Hello - I am having PMS and have been really on edge. It is gettting worse by the month (am 49 years old and still pretty "regular" with period) - buy the PMS is unbelievale. Yesterday I got a parking ticket when I parked in a space marked "Non-Residents: 2 hour limit" in my town. I am a resident so I thought I could park there. I got the ticket and called the parking authority and they said it was a "complaint ticket" That "resident" meant someone who lived on that street (I didn't know that and have lived inthis town for 14 years) and that a resident on that block had called in the compaliant that I had been parked there for more than two hours. I said OK and calmly hung up ($29 ticket!) - Then I cried. and cried and cried. I kept saying to my family... "I can't believe someone is so mean to call me in ... I can't beleive someone has nothing else to do with their time than to snoop out the window and the parking situation!..." etc.
I literally cried and cried and couldn't stop. Then today my kids left for a mini vacation with my sister-in-law and I have been crying that they left ever since. I am at day 20 of my cycle so I think it is coming early this month. I need to drink wine tonight but my husband's dad was an alcoholic and he makes me feel guilty when I have it (I buy a bottle once a month when PMS sets in and I get drunk on one glass). He doesn't say anything, but that too is making me feel embarrased or "weak" in some way. Am I crazy?

I am so embarrassed. I don't know what the kids thought about my reaction to ticket (I have three teenagers). They must think I am nuts. I understand I am "hormonal" but even when I was pregnant I did not react so badly. The thing is, there is no cure for this...

Just sharing my craziness - anyone else out there feeling shame at their behavior? enen though we know it is out of our control?
daisy

Dont be embarrassed Daisy - this has happened to me more than once - I've become almost child like again ..

Don't feel bad i am 49 going through peri . I see my 18 yesr old son like once a week and we he comes over and then leaves the next dayi cry like a baby...This is just a normal peri symptom for us. Don;t feel bad and its not crazy what we do. Take are lizardlover

Daisy,
Don't be embarrassed. I never knew that I could cry so much until I hit peri. As I have said in another post my son broke up with his girlfriend when I was in the thick of peri and I cried for days. I knew it was irrational but I just couldn't stop. Of course I did feel bad for her because she was so upset but my reaction was way over the top. I cried if my husband or kids even teased me or looked at me the wrong way and this was not me. I am now post and I seem to have the tears under control and can even be teased again.
So don't feel shame for your behaviour, it really is hormonal and harder to control but it does get better. Take care. Arla.

Thanks everyone - It's nice to know I'm not alone...
Love daisy

hi daisy,

i'm a pretty calm & gentle person & only tend to get really emotional around my period. but in this last year i have had some spectacular meltdowns of all types. the 1st really scary one was an episode of rage (ok - been angry, but really nothing like this) so out of proportion & control. i thought i was going nuts so i made an appt with a therapist. we had several sessions, but everything seemed ok to both of us, so we ended treatment. then i started having the crying waves & i'd have like to thought that i was just getting in better touch with my emotions, but really these reactions were over banal things.
this stuff comes & goes for me & i just try to find ways to calm & take care of myself when it happens (like removing all stressors if possible). (i will confess to throwing old dinner plates at the garage when i've had another rage episode - but i planned that out as a management step. it did work, though i don't know how advisable it is.) good luck - hope it evens out for you.

ellen

Oh God yes! When peri symptoms were really bad last winter I cried over everything. things I had absolutely no control over like the Pet of the Week in our local paper - would it be adopted? Would it be euthanized? Should I go and adopt it?

All I needed was for someone to look at me "funny" and I was in tears. I was also reading "bad things" into everything my boyfriend said.

I did end up going for therapy. I have also been put on anti-D and a thyroid pill. Between the meds, the therapy, and a rebound in estrogen, things have been going very well.

So Daisy, don't be embarassed. But also don't look at any Pet of the Week pictures either

or animal documentaries.

Yes. Even talking on the phone to a daughter, I worry what I might say that I will regreat; tell her too much, say something that might upset her, say something that comes out wrong. Often I call back and apologize for what ever I might have said or not said or said wrong or..... I rerun it in my head until I'm not sure what I said or how it sounded or how she took it. After I apologize and we hang up I feel like she thinks I'm going off the deep end or I feel guilty for taking up her time. The whole thing is nuts! I know it..... but it still happens and it will again.

The good thing... my oldest daughter is in her late 30's. It won't be long and she will fully understand then we will see who is crazy!

I babysit my one year old grandson overnight about every other weekend and every time my son comes to pick him up, I sob after he leaves. I just can't control my emotions at all.

Also beware "The Wonder Years" ... now in reruns on the ION channel. I love the show, but am pretty much guaranteed to cry (practically sobbing) during and at the end of every episode - hits too close to my childhood heart. The rest of my day - I'm on the verge of tears almost constantly - happy tears, sad tears, in-between tears - it doesn't matter what triggers it - the triggers are just THERE. One wrong thought about my parents who are in their 70s ("Are they doing okay? I going to miss them so much when they're gone.") will set me off. And why the heck am I even thinking that stuff. The closer I get to 50 (which I really don't have a problem with as far as admitting it, etc.), the more often I think about death and how I'll handle it - my own as well as anyone close to me. It's a sentimental thing, partly... But I want it to stop. Rationally, I know it's years and years away... But this irrational crud crops up WAY too often.

Anyway... I'm glad to know I'm not the only mushpot out here.

Once I creid so much that I ended up with a sinus infection. When I went to the doctor I was too embarassed to say this - I just said I had just ebdured a bad virus, cold, etc that left me with the sinus problem.
Thanks for the tip ...I will not look at pet of the week adoption photos. Also, I just watched The Cider House Rules for the first time and cried the whole time, even suring commercials. Stay away from movies with orphans in them!
Daisy

I suddenly burst into tears when I heard the space shuutle had landed safely. Mom thought I was nuts. I don't usually pay any attention to what they're doing--and to be sobby over happy news? These are the kind of things that make me question my own sanity.

Miss Tibbs

I should have a sign with "Beware Waterfall" hanging around my neck!
Everything makes me cry!
Then I have to laugh, it's so silly!
Which makes me cry again... I can actually laugh and cry at the same time!
So, just join the club!
Happy crying!
Hugs, Jonie

Ohman - this IS me?! I am scared of how I am feeling. I think I need to take some ativan, valerian or something but can't afford to feel tired. I am sooo overly sensitive that it's ridiculous. I am usually quite sensitive but I am more so than usual. I find myself want to withdraw from people because (excuse bluntness) they piss me off. I just take the slightest thing that someone does and magnify it out of proportion. I snapped at my boss on Friday (don't regret he deserved it) and I live in fear of being told by someone to not be so menopausal. I will just go over the deep end if they say that to me. Half the time it is men that may think it and/or want to say it. I wish they knew what it is like to live with fragile emotions. It's so unsettling.

suzpaterson

I think that many if not all of us can relate to this. We tend to become a bit of an open wound during this phase. I know I am. Big time. You're not alone.

Hugs to you Daisy!!!!!
I went through a 10 day stint of ultimate depression from kNOWWHERE last month (see post "What happend to me") I cried and cried and cried, felt lifeless and really in a clinical depression. The strangest part of it all is that I came out of it as fast as I went into it. That is the scary part! I have so much energy right now I almost ask myself if I am not turning bi-polar through all of this. I also was alcohol intolerant for a while. Even after 2 glasses of wine I felt kinda hungover the next day. I am 100% convinced that what happened to me was a major hormonal inbalance but I don't know why. I pray to God that it dosen't happen again any time soon, it was much to much for me to handle. I also have a 14 year old Girl and twin 10 year old Girls. My 14 year old called me Psycho a few times...dosen't make me feel any better. I think we need to accept that we are human and sometimes things DO get out of our control but as soon as we once again have our feet on the ground, make amends with our Children, we need to look foward and hope that our bouts with hormonal depression will become fewer and farther apart.
Hang in there...sometimes it is that GOOD big cry that makes us feel better. NEVER hold it in!!!
Girlsmom

You Kids make me feel like I am at the worlds biggest slumber party!!!! thanks! All the girls getting together letting it all hang out about what it's like to be a girl!!! Women O.K..... all the same..... Linda

It is nothing to be embarassed about. I remember getting all upset once because I had to go to the hospital to get a test done. I was there 2 hours and didn't think I would have to pay to park. I got all upset over it and I over reacted to it. I was PMS'd at the time. Things happen. Give yourself some space and just take a deep breath.

oh glad to know still normal!!

OH, I needed to read this post today. It happened again this morning. I woke up tired and could literally feel myself crashing into a depression. I was talking to my husband at the time and told him I'm crashing and started crying and couldn't stop. My lovely husband got me to go work out and kept the girls. He even vacuumed while I was gone. I felt a little better when I got back but still very much on verge of tears all day today. Very heavy fatigue also. Weird. I was happy to see also that "girlsmom" had a bout of alcohol intolerant too. I tried to drink one glass of wine last night and felt sick to my stomach and am almost convinced that, that is what brought this depression on this morning. I had cut out all alcohol because of the last time I had a couple of glasses on a friday night, I woke up in a rage on a saturday. I have always been able to have a couple glasses of beer or wine for A LONG time. Once this sensitivity started occurring I really had to stop. It helped to stop, but I get a bit despondent of not being able to do it anymore. Silly, but a social habit for me that I enjoyed. Oh well. I don't really want it right now and especially with these side effects. Anyway, the peri continues to overwhelm and control my life right now, but am anxious to get to the doc monday to demand a hormone panel and then am off to a naturapath at the end of the month that has a specialty in hormone balancing. I wish a "good day" on everyone.

formeandmygirls.

I think it was a natural reaction to get a little down about having to stop the treat of beer and wine for a while. Self-denial is never fun--like a diet, etc. Sometimes I think we tend to get a bit too down on ourselves--too self-critical--too sensitive--thinking that at one time it would have been no big deal--not necessarily true--I think at this time in our lives we feel different--so we think we're different--when actually we're about the same as we always were. I know I am not as easy going as I used to be-but that's the big difference. I used to have problems--have to change my behavior or make choices--not a big deal--now I feel like it is a sign of some drastic change in me--and possibly a problem I've developed. In my saner moments I can see the folly of my thinking. When all is said and done--I'm still me--it's my body that is changing--not me. In my worst moments I can't stand to look in the mirror--because I think I look terrible. In my better moments--I realize I still look the same and wonder what my problem was. It's all down to hormones--going up and down, down and up, going away completely, surging to new highs. It's not our faullt--it's no one's fault. We just need to be able to cut ourselves the same slack we used to be able to do without even thinking about it.

Anyway, I hope you have a good doctor visit--and wish you much success with the hormone replacement. I started hormone replacement in March 2007 and have not regretted it for a moment. Things just get better and better for me. It's slower than I'd hoped but perhaps that's because I waited so long to do something about it. I had my last period in the summer of 2000. Anyway--the hyper-sensitivity is going now--and it's a huge relief.

Here's to better days full of that wisdom and menopausal zest I keep hearing about.

Miss Tibbs