed except no constant nervousness - that's just time to time - but I've still got all the rest. I have to take half a xanax to sleep at night or I won't. Fun times hey.