I have just realized today that I bring myself down.I have been having a really hard period this week.Lots of aches,pains,crampy,angry,moody,bloated,hot flashes-you get the picture.Anyway I notice that I talk about this stuff a lot.I complain to my husband I complain to my friends,even my kids hear the "I just don't feel good today"speech too much now.I hate the way I sound,and concentrating on the bad can't be good!My hubby and kids never complain about it-they are great-but If I sound to them like I do to myself,they must be getting sick of me!I decided today that I am really going to try and not complain so much,and maybe just come here when I do need to vent.Has anyone else felt like this?Have you just wanted to stop thinking about this peri all the time?Maybe I need to find a hobby.Thanks for letting me vent.GOD-bless

Yeah I know. I can talk myself into a bad mood in no time. During CBT, I had to learn to refocus and at times banish the negative thoughts. I'm still a work in progress.

I was just replying and lost the message, so a similar version may show up. What I was trying to say is that I catch myself droning on too and try to take it as a signal when my husband let's me know I am getting into whiner territory, but he's nice about it and I feel that he has some understanding of what I'm feeling.

I discovered something that may be helpful. This morning I had appts with contractors involving converting the heating system from oil to gas. My exhusband was going to come over and help me. But after a rough night and really feeling like ****, I postponed the appts. When I called my ex to let him know, I simply said that my hormones were giving me a tough time and we'd meet next week.

It was so simple. I didn't feel like I had to cover the truth, but it was very matter of fact. It didn't draw a strong reaction from my ex either. It was all okay.

I mention my hormones to a lot of people (men and women), but I keep it short and try not to be obnoxious about it.

I wish my ex-mother in law had let on that she was menopausal back in the day. Maybe my ex wouldn't have been so mystified when I started "changing" in my early 40's. I also wish my mother and grandmother would had talked about this more. I would have benefited from knowing about what they were experiencing.

There's a huge difference in acknowledging a factual condition and coming unglued over it.

I feel the same way, especially this week too. Started spotting again in week 3 of my bcp. Cramps, bloating, ovary pain, gas, the list goes on. Just miserable PMS crap this week. I've had this before but not this much. I attribute it to school starting and just general worry over my health. There's nothing wrong, I've gotten my physicals, blood work, many tests for the last 2 years. It's just plain old health anxiety.

My best advice is to talk positively to yourself, counteract the negativity by putting up a stop sign and saying "I'm not going there today". I really try to not talk to others about it so much also. I know I come off as a whiner at times, I try to catch myself before now. I was always looking for reassurance outside myself, but have come to find that it needs to come from me. My husband, God bless him, I am sure I drive him nuts, but he knows when to comfort me and when to tell me to knock it off. He is my balance, I lean on him the most, he seems to understand the hormone thing pretty well.

Anyway, be kind to yourself, this journey we are on isn't fun at times, but we will get through it.

Have a good weekend!!!!!! Enjoy!!!!!!!!

I am trying to say good things as well.Today I started saying out loud"I feel good today" I believe it is working,and I have been reminding myself to not complain verbally.have a great weekend and GOD-bless

I try to stay positive also. Even if there are 100 things going wrong, I really try to find the one thing going right. It can be a struggle for sure. I keep repeating my mantra THIS TOO SHALL PASS!! Sometimes I have to stay off the internet, and even these boards. I get too easily distracted in the negative stuff sometimes.

We're all just a work in progress, but sometimes the process is sooooo slow!!! Keep the good thoughts ladies!!

My complaining got so bad in the last few years, my husband was on pins and needles right along with me waiting for my terrible symptoms to start about a week before my period. I've tried very hard these last few months to not even say anything anymore out loud. I try not to let on when my period starts. It's hard, but sometimes I'm almost done before my husband will ask if I ever started. When I tell him that I'm almost done, he'll be very surprised. Sometimes he'll ask me why I didn't say anything. I'll just say I didn't want to worry him. It makes things a lot more calm around our house.