Hi Everyone, this is my first post, I'm so glad to find this site. I am 49 and always been in good health until last year. Now I have so many strange things going on in my body and none of my docs can seem to find an answer.I am desperate to know what is going on and how I can get help. I live in a small town and only have assess to very traditional , male, run medical care. Has anyone here had these symptoms? Frequent episodes of dizziness sometimes followed by severe nausea and vomiting. Extreme fatigue no matter how much I sleep. panic attacks, which I have never had before in my life. and of course heavy irregular periods. I have been through the traditional treatments, D&C, exploratory Lap, many hormone combinations etc. Nothing is visablly wrong, but nothing helps. The worst thing now is crushing depression. Those around me are sick of me being"weak" and not able to participate in my normal life. Since nothing concrete is found, I'm told it in my head. I even went to a therapist(male) the only one taking new patients in the area. He showed me some breathing exercises, patted me on the head and sent me on my way. I want to die rather than live like this anymore, but I would never do that to my children. It's just hard to go on when there's no joy in life, you feel sick all the time, and everyone is angry with you because, you should "just buck up" I have read alot of old posts and see similar symptoms, but has anyone had family get angry because of this sickly person you have become? I have always been the one who did everything for everyone, all those I cared don't seem to really care much about me. Sorry this is so long, but I feel so alone, how can I face tomorrow. Any advice is welcome and wanted. I'm so desperate

Oh Cat, you poor thing. Welcome to Power Surge. I really don't think this is all in your head. Have you had a full thryoid panel done. TSH, Free T3, Free T4, antibodies? I did, and it was eye opening for me.

Also, you say you are having severe nausea and vomiting? That is surely not all in your head. Have you seen a gastroenterologist? You may have developed Irritable Bowel syndrome, or food sensitivities. You say you are in a small town and have limited access to medical providers....like me, you may have to travel a bit to find a new doctor; one that will listen to you and put all these symptoms together.

Something is going on. Don't let the medical profession dismiss you with a pat on the head---you deserve better. Stick around here; Dearest has created an absolutely wonderful place for women just like you to come and find answers, support, and many shoulders to cry on...

If you can, what would say are you three worst symptoms?...in order of severity (list the worst one first.) That's a place to start. You may need to look at your diet, revamp it, start supplementing with certain vitamins and minerals...another question I have for you; what age was our mother when she went through menopause, and what was her experience like?

Hope you write back....and I'm glad you found us.

your new friend,

Robin

From what I have read eveything that you are experiencing are symptoms of menopause. Unfortunately if that is what is going on it certainly won't help you feel any better. I too have had a lot of exhaustion, aches, and feel like I am getting the flu, sweats etc.... It is very difficult to stay on top of things. Two things that have helped me so far atleast-#1 is having an honest open discussion with anyone that might be affected by what is happening (be armed with lots of facts that are available on line!). If the people closest to you know what you are going through it can be very helpful. My husband isn't loving what is going on, but he tries to put up with it.
# 2 I started to do Yoga. I try and do it first thing in the A.M. (otherwise I won't get around to it) it actually makes you feel a little better and you learn to focus better.
I am not saying that you shouldn't go to a competent Dr. and get a full work up-you should. If it is menopause it's not fun, but there are some things that help. This site is a great start. Good luck and don't let anyone demean you! These things that you're going through are very real
Sue

Cat:

You definitely have come to the right place!! Like you, I found this site because I was so desperate at the time. I also agree with what RoundRobin suggested, if you need to go out of your immediate area to find competent medical care....then do what you gotta do!!

I also agree with her suggesting you figure out your very worst symptoms and address them first. In my case it was depression, anxiety, panic and fatigue. I also had dizziness, hot flashes, lack of libido, difficulty concentrating.

I needed to address the depression and anxiety first as I was becoming agoraphobic! I couldn't even leave my bedroom for a few weeks. I started on an anti depressant and was given Ativan for the panic attacks. Now I am feeling emotionally stable (more or less!!), not depressed, I added L-Theanine recently as a daily supplement and it has taken away all the residual anxiety. I also found as an odd benefit the AD has taken away the dizzies too.

Now that these symtoms are under control, I can look at treatment options for the rest....but as I was not even functioning before, I needed to get well enough to want to live...before I could go further.

My husband tries to be supportive but is often angry with me, as he feels he is having to do "everything" now. I don't feel very sorry for him really, as he is just doing the very basics of what I used to do !! s*ck it up buddy!! LOL!!!

Take things one step at a time.....talk to Robin above, she is very knowledgable about US doctors and insurance etc. I am in Canada and do not know much about the American way!

You take care and come often....you have tons of new friends and we all love to help!!

Kathie

Hi Cat,

So sorry to hear about your symptoms. I totally understand the feeling of desparation trying to figure out what's going on with your body. I was cruising along just fine and then there was a total mutiny inside of me. I too had the dizziness with nausea. It came on in waves, followed by exhaustion and fear. I've had several tests and all are pretty normal. My symptoms have developed and changed over the past seven months (which I know is not much consolation). Just a thought - I ended up being sort of diagnosed with migraine symptoms without headache. I have gotten a lot of relief from a chiropractor. I no longer have the extreme nausea and dizziness (sometimes dizzy, but not nearly as bad). I also used to get pressure feeling in my temples and back of my head, that too has subsided. You might give chiropractic care a chance. Aside from this website, the chiropractor is one of the only places I feel a sense of peace. I would also give the yoga a try. Good Luck and keep us all posted!

CJ

Dear Cat,

Welcome to Power-Surge. I am so sorry you are having so many symptoms.

I have had all 34 of the symptoms on the home page and have got through them, so believe me, this will pass. In the meantime, though, I can only lend my support and also encourage you to go outside of your immediate area for a doctor if you are not getting what you need.

For too long women have been patted on the head and told to run along. A trip to a major medical center is a worthwhile investment if you get someone to listen to you and then treat you accordingly.

There is a whole community here to help you. Post often and take advantage of the wonderful kinship.

Best,
Marcy

cat,

your post made me cry - i so understand where you are at. & so do many others here. the good women who have already responded to you have a wealth of info & support, don't hesitate to reach out.

what you are experiencing is real. it is not a character flaw or lack or will power or determination. unfortunately many people simply have no idea what this is like. i have struggled with mood issues all of my life, but they have been much worse at times of great hormonal flux. those messages that we get that everything is fine & here is a pat on the head are so damaging. when it comes from the doctors, it is even worse. & i have had family & friends get angry with me as well because of it.

it's hard to sort out stuff when you are feeling so depressed & physically bad. it sounds like this has become chronic (right now mine is swinging in & out, so it is not with me daily) & hasn't responded to any thing you've tried so far. is there someone in your life right now who you can trust to help you with this? if not, i think you'll find much help here, but there may be alot or advice & info to sort through. i don't want to throw alot at you, but i want to reiterate that you are not alone. i have used antidepressants at other points in my life, & they were key in reestablishing balance & returning me to life. research & women's experiences point to the important connections between mood & hormones, even if the medical community & the culture we live in doesn't recognize it. they are just beginning to understand the complex interaction between hormones & neurotransmitters, with some info suggesting that in some circumstances both hormonal treatment & antidepressant treatment are the most effective approach in restoring general health.

there are other approaches as well - i don't want to throw more in right now. i just want to convey that we hear & understand your pain. & to reassure you that there is hope & support & ways out of the darkness.

please keep in touch,
ellen

Dear (((Cat))))
You've had some great replies here and there's nothing much I can add!
Just want you to know that you're not alone and that there are loads of lovely ladies here who can and will support you. Don't despair!
I'm so sorry for you, we all know how you feel and how very difficult it is for family members and friends to understand. How to explain how awful we are feeling when the doctor says we're fine?? That makes me so angry! Perhaps you can show some of these posts to your husband and help him to understand how much you are suffering?
You need all the love and support you can get. Perhaps you also need an AD. I took a tranquilizer for the terrible anxiety and panic. Anxiety can cause dizziness and nausea.
I found Claire Weekes book "Self-Help for your nerves" very helpful.(Ordered over Amazon, as I live in a tiny village in Spain!)
Perhaps you'd also like to look at the thread about L-Theanine - many meno-sisters seem to find it helps a lot. I have ordered, but it hasn't arrived yet.
You might even find you are already feeling better as you now know you're not going mad, it's stupid hormones and we will all get through this together!
So, a big welcome to PowerSurge and join the fun!
Loads of hugs and prayers,
Jonie

Thanks to everyone for the encouragement. I just feel better knowing I'm not alone or crazy. I see my Gyn tomorrow for one last chance to try and help me. I have found a Doctor, 2 hours away, who is into more holistic medicine and even prescribes natural progesterine cream and vitamins. I have given traditional medicine a year of my life, now for another approach. This doc is female, a former breast cancer specialist who decided to get into this specility because she was having problems of her own. She is also into breast cancer prevention big time. From the other forums it seems natural progesterome has worked for others. I have an appt early Jan. I have also been printing out all kinds of info for my hubby to read. He has to see proof of things before he believes. MEN.... He is getting a little more understanding with knowledge. I am so happy to have found this site. So much useful information and support. I hope I can someday give back what you've given to me. Hope!

Boy do I understand how you feel. It took me ages to come to terms with the fact that it was the menopause I was going through. I didn't want to accept the fact that I was getting to 'that stage' but I got to the point where I had to get my bloods done as my mind was doing overtime, and when I did, I guess it put my mind at rest in one way, but knowing what it was, hasn't helped the way I feel physically. I wish I could give you a wondeful answer as to how to deal with your symptoms, as apart from the fact I don't have to deal with periods as I have had a hysterectomy, the other symptoms make up for it. As for the husband issue, bless him, he tries his best to understand, but he suffers from bi-polar disorder, and he isn't on top form all the time, so its difficult as one day he is helpful and understanding, and others he is calling me for everything, I try and explain how I am feeling, but I sometimes think he thinks I am just a hyprochondriac, but its just his condititon, it doesn't help the stress situation. I am so glad I was told about this site as reading it is such a relief knowing Im not alone, and others have been there, and come out the other side, still with all their marbles, and feeling like they have a new lease of life, I pray to my Goddess that that day will come sooner rather than later.

I am not sure about the vomitting, but I too suffer from the anxiety and depression. And guess what? I am 49 also. I suffered 4 miscarriages during my fertile years and so I assumed I would have some difficulties during menapause. I have been hospitalized and seen a psychologist and nothing seems to help. I have started using a natural hormone balancing cream which helps with some of the symptoms and then not. It does have an impact on the depression which had me in a bind. I took antidepressants for a couple of years and then they just stopped working. Now my face is so dry and broken out I can't take it. I lost my job and now the stress of what tommorrow will bring is crazy. It amazes me about how little is really known about a women's body. You can read all kinds of things about eating right and exercising but even those things don't help. I hope we all get through this time of life, because I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Hi Cat...
Sorry to hear you're feeling so lousy these days! Some of your symptoms definitely sound like perimenopause, but I do have an idea about something else. The dizziness, nausea and vomiting could be an inner ear problem. A couple of my friends have Meniere's disease and it sounds a lot like that. It's worth a look, anyway. As for the other stuff, I've had the irregular periods and panicky stuff going on, that sounds like it could be perimenopause. I hope you get some answers from your doc...hang in there!

Oh, I forgot...extreme fatique is also a symptom of Meniere's...

Hi Cat
I am new to this site also. I am sorry you are feeling so bad. I am in the same situation you are. I feel depressed all the time and my family and husband are sick of me. They barely talk to me anymore which makes me very lonely and sad. I am only 41 but I went through early menopause at 36. I have been having a hard time coming to terms with it. The depression, anxiety, insomnia etc. all seem to be a part of it.
I wish I new someone who has gone through this and feels great now.
I hope you feel better soon.
I will be thinking of you.
hugs, Kayla

Kayla,

(((BIG HUGS)))

I'm irked with your hub and family right now.... Bet there have been plenty of times you took care of them!

Hope you find lots of loving support here - we know what you're going through!

Luv,
JJ