Just don't feel like it....energy is low but not too bad, but just can't seem to get into anything...don't seem to enjoy putting up the tree...just going through the motions, pretending I am enjoying, but I feel nothing or even worse, slightly depressed...Never been like this before....

what is something very, very mild (very sensitive) that may be a pick me up once in a while....I don't want to feel like this but I am certainly afraid of feeling worse...I have St. John's Wort herbal tea...will it help or do anthing at all....any suggestions...I miss my "Christmas" self!!!!!! Joan

Dear Joan,

I empathize so closely with your feelings. And I am sorry you are not in your usual holiday frame of mind. I am new to the world of supplements and herbs, so I will let those with lots of knowledge and information help you on this one. What I will do is tell you that the feelings will pass and that our other friends will have some good ideas for you.

In the meantime, try to stay nice and calm, and tell yourself that this is a very common phenomenon at this time of year. It may not be hormonal or psychological at all. Take one step at a time. Be good to yourself. Perhaps do one holiday-related task. It may spur you on to do more.

Take good care of yourself. And I hope you will very quickly get into the holiday spirit.

Smiles,
Marcy

Joan -

I find it hard to be enthusiastic about anything a lot of the time - this has happened recently during the last 10 months. - I have this profound sadness that will go away for brief moments, like half a day. I'm hoping that once my thyroid is sorted out and I begin taking BHRT things will get better.

I read a post from CSugargrove some time ago - it was a post similar to yours and I remember that I was really touched by it -- I was just trying to find it but I'm not having much luck. In this post she said she couldn't get into the spirit of christmas - until after she recovered and went post. Its really a good post - if I find it, I'll post the link

(((hugs))

Dear Joan

I agree with what's been said..the holidays themselves can be slightly depressing...lots of "have to" things to do, for example.

I don't know what the weather is like for you where you are, but one of my tried and true mood lifters for minor depression is to get outdoors, ideally in the sunshine, on a walk by myself. Walks with other people are for something else.

If I can get out, it doesn't need to be too long, or too vigorous, but I walk & let the thoughts roll on if I'm full of thoughts, until they start to settle down by themselves. As they do, I start looking around: at the trees or at people's houses....not trying to do any thinking....one of my little hobbies is to see how people do their plantings in their yard, or if it's holiday time, how they decorate.

The trick for me is to keep walking, keep the easy rhythm going, not try to solve problems or come to decisions, let the thoughts wind down. Half an hour usually helps; 45 minutes does, but I think part of it is to make it no goal, no stress, enough to get the emotional kinks out. Not difficult. Nice if it's in the sunshine.

I read somewhere that people sleep better at night if they get their exercise in the morning, the first half of the day. I tried that and it did help a little...better sleep is a mood lifter for me, too.

So the recipe I suggest is sunlight and a no-stress walk to let the thoughts wind down.


Here's a hug

I could have written your post a few days ago. Same thing - "mild depression." Not into Christmas and very upset by that.

I'm five years post, having a flood of symptoms after a stressful summer. I don't take anything but Vitamin C and E - I've had too many bad experiences with meds.

I took out my Claire Weekes book and found her description of depression as "emotional exhaustion after weeks of worry" to be right on target in my case. She says that the depression always lifts as the emotions replenish temselves...and this will happen even while you're depressed.

I also believe what I read in John Ott's book, Health and Light. I try to get some sunlght every day - haven't been doing it lately though. He says it's enough to even stare at the sky (not right at the sun) for two minutes every day.

I felt better yesterday, put up the tree, but spent a sleepless night with muscle twitches and anxiety. It's very discouraging, but know that you're not alone.

Regards,
Helen

I plan to just skip Christmas! I purchase presents for everyone and I actually enjoy that! But I don't feel like putting up a tree etc. Why stress myself out! Plus afterward have to take everything down. I'm sure once I'm post and feeling better and there are grandkids my Christmas sprit will return.

Try to do something for a local animal rescue or a homeless shelter. Most homeless shelter get a lot of attention this time of year so I focal more on buying goodies for the poor abandon animals whom won't have homes on Christmas day!
Also ask them what else they may need, like old clean towels & blankets, bleach etc.

Gez, I really hope that you locate that post from CSugarGrove. Her posts are always packed with so much wisdom and reassurance, and I need that right now . Please send me a pm with the link, I don't want to miss the post....thanks {{{{HUGS}}}}.

thanks for everyone's replies...yes, I just don't feelin like putting up the tree...what's the point will have to take it down anyway is my feeling (though for my dauighter I DID put it up....) just don't eel like doing anything...I will take the walking advice....I was exerciseing a while ago and it does help lift the spirit...the first day is always the hardest...just to get up and get going..sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh. sigh.................................................................

Oh dear Slowbear, I think that you sound mentally and physically exhausted. No doubt you have been running around for years like superwoman being all things to all men. This year is different because the hormonal turmoil inside you has drained all your energy. I think that you just need to give yourself a break and not feel guilty about drifting along for a change. It is important for your loved ones to understand this. I am absolutely confident that all your previous energy will return very soon and that it is just a matter of time before you explode into action again. Your body needs this down time to re-adjust, so try not to think about it as a negative thing. I have recently been in meltdown and just had to give in to changing my lifestyle. I now look to the most simple things to give me pleasure. I agree with the other ladies that, at this time, nothing can beat a good walk. The other day I took a friend's dog for a walk and we had a really good time kicking through the autumn leaves. Watching Billy's enthusiasm and joy of life really perks me up. I found a collar and lead in a Christmas shop with sleigh bells on it. The sound of the bells as we trudged along in the woods, as the winter sky started to change to that lovely pink was awesome. The pile of dirty dishes and ironing I left behind was rather scary but I felt much more able to cope with them when I returned.

I shall light a candle for you tonight, perhaps you could do the same.

XIII

Some things that really help my mood in winter... the best thing is the Cod Liver oil capsules I've been taking. Studies have shown that both the omega3's and the vitamin D in them are great for combatting depression. Also try taking a good multivitamin and extra vitamin C. A good diet with a lot of fresh fruit and vegetables.. and I try to walk a mile or more each day... I use my treadmill in the winter. If you are in the northern climes then you may want to invest in a full spectrum light to read by for an hour a day or so.. I got mine on the internet for about $150.

Hope these suggestions help!
--Kathy

I am so touched by all the replies and advice...I honestly thought that my little topic would bring few results..it is heartening that so many" stranges" are so willing to help another stranger (and I get stranger every year.....). The sun is out today...I am totally exausted from working yesterday...yes the laundry in the washer, dryer and piled up to be folded on the bed and it will wait as will the other worries...trying to take heart in a quote from mark twain on worries:

"I am an old man and have known many troubles, but most of them never happened"

Joan

Slowbear:

I believe exercise is the best thing for mild depression. Give it a try. It has done mea world of good.

Shakin'

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF TAKING AD? THATS WHAT I HAD TO DO AND BELIEVE ME I FEEL 50 PERCENT BETTER. AND ALSO NOTICED EXERCISE HELPS. AND JUST BEING AROUND PEOPLE HELPS. HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER SOON. TERRY

HEY SHAKING WHAT EXERCISE DO YOU FIND WORKS BEST? TERRY

Terry:

I do cardio (treadmill or elliptical) five days per week for 45-60 minutes each day. I also do 60 minutes of weight lifiting three days per week. Honestly, I am not sure if one or the other works better. I just know that on the days I exercise I have a bundle of energy afterward and I am nto anxious.

I think if you can do both it would be really great but if can only choose one I would do cardio. It gets your heart pumping.

Shakin'

THANKS SHAKIN.

First, thank you to MyFaith and Gez--I had no idea that my posts helped anyone, and you really made me feel great today! Lately it seems as if the kind words just get fewer and fewer in life, so those that we do hear are like gold.

Gez found this post from me and I had completely forgotten about it--she must have one great memory. It's from years back!

"Peggy Sue, Yvonne, Chris, In answer to the question about whether I decorated during the holidays for two years while I was in peri, the answer is No! Do you know what I did? I put my Christmas tree up in the front window as usual, and I put some lights on it. It looked nice from outside. We were in the usual family feud, so we had no company during the holidays. I could not face the box of ornaments because they all had meanings for me, the ones my daughter made in school, the ones friends gave me, etc. I missed my daughter when she had been young and excited about doing things with me, like helping me decorate. So I didn't put any ornaments on it for those two years, and since we didn't have any company anyway, nobody knew except my husband. My husband was a little surprised, but he didn't say much about it. The third year he sat down with me and untangled all the hooks and handed me ornaments one by one. We've done it that way ever since, and the tree gets decorated again. Anyhow, here is an idea for the problem of not feeling like doing the household projects. When you don't do anything all day, and you sit and watch TV, you have to probably endure more bad feelings about yourself, right? You feel even worse because you didn't do anything, but you don't want to, and it gets to be a vicious circle. I have gone through this, and I found that if I made a small reasonable list of things to do in a day, nothing earth-shaking, but, say, about three chores I could get done in no more than a two-hour time slot, I'd force myself to do the chores and during that time I would NOT give in to any feelings of not wanting to do them. I would forge ahead and do them and refuse to think anything except that I will get them done. Then I could finally crash and sit down, but I didn't have those strong guilt feelings. I felt as if I'd earned the time to relax. And I felt a little better that at least I'd gotten the three things done. The next day, same thing. Forced myself to make a list of three things to do. If one of the things was complicated and horrible and I really couldn't face it, I'd break it down into three or four phases and do one phase per day. I know this sounds idiotic to you, maybe, but I discovered that it helped get me past the block of not wanting to do anything, then feeling guilty about it. I had sort of a "contract" with myself that if I got the three chores done, or one big chore that was broken down into phases, I had earned the reward of sitting down. Some horrible chores have to be done in one big phase. Like washing the kitchen floor (ugh!) You have to move everything out, wash it, wait for it to dry, then put everything back. This could count as the only thing you did all day, because you can't really break it down into phases. Instead of going around in circles, thinking about what you have to do, then thinking that you can't stand to do it, just write a little contract with yourself that you will STOP thinking, and do three things, and then you will sit down and relax, and you will have earned it."

Thank you, Sugar! ... I appreciate you posting this! So, thank you!

Sunshine! If it's too cold to get outside, sit by a sunny window as often as possible. It works wonders for mild depression.

I agree that exercise is the best.I walk with my german shepherd,at least thirty minutes daily.Well for the past two weeks it has been chilly,I was ill and did not walk much-guess what?I got depressed and anxious.I hate feeling like that,so I am going to try to force myself to go tomorrow!!GODbless

And then there's your signature, Lady E. Isaiah 40:31

I totally agree about exercise. I pray a lot, which helps. And six weeks ago I started taking SAM-e, an over the counter antidepressant. It seems to be working as well as the last "real" AD I took, but without any side effects. It took about three weeks for it to kick in. I also try to use cognitive therapy, with Feeling Good as a guide.

I really hope you find ways to find joy this Christmas. Keep writing! You have a lot of support here.

How honest and how true! This is what I do usually; try to keep going by doing a certain amount of things in a day so i don't do nothing. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and don't know what to do first. Some days, it's hard to just move. This gives me hope!! Sometimes I think I have to do it all or do it perfectly HA!! I know there's no such thing but sometimes still feel that pressure. I love putting up the Tree; Just bought a Victoria Secret White 9 foot tree on Ebay Last year and it's Gorgeous!! ALways loved going with my Dad to get a tree at Xmas. One of the best parts for me. Hard being tired and doing things but then after I've done them, I feel energized; Depression, Sadness and Perimenopause. One moment at a time.

Thanks for this post!

Jan

Oh, how I do relate to this post. I too just don't have any Xmas spirit this year and am feeling slightly depressed. It doesn't help that my husband and I moved to a new state 4 months ago and the weather has been gloomy and rainy for weeks. Usually I love putting up a real tree and getting out all my beautiful old and handcrafted ornaments. This year I told my husband don't bother as no one will see it and he's not even going to be here on Xmas. I just can't stand shopping and trying to act like I really care. All the holiday music just makes me sadder. I hope I snap out of it. Though, one thing that did help-I've been getting involved with a local hospice and I just met the loveliest couple yesterday. They are in their 90's and also don't have family near. The warmth they shared with a stranger they just met was awesome. I guess it's always good to see there are people who are also lonely, needing or whatever and I think it was what I am needing. I hope you find something to lift you up as well, I've been following a lot of your posts.

Thansk Dakotalady! I went to a christmas concert yesterday and while I was there I was enjoying it...Bethoveen's 9th as well the whole thing! Have never heard a symphony from beginning to end before...

I am still lacking in the ..well I can tell I am slightly down...don't feel like it....　　just so blank and blank and wish it would go away this is bad....。。。。I keep doing but my usual me is not there...I know I need to get out and walk but I have a foot problem and lat I tried it hurt and so that is walk but I have a foot problem and when I tried it hurt and so that is also keeping me from the walk and so many little things just just seem to be piled up...sooooo many...get overwhelmed...and I think about a AD but one time I tried and within 3 days I felt SOOOOOmuch WORSE even more blank...no feelings like just existing...it was awful so now I am afraid....jeeze this post is depressing,...but that is how I feel now....


everyone is different but is there a mild AD that usually works for most people...I hate feeling like this in ADDITION to the physical symptoms.....Joan

Hi Joan -

I think its great that you went to a Christmas concert and enjoyed it!! Its such a positive thing to do! I'm lucky if I can drag my ass out of bed these days or even cook dinner. And if I do manage to cook dinner - well...its a good day.

Hey Joan,

I have to admit I haven't read this entire thread, only the posts from you, so maybe someone has already suggested this...try taking a hot bubble bath and just relax away some of your troubles for the hour or so that you're doing that. I know it can't solve your problems, but it sure is relaxing and a nice respite!

My story at the moment?

I have been overwhelmed this Christmas season, too, by having to work up until three days before Christmas, and I've not been feeling well. I have almost no time to shop because I am exhausted when I get home from work, get dinner, get everything else done, and do my exercises. (Which, at this time, make me hurt, but I still do as much as I can.)

We actually shopped yesterday for the first time, but now we are pretty close to being snowed in this morning. I was planning to get more shopping done today. Do I feel like it? Absolutely not. I not only have my family to buy for, but also the kids at school, my friends at school, the kids at church, and my daughter and I are in charge of the family get-together this year, so we have to organize the party for about 30 people on the 29th. It's also my daughter's 18th birthday two days after Christmas. To top it all off, my MIL is in the hospital with back surgery looming in the next few days. If I look at the entire picture, I just want to crawl up into a ball and cry. I have managed to keep on "keeping on", though.

We're in the process of remodeling our bathroom, and our kitchen. Neither is done, so there is chaos in my house as well. I haven't dusted for a couple weeks and can't even stand to look at it, but why dust? It'll just get dusty again, so I've decided to let that wait for awhile. Hopefully, my husband can get the stuff done the week after Christmas and the house will be back in order. Then I'll dust. Maybe I'll also wash the clothes, vacumn the downstairs carpet, insist the girls clean their bedroom, etc. Right now, I just DON'T CARE!!

I guess what I'm trying to say is that we con only do so much and the rest has to fall by the wayside until we can get to it. In the meantime, choose to NOT CARE about the little things. For me, my faith and the comfort of prayer get me through.

I know I wasn't much help, but knowing others are going through "stuff", too, does help. I think.

So, my wish for you is still a "Merry Christmas"!

Deb

Hey Girls!

This is now the 4th Christmas season where I've felt like crapola. (Not as bad as the previous years), but still bad enough that many things are still a struggle. However, over these last years I have learned some valuable lessons - especially the ones that revolve around what's truly important. Yes, it's wonderful to have a grand tree, lots of holiday goodies, gorgeous presents under the tree, the whole 9 yards - however, that's all window dressing. What's important is being with those you love - friends, family....

As a child, I grew up loving Christmas - I couldn't wait for it to get here. Once I got married, I began to fill the house with decorations, lights etc., it looked just like the north pole. A tree in every room, lights and pine swags over the doors ... get the idea? I'd shop all year long so when Christmas came everyone would have lots of gifts to open. Then I went into peri, altho at the time I had no idea what it was. That was probably...8 years ago or so? It was like something shifted and everything was 'harder' to accomplish. Then 4 years ago the holiday season began, and for the first time in my life, I felt no anticipation - everything was a bother. Yes I struggled through it, but I couldn't wait for it to all be over. The next year was the same - except I was smarter by then. I cut back on baking goodies, less gifts, fewer cards were sent out -

Now, here I am 4 years later and altho it is getting easier - I'm like everyone else...I want my Christmas spirit back, but it's no where to be found. Yes, I have gone back to decorating the house to make it look like a winter wonderland, but I didn't rush through it. I spent well over a week putting everything up instead of thinking I needed to accomplish it in just a few days. Baking? Well, if I don't get to it, it's ok...that's why we have grocery stores. Cards? No newsy letter, just a simple heartfelt greeting. Gifts? Well, if I come up with an inspiration, I'll jump on it, if I don't...ya gotta love those gift cards.

But what I have done...is taken time. Yeah, time. In otherwords, I absolutely refuse to feel rushed this year. Every night I set down and make out a few cards, then I go do something else. I watch a sappy Christmas movie on TV. We've had lots of snow the last few weeks, so either my hubby and I or my bestfriend, will take a walk at night. There's nothing quite like walking in a christmas snow around the neighborhood seeing all the holdiay lights. Then it's back home to the warmth and a cup of hot cocoa. You see, it isn't about buying things, it's about time spent together. That really is the greatest gift of all. Cookies can be bought, tree's can be decorated or not...(sometimes a tree is prettiest when it has nothing more than strands of lights.) Gifts for the kids? Well, I've yet to run into a child who doesn't have a list as long as their arm. When I find something on that list, I buy it, but I don't knock myself out anymore trying to make the holiday perfect. Everyday is perfect in it's own way - we just don't see it because we're in a peri 'haze'.

Idunno, maybe it's because I'm older, but material things just aren't that important anymore - it's time spent with people you love. My bestfriend and I are always together at the holidays...no matter which one it is, and we found having someone else do the work is the easiest. A lot of grocery stores cater now...you buy a meal that serves 6 for 50 bucks, well we split the cost, and presto, a good meal we didn't stress over. Instead we go ice skating, or to a movie, or we talk on the phone for hours.... Ladies, our christmases WILL get done - everything we need to accomplish will be taken care of - just share the load. If a good friend bakes, ask her to make some for you - take her the supplies and let her have at it. Can't think of what to buy someone who has everything? Then donate to someone who has nothing. But take the time to appreciate everything we do have. We have friends and family who love us - (most of which are aware we are not at our best.) Do you honestly think they want to see us stressed, exhausted...? No...they don't. If they love us, they only want to see us happy, but that happiness starts with us, and our limits. YOU have to set the limits for you. Yes, I know it's hard saying no, especially at Christmas time when everyone goes top speed. But, we are all far from it...so why punish ourselves because we 'think' we have to get it all done?. Someday we will be back to our old selves, but right now, I'd rather have a quiet Christmas with as little stress as possible, than to become exhausted and have everyone 'pay' for it...know what I mean?

There really are ways of getting around everything that's beyond your ability. Delegate to family...if someone likes to shop, say...I'm looking for this, if you find it, buy it and I'll pay you for it. (there's always someone young in the family who loves to hang out in malls - right?) Don't feel like sending out cards...then simply call everyone. Say...cards have gotten so expensive, I decided to forgo them and give you a quick call instead.

See what I mean? Ladies, the best 'present' I can give all of you is my experience at what I've learned over these last few years - which is don't push your limits. No one ever died because they didn't get the christmas gift of their dreams. No one ever had a lousy Christmas because you didn't get the baking done etc. It's 'ok' to make what YOU need top priority this Christmas, and every other Christmas until our world has 'righted' itself again...ok? And until then, just smile, wish everyone a Merry Christmas and hand them their to-do-list... ok??

So many posts here that reflect exactly how I feel, and everyone is so kind to add there experiences...it does help!

That is so sweet, Tay, got tears.....Of course you are right, but I don't have to buy things or decorate, but I WOULD like to FEEL some fun and anticipation and joy more than I do...I know it is peri but still.

Ok, I am trying...and I hate having to "try". Last night I did my annual "White Christmas" movie viewing...love the song about when I am anxious (?) and cannot sleep I count my blessing instead of sheep and I fall asleep counting my blessings.....that song says it so well and I have so much to be thankful for.... all those wonderful blessing sometimes depress me or make me feel guilty even more...... as I grew up Catholic and guilt is my second name...but that's another story.....just miss the FEELINGS! Man this peri stuff is no good....don't you think evolution has been rather mean to us...I mean, give us wonderful hormones and make us feel good...good enough to reproduce and then s u c k it all out of us little by little until everything is sagging to the ground or falling out or falling off or something...sure how there is something better once I "cross over"....joan

dmar: wow you are sure doing a lot! You sound like superwoman to me! But I know you are not all into, like me, as well. Thanks for your words of encouragement....maybe I should watch White Christmas again...or Its a Wonderful Life.....feeling tired today, but the sun is out.....joan

You know I came to this board this evening to offer encouragement and as usual I was the one who received.

This is the most caring group of women I have ever known. Just to read how supportive and encouraging you are. Think about it--this board *is* Christmas. Yes, life has handed us a lemon and we can't even get up enough energy to squeeze it much less make lemonade. But you know what--we will survive one day at a time. I know without a doubt that I would never be alive now without PS. It wasn't just the information you generously shared--even if meno is crazy because it's so hard to figure out a target that seems to be constantly moving--but also the honest feelings and grief. Believe me, you are not alone.

In case you didn't know, Dr. Holtze is offering a free booklet, Thyroid and Hormone connection. I got the email today. I don't know it's contents or value, but sharing is the key word here.

Here's a thought. I read about lighting a candle. Why don't all of us light a candle in our window on December 31st for the sisterhood here. As the candle burns, we will remember those who are struggling and wish strength and love that sustains to all we know going through this difficult transition. A candle for hope in the New Year. Maybe we will start a tradition.

Love to all,

ygirl

What a lovely idea ygirl...I will be lighting a candle on Dec. 31st and thinking of all of you dear friends....

What a lovely idea ygirl...I will be lighting a candle on Dec. 31st and thinking of all of you dear friends....

As long as brain fog will not prevent me...I will also light a candel...sweet idea!

[quote name='ygirl' date='Dec 18 2007, 06:16 PM' post='201307']
You know I came to this board this evening to offer encouragement and as usual I was the one who received.

This is the most caring group of women I have ever known. Just to read how supportive and encouraging you are. Think about it--this board *is* Christmas. Yes, life has handed us a lemon and we can't even get up enough energy to squeeze it much less make lemonade. But you know what--we will survive one day at a time. I know without a doubt that I would never be alive now without PS. It wasn't just the information you generously shared--even if meno is crazy because it's so hard to figure out a target that seems to be constantly moving--but also the honest feelings and grief. Believe me, you are not alone.

In case you didn't know, Dr. Holtze is offering a free booklet, Thyroid and Hormone connection. I got the email today. I don't know it's contents or value, but sharing is the key word here.

Here's a thought. I read about lighting a candle. Why don't all of us light a candle in our window on December 31st for the sisterhood here. As the candle burns, we will remember those who are struggling and wish strength and love that sustains to all we know going through this difficult transition. A candle for hope in the New Year. Maybe we will start a tradition.

Love to all,

ygirl
[/quote


Ygirl,

What an awesome idea!! Count me in! I will light my candle and think of all the wonderful ladies I've met here on PS. As I welcome the new year, I will ask for the Lord's blessings for each and every one of us. Take care, my friends!

Deb

don't you think evolution has been rather mean to us...I mean, give us wonderful hormones and make us feel good...good enough to reproduce and then s u c k it all out of us little by little until everything is sagging to the ground or falling out or falling off or something...sure how there is something better once I "cross over"....joan


me feelings, exactly. and the men move merrily along!