Am I dying or is it perimenopause?

I have been sitting around the past few days symptom surfing on google ... and I am making myself crazy .. so I decided I would come here and just ask for some feed-back from the "experts" LOL

First I have a tear (under the skin) that runs from the top of my belly button and less than an inch long .. I have a tender lump around my belly button and a bulge to the right (all under the skin) can be felt .. it is painful .. I first noticed the belly button pain when I was carrying my twins (they are now a little over three years old) ... I mentioned it to my doctor and he said it was normal .. but after the twins were born and some time had went by I noticed the tear .. mentioned it to a doctor ..she said she felt a little defect and that I could have a hernia .. now some time has passed and I noticed that there is a tender lump and the bulge .. this has me worried and I have Health anxiety as it is .. so I go from worried to totally freaking out that I have some terrible illness and I am going to die ... (whew, feels good to get that all out)

Now the fear for me comes from other symptoms that I have been experiencing that I go from thinking are perimenopausal or could be something else .. worst fear cancer ... because of the belly thing .. I hope I'm making sense here LOL

I have experienced a lot of stress this year my twin little girl was diagnosed with a wilms tumor = kidney cancer in March 07 she has had surgery to have her left kidney and the tumor removed ... she had 6 days of radiation and is currently going through chemotherapy .. This has been very tramatic to say the least ...

During the the time in the hospital with her I missed a period which I attributed to stress .. Once I got home my period started and ended up having two periods in one month .. then a regular period and missed a period last month and none so far this month ... I did get all the symptoms that it was going to start but nothing happened ..

right now my face is broken out
I have sound sensitivity
tender lumps in breast
nipples were errect and sore a few days ago, but that went away ...
I have felt what I thought was a hot flash a few times .. face just felt hot lasted for about 15 - 20 minutes
I have had the rubberband snaps on my skin .. mostly my hand, but thigh and foot too
at night I go to sleep but wake up off and on the first couple of hours because my body feels hot especially the back of my knees ...
I'm shedding hair
I feel edgy
anxiety (dread) doom and gloom I'm dying kind ..
bouts of depression
overwhelmed
I have total loss of libito (sex sometimes is almsot repulsive to me) I could careless about it .. and my poor hubby is feeling totally unloved .. I don't want to pay any attention to him . .it feels like a chore .. I don't even want to touch or lay close to him ..
I've experience palpations
my breast get lumpy, and extremely painful, full
urination incontinence upon laughing, sneezing, yelling .. sometimes I've actully didn't even make it to the bathroom before it tricked down my legs
my sinuses are acting up .. sometimes in the bone area under the eye gets red and swollen
had some Ibs symptoms
gas
gained weight
bloating
water around hips
very weepy lately
internal shaking
strong arm pit odor
tension in my back
crawly skin
forgetfulness
smells are exaserbated
bouts of brain fog

I'm a mess

Some of these symptoms come and go .. the ones that are in bold are the ones I am currently experiencing at this time ...


I just am so freaked out that something terrible is wrong and I'm afraid to go to the doctors ... I don't think I can take much more than life has already throw at me with my little girl going through all that she is ...

I guess what I am looking for is some solace that it is probably just a hernia and perimenopause ..

(sigh)

I posted a couple times on here about a year ago ... and had a mirena iud removed felt better .. thought all was fine and dandy, but now the symptoms are back ..

thanks for listening

Sherry

my biggest worry is the missed periods ..

Oh, and I guess it would help if I posted my age = 45 lol

I am thinking hernia, peri and STRESS. Stress can bring on sooooooooooo many symptoms. Since you have obviously become very proficient at looking up scary things on the internet (I say this in jest because we all do this ) try doing a search on anxiety symptoms or stress related symptoms. I am betting you will find that most of your symtpoms are either peri related or stress related.

You have been under an inordinate amount of stress and your body is just warn down. I actually think going to your doc might bring you some peace of mind. This is something coming from me because I really dislike docs but it may help.

I hope your little girl is doing better. Are your twins a boy and a girl??? I am a twin and I have a twin brother.

Take a deep breath, try to relax and do something nice for yourself. You will be okay.

Steph

Thanks Steph .. I appreciate your reply .. I am hoping just a hernia .. and yeah stress is my closest companion as of lately ..

My twins are a boy and a girl .. I also have a 4 yr old little girl too, as well as an 11yr old, 14 yr old (not my bio, but same as lol), 16 yr old (all girls) and an 18 yr old son all at home .. plus 19 yr old, 29 yr old girls out on their own ..

{{{Hugs}}}
Sherry

Good lord...no wonder you are whipped. Take a break. Make hubbie take care of the kids and you go have a mani and pedi. Then think about having a massage. Know wonder you are dragging. I have no excuses my one 19 year old son is at college.

You do know what causes all of those kids to appear....right?

yes .. and that is part of the reason for my loss of libito

(((((Sherry)))))

My heart goes out to you. I have spent the last several days googling symptoms too. It's horrible, this health anxiety. I have always been somewhat of a hypocondriac, but lately it's much, much worse.

I am not a doctor, but a bulge could very well be a hernia. I know this because I have come across this condition in my incessant googling. I hurt my back about 2 months ago, and been to a chiro (useless), my gynecologist, and a massage therapist, who works wonders. My back is cleared up, but I have terrible muscle issues on my right side - esp. glutes, hip, pelvis, and qls. Extremely tight and inflamed muscles - it feels as though my muscles are always sore and tight, esp.in the glute and hip area. As a result I've been googling all over the place and finally called my GP, who I can see in 2 weeks. I wondering if my tight muscles go along with peri? I'm 46.

Best of luck to you - I agree with the poster about a massage - go for it!

Or you could hide under my rock with me!
I'm so miserabile right now.
I had a break recent how nice it was but here I am sufferening again.
You didn't mention aches and pains?????

Mom2rudy,

{{{{Big Hugs}}}

I have heard that muscle tension is related to peri ...

I wonder if there is a googler's anonymous group?

Snowmoon,

I'm sorry you are suffering ... Aches and pains are no fun for sure


{{{Big Hugs}}}

That is funny...googlers anonymous....

See...I think you are feeling better already!

woooo hoooo! Looks like I'm going to start after all .. but that still doesn't dismiss my hernia concern and my wondering if I'm peri or not ..

Chime in ladies I need your feedback

{{{Hugs to you all}}}
Sherry

Muscle tension is DEFINATELY my worst symptom of peri! Rudy's mom...well, I have had the tightest butt (and I'm NOT complimenting myself here!) for about a year! I hurt my back 4 years ago just bending over and deadheading my flowers. "Ka-klunk" is the sound it made and it's been acting up since. Chiropracters, which normally help me, couldn't do a thing. Health anxieties kicked in and although it's getting better, the muscle tension is my rear is almost unbearable from time to time. The busier I am, the better it is, but I wake with such tension in my lower back, down my right buttocks and thigh EVERY morning. I had an MRI this week and have a slightly herniated disc, but other than that, just normal degeneration for a 51 yr. old woman who is "drying up"! I'm in physical therapy and it does help but I haven't been at it long enough to see what the results will be.

Yes...anxiety is the worst! All those other symptoms could definately be hormonally related, but also stress related. I have found that stress that I used to handle with no problems, now that the hormones are "moanin", is much harder to deal with. I am holding out hope...many others have shared that it DOES get better.

And yes, these symptoms can start at 45. I was 47 when mine hit like a TON OF BRICKS, but b/c I still cycled fairly regularly, I couldn't believe it was due to hormone changes. NOW...I can look back and clearly see it was.

Also, the tear and bulge in your belly...there's not too many things it could be other than a hernia! That's not life threatening...but something you will feel better getting repaired. Glad to hear you are cycling...that should help relieve some of your symptoms for awhile. These breaks are always welcomed!

We'll be praying for your daughter. I am sure this treatment isn't helping.

The bulge sounds like a hernia to me. I have one, but it's up higher than yours. I had it repaired 3 years ago, but it's back and looks larger than before. I dread having to get it repaired again!!
The rest sounds like peri. You're the right age and the symptoms sound all too familiar!! And also stress. Why wouldn't you be stressed? My goodness, all the kids and now one of them with a health issue!! I don't know how you've held it together at all!!!! You need to see a surgeon about the hernia and see what he/she recommends. Probably will want to repair it, and you have to make sure there is no intestine coming through the torn muscle. (The hernia). It's all a big pain in the butt, but it is repairable.
Hang in there, I really don't think you're dying of some awful disease. I've had all the symptoms you describe and more for at least 10 years and I'm still here. LOL (Still think I'm dying off and on too, LOL). It's not fun I know!!!!!!!!! Keep posting, there is so much information and support here!!
God Bless,
Faith