hi girls,


I feel so awful EVERY SINGLE DAY, this constant pre-flu feeling, nauseas, lightheaded, just plain pure "sickly"! now, I remember the FIRST year of peri, last year ..... it was very bad, no doubt ...... BUT THE SECOND YEAR, IS WORSE!
Does anyone else feel this way? I can't really describe the difference, other than to say that as bad (and i mean BAD) as the first year was, the SECOND year, (which i am half way through right now) has made me feel SO DARN SICKLY everyday!
The first year, there were more SPECIFIC symptoms, one after the other without a chance to catch my breath, and that was horrifying! BUT, the SECOND year, now......oh gosh, it's not only specific symptoms from he**, but this CONSTANT sickly, awful, EXHAUSTED, weak, nauseas feeling almost EVERYDAY! It's not a matter anymore of having some good days, AND some bad days......no, now, it's only a matter of HOW bad each day will be. In other words, everyday, is BAD......just to a lesser or greater degree!

.....and I thought LAST year was bad!

anyone else feel like this?

Hi Mydarling,

I am sorry you are feeling so awful. When you say 2nd year of peri, are you still getting regular periods? Where exactly are you in all of this. I can tell you that my first year of peri (slightly irregular periods, wicked migraines) was NOTHING compared to this last year when my estrogen plummeted and I felt like crap everyday, all day for months on end. Everything that you describe...the "but this CONSTANT sickly, awful, EXHAUSTED, weak, nauseas feeling almost EVERYDAY! It's not a matter anymore of having some good days, AND some bad days......no, now, it's only a matter of HOW bad each day will be. In other words, everyday, is BAD......just to a lesser or greater degree! "

It has to get better, it just has to. I refuse to think it won't. For now, it is about trying to make it through to that other side. Are you doing as much as you can to help it? Eating right, exercising, and seeing your MD for any help they can offer? If you are and you still do not have even a day of feeling just ok...could you be clinically depressed and perhaps benefit from an antidepressant? The symptoms you describe above can be the same as a depression, and we know that our hormones can reek havoc in that department.

I remember a day in December that I just stood at my kitchen counter, so exhaused and feeling like such crap that I just stood at the sink and sobbed and sobbed. My phone rang and it was a friend who is a pediatric neurologist. We have a good relationship- but she is not the kind of dr. that likes to delve into my health, or her other friends health...she wants to be a regular person and not always the "dr"- and I don't blame her. I know this about her, and as I tend to be a worrier about every little physical thing, so I have learned to temper my conversation about health around her, because I respect her very much and want her friendship. Anyway, I digress...on that day at that moment, she said "how are you" and I just could not help myself. I said " Do you really want to know?" and then I said I am terrible and described all the feelings you just described. She told me she was going shopping and wanted me to go with her, but if I wasn't up for it, she would understand. Something just clicked for me and I made myself go....to just stop thinking about how crappy I felt. I didn't have a miraculous "I feel great" experience, but I did get my mind out of the rut of thinking and thinking about how crumby I was feeling. While out, I did feel a bit dizzy, and "out of it" but I plugged along. After that I just kept trying these baby steps. Some days are better than others....but I just keep telling myself, it has to end.IT HAS TO MYDARLING! It just does.

So I am sending enormous hugs to you- I wish I could just sit with you and share a cup of tea, and validate in person all you feel. But I am there in spirit, and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
Try to do one good thing for yourself this weekend.
Jan

Hi Mydarling,

I agree with Jonesy, trying to do something to take your mind off all this stuff really helps alot. It seems that we get stressed out so much easier than "before"...atleast it is with me. I always tell myself "tomorrow will be better"...even if it isn't I give myself some hope! I seem to lack the tolerance that I used to have. I am also raising two teenagers! My son is very difficult....I seem to dwell on everything. But as Jonesy said, you have to keep yourself busy and take your mind off things or you will drive yourself nuts! I am 43 and this stuff has been going on for 3 years now. I do skip periods for months at a time. Thats when its the worst. Then the period comes back normally for a few months and I feel ok. I know that taking my mind off of all my "symptoms" helps alot. Sometimes you have to push yourself to do things because you feel so terrible but it's worth it in the end.

Please feel better and try to look for the light at the end of the tunnell! It will get better. It has to!!

Yes mydarling:

Jonesy and happtimes are right - you just have to continue to push through. I too am in my second year of this madness - and perhaps I am just in the early stages or perhaps not but i refuse, absolutely refuse to stop living my life entirely and only living my symptoms. Not that its a guarantee that we'll feel great or even good while pushing through but at least we are trying to live. Jonesy is right - this has to end, we can not believe it won't. And like happy the only time i feel good is when i am about to have a period (only who the heck knows when that is).

I am sending you the compassion of the universe and at the same time much encouragement that you look toward the rainbow at the end of this misery when we will have all, hopefully, learned some very important lessons we treasure and will carry with us forever.

Love pookish

Mydarling...you are not alone. I have been walking around for over 2 years now feeling like total crap....especially since the start of this tension headache I've had daily for over 2 years now...every day, all day....some days there is less pressure than others....it's been horrific....plus the night sweats and hot flashes, constant anxiety, racing heart that wakes me up in the middle of the night, heart palpitations, off balance feeling, complete fatigue all day long, tinnitus, hair loss, sore breasts, etc. The list goes on and on. I haven't had a period for almost 14 monhts now. I try and do the best I can every day....get up and get through the day somehow. Then yesterday afternoon, I felt crystal clear in the afternoon into early evening. I had moozie take a note of that - LMAO...and I felt that way in the early evening too. I started taking L-Theanine about 3 days ago....I take it in the morning but I don't notice any difference in my mood to jump up and down about and I have to take my reg. anxiety med on top of it....but could that be helping me after all....hmmmmmm....time will tell.

Praying that all of us feel better soon.

Hugs,
Karen

Mydarling - I totally agree with everything already said. Try to push yourself to do at least a little something every day that gets you outside of yourself.

Do you have animals? As much as I love my husband, I find that the companionship of our 2 cats and horse helps me more consistently than anything (along with reading all the wonderful posts on this site). I faithfully go to the barn every day to take care of my horse and ride even when I feel awful. (Well, on my awfulest days, I don't ride - just groom him and feed him carrots). One nuzzle from him can have more wonderful effects than a Xanax (and I've resorted to those on rare occasions).

My warmest thoughts are with you at this trying time.

Karen - Gosh, for some reason and despite reading other posts to the contrary, I just keep thinking that if I can finally stop bleeding and just go 12 months without a period that I'll be free and clear. Your post reminded me that we all have to be prepared for the long haul.

Take care everyone.
Pam

I faithfully go to the barn every day to take care of my horse and ride even when I feel awful. (Well, on my awfulest days, I don't ride - just groom him and feed him carrots). One nuzzle from him can have more wonderful effects than a Xanax (and I've resorted to those on rare occasions).



Pam,

I want a horse.....can you adopt me - LOL. Seriously, I adopted a puppy and I walk him every day unless we have terrible weather. I love him...and it helps my spirit and I pray when I walk him too.

Thanks for sharing that. It's a great idea to have a pet...they are just so great to be around.

Hugs,
Karen

Mydarling--

I also find that the busier I am, the better I feel. I can push the nagging anxiety of "what was that pain?" or the "doomsday" thoughts almost completely out of my miind, which makes me feel so much better. I almost wish that I taught year-round!

The things that I used to enjoy, to use for relaxation, actually allow my brain to wander, and invariably it'll wander to pleasant little thoughts like heart attacks, strokes. . . .that kind of thing. So try really hard to fill your day with being busy. This is my 5th year of noticable symptoms and the last two weeks peri has kicked my butt hard. But I'm getting through it. And I'll get back to the good days again. You will, too. Hang in there. Don't lose hope.

BJ

Hi mydarling

Just a suggestion next time you see your doctor or gyno or however you ask for these tests is to ask for a FULL thyroid panel done including TSH, Free T3, Free T4 and both antibodies ie: Thyroglobulin and TPO. We have ALOT of similar things going on with the both of us this past year by following your posts and it seems upon further investigation of my previous thyroid test results that I do have some antibodies but all my other levels are fine at this stage. I have always suspected this as I had a similar experience post partum after giving birth to my daughter nearly 9 yrs ago but no one knew what it was back then and it went away but I have read this can happen and later resurge in life especially around peri and meno time. At least if you can cross this off your list you will definitely know it's just hormones having their last ditch attempt at wreeking havoc on your body before they eventually depart for good, whenever that may be....

Rox