I'm wondering how many ladies here are considering or have actually had, plastic surgery to improve their looks. I was supposed to have a breast reduction in June, but alas, hubby lost his job, so that got put on hold. But the surgery was for medical reasons, not cosmetic. Still, I was looking forward to my chest being uh...lifted.

I have to admit...I also hate my nose (think it's too big), my stomach (pouchy and getting worse) and of course the wrinkles on my face aren't going to go away. I've thought about a nose job, tummy tuck, and face lift, but I'm torn. I've seen celebrities who go way too far (anyone seen Joan Van Ark lately? She's positively frightening.

What say you ladies? Is a face lift giving in to the societal notion of what we're "supposed" to look like, or is it something we have a right to? I've heard once you have one procedure, you want another, then another, etc, etc, etc....like plastic surgery is addicting. My mother had trouble with her eyelids...they were drooping so much that she was having vision problems, so she went to a plastic surgeon and had an eye lift. It took years off her face. We routinely discuss whether or not either of us will ever have face lifts.

And of course there's always the worry that the surgery won't go the way you expect it to. (Remember the episode of Seinfeld where George's girlfriend gets a nose job and it turns out bad?)

One final question: For those of you who WOULD do it, would you tell anyone?

But remember that in the end the nose job was redone and she looked great! But George already dumped her by then. I still watch Seinfield.

I would consider plastic surgery if I could afford it. Right now I would like some minor laser zapping of some of my spots and broken blood vessels. I would also like that laser treatment that supposedly tightens your facial skin. I am afraid of surgery though, maybe that is why I want to try the laser stuff.

I think I would tell my friends, I probably could not help telling them because I am such a jabber mouth and cannot keep a secret.

Kathy

I am so scared to go to doctors when I am sick....I just cannot imagine I would do elective surgery for any reason...other than a health reason.

I have thought about doing a photofacial though to remove a few small age spots from my face. That is as far as I would go though.

Dear RoundRobin
All my adult life I have hated my nose..... but here I be.... over half a century old......and I wouldn't change a thing. I have finally accepted who I am both inside and out. I am no longer young and I want my face to reflect the wisdom that I have acquired......by living.................LARGE!

Having made that statement....there is always a BUT........and I will never say 'never'. Who knows how I will feel at 60.......but....there is that but again........my mother never had anything done surgically to improve her appearance, and she looks mah-velous at 72........baby! I think I lucked out in the gene pool.....my father always looked much younger than his age, and ditto for my mother.

I think I would be afraid that it would not turn out the way I had hoped, and since I love to laugh......I would hate my face not to reflect my laugh lines.
Here is to looking at YOU!

Dottie

Ladies! I am 62 and just this year have been considering doing some laser and or a peel. I have pretty good skin considering I fried myself while younger. I just want a rejuvenation so to speak. Having surgery is not on my plate right now. I am from a good gene pool. Both of my parents looked young into their 70's. My dad had laser in his 60's for vessels and age spots. His skin still looks smooth and unlined at 86.

If I were to ever have surgery I would tell my friends. It would be real hard for me to hide it. One of my friends had a face lift in her 50's. You couldn't really tell that she'd had surgery. She looked rested and she looked better. She aged fairly rapidly in her 40's so she was a good candidate for a face lift.

That's my two cents worth...whatever floats your boat and if affordable, go for it!

Susan C

I would in a heartbeat have plastic surgery..I have already had breat augmentation to put my breast back on the front of my chest..After nursing two kids my breast looked like two empty socks I had that procedure 9 yrs ago. If I could afford it I would have my butt lifted off the back of my thighs..It is fallen and can not get back up.lol

One of my favorite shows is extreame makeover..Oh I am so happy for these people when they get their results..I must say this is a very personal decision and I feel that if plastic surgery inhances how you feel about yourself,by all means do it.We put makeup on ,,wear clothes that we feel good in,,,we get our nails done our toes, and hair to make us feel our best...Sooo why not plastic surgery. I even feel for the men who are balding...Go ahead and get them plugs..Buy that rogaine..Like I said if they had a Extreame make over lift your but show ,,I would hope they would spot me in a crowd and say girl your the next contestant on the lift your butt show...I would send yall a post card from my recovery room.

And yes I would tell my friends, it is nothing to be ashamed of.


Hugs,
Pamela

I would and I did, last year. After stuggling with these thoughts, I decided that I wanted to fix a couple of things. I was scared, and believe me, I thought about it for years before my nerve to actually do it came.

I had my eyes done, upper and lower, they look darn good, shaved a good decade off my face with that alone. I also had a bit of a double chin, that was fixed by a small lipo suction, it did not hurt and the results were amazing. I also had my breasts done, just implants, no lifting needed. It was probably a mid-life thing, but it all went well, and I researched everything and consulted with 4 different surgeons before making my decision.

I did tell my friends, some thought it was great, others thought it was purely vain. I worked for the $$$ and I made my decision, so I have no regrets today, just feel and look better.

Juliann

You bet I would! The two major drawbacks are the cost and the time off. So far, nothing has bothered me enough to commit my precious vacation time to. Still, I will probably do something once I turn 55. The laser treatments sound good...

I have to take a anti-anxiety pill just to have my teeth cleaned at the dentist, so elective surgery is OUT for me! I watch some of the surgeries on the Discovery channel and just can't imagine willing going through that trauma. As far a celebrities who have had face lifts, I have not seen any yet that look natural. Most of these women start to resemble one another in an odd way after the procedures.

Hi Juliann:

I think its great you had the courage to go ahead and make changes to your looks - that is partly why you are happy - in this world appearances are so important that I am amazed that more people are not doing something about aging - I see so many women who are so miserable with their aging faces but don't have the chutzpah to do something about it. I have had quite a few things done - and I started young (at 34) since I did not want to look and feel like my friends mothers who were miserable about looking old. I told myself that at 50 I would look and feel like a young woman and young men would think of me as their age - and it has come true - I am now 50 and I look (on a good hair day) about 35 - so I don't look "good for my age" - rather I have gone back into time - my point is why go through all the expense and trauma of surgery only to look "good for your age" - the secret that I discovered is that you should do all this as young as possible - I had the good fortune of dating a plastic surgeon who told me that really the best age for a face lfit was in the late thirties, early forties as the skin is still resilient enough to look natural - the people who look unnatural and "stretched" are going too late - when they are in their late 50s or 60s - right now when I walk down the street young women look at me as competition and young men are constantlly checking me out (as not because they think of me as a Cougar) - when I showed someone my ID he almost died - I have however not told many people of my "secret life" as I don't wish to have to deal with their opinions of it - a lot of women are too scared to undergo surgery and some don't have the money - but they are jealous and self righteous and condemn people who have surgery - I don't need that - especially when I am spending my hard earned money on this - so keep ahead of the aging game and keep looking good

During my teens and 20's, I spent a lot of time laying in the sun. By the time I started to avoid it, it was too late. My skin was lax, had lost much elasticity, and my mouth actually turned down. I looked very sad all the time, even if I wasn't. Even though I'm thin, I had a turkey neck under my chin which bothered me. My eyelids were droopy. When I looked in the mirror, I saw someone who looked depressed and defeated. I could see it on other people's expressions when they looked back at me. My skin had lost elasticity and my mouth drooped down on both sides. I didn't want to go through midlife looking that way.

I researched like crazy and had consultations with probably ten plastic surgeons.

I had my upper/lower eyelids done when I was 41. Then when I was 45, I had a full face lift by a very good conservative surgeon. I'm now 51. No one can tell I had a facelift. I didn't look "done". It just made my face look smoother and more rested. It made me feel more myself, how I used to feel about myself. I no longer looked defeated.

If you're considering it, do your homework. If possible, know someone who went to your surgeon and look at her results closely. Look at lots of before-and-after pictures to know what you want and what you don't want (there are some scary results out there). I didn't want to be transformed. I just wanted to be freshened up.

I wash and wax my car and get it detailed. I get my hair highlighted. I keep my house clean. I see nothing wrong with smoothing some age away from my face. It did make me feel better about myself.

interesting topic-

L2

I say go for it if it's something that you want for yourself. I had somethings fixed to my standards last year (age 51) and am VERY happy with the results. Spent time with my kids two weeks later and they didn't notice a thing. After all, I'm just their mom!! However, my son-in-law did think I was looking pretty good and liked the new hair style. I'm thinking what new hair style??!! My self esteem has improved. It wasn't bad to begin with but DH notices the change in our bedroom. It also spurred me on to improve on my overall body appearance. Since my touch-up I've lost and additional 15 pounds. Wear a size 2/4. Have to sometimes shop in the junior section. I don't think I shopped in the junior section when I was a real junior! It's just that the small procedure I did so changed my outlook on my whole person. If it's not a financial burden and you've done your research I think you'd be happy. Good luck with what ever you decide!

Love the responses here...L2, and others who have taken the plunge...I just have to know: How bad is the recovery? I have had 3 friend who had tummy tucks and the period afterwards was really bad. They couldn't work, drive, move for months and months. All 3 got post operative complications....is it the same with facelifts. Isn't your face all bruised up like a prize-fighter when it's over? And how long till the swelling goes down?

I'm not afraid to get a face lift....but I am concerned about how long it would take post operatively for me to actually look good and see the results. I can't take weeks and weeks out of work....

I am not very brave at all but i could do with some breasts i didnt have much to begin with after 2 kids i have nothing much at all and what i do have has slid down a bit, okay a lot, i am so envious of peoples boobs, not because i have a fancy for other peoples breasts i mean i would like to fill the front of a dress for a change, them darts they put in dresses i dont think i have ever filled them. to walk into a shop and buy nice bras
we live in hope

Good topic--and one that we all can relate to, sooner or later. I've grappled with this, but what stops me is the expense. It's not covered by my insurance, and I don't have the money. Period. I had medical eye surgery last November, so I wouldn't lose my eye, basically, and I still had a large bill even after the insurance paid most of it. Another consideration for cosmetic surgery is upkeep--you are never done. You may be done for a while, but then you need more. Or you may need it somewhere else.

I think what may be addicting is the euphoria that comes with looking good AGAIN after looking bad. If I try to visualize how I might react to cosmetic surgery, I can see why it could be addicting. I've been very depressed about looking older, and I've seen reactions in people that I don't look as good as I could, so I can imagine that if I had the work done, and looked good again, I'd feel COMPELLED to continue it; I'd feel maybe like I HAD to have it. Addicting.

I went to a backyard party last weekend and the hostess told me that a woman would be attending who'd had something done to her face to tighten it up. I don't know if it was a facelift, or something newer. Anyway, I did see the woman and she looked very attractive. Usually people who are older just don't look, well, pretty anymore (women). This woman was pretty, but she had to be in her fifties like me. I didn't mention the cosmetic surgery, since I wasn't sure if I "should know" about it. I'd love to have done what she had done, and look good again, but I just don't have the money.

As far as telling people, I don't think I would. Let 'em think I look that good naturally!

Wow, what a great topic. And how thought-provoking everyone's ideas are. Here's my POV.

For years I had great hopes of being able to afford cosmetic surgery by a certain age....I don't remember....37 or so. But that age came and went. I never did get the money. I clung to the dream for awhile....But as soon as the TV shows started showing ladies' stories, who've had done what I wanted, my outlook changed. I began to realize, "HELLO! This is surgery--during which I would be CUT OPEN and SEWN UP." No thanks! I no longer have any desire whatsoever for cosmetic surgery of any kind.

Besides--I'm with SugarGrove about upkeep and never being done. In the long run, what is the point? The passage of time changes everything, even "work" we may have had "done." Going under the knife to reverse aging, for example, seems to me an expensive and painful and temporary reprieve from, um, nature, I guess.

That said, I don't find fault with anyone if they want to do this! I do plenty of other cosmetic things to myself--hair, makeup, clothes etc. Looking good is quite important to me, and I understand that motive in others too. If anyone wants the medical procedures, go for it! Only, take time to consider what you anticipate/hope for the next few decades, not just the self esteem and compliments of the first few years.

I wish you all the best.
Lavender

I'm sitting here today watching Plastic Surgery Nightmares on E. Yowza! For those considering any procedure, thoroughly do your homework before choosing a surgeon.

[quote name='Lavender Fields' date='Jul 26 2007, 05:16 PM' post='179703']
The passage of time changes everything, even "work" we may have had "done."

Hi Lavendar Fields:

You will always look better (provided that you are not one of those unlucky ones that have a bad result) after surgery than if you hadn't had surgery - you can't stop the clock - that is true, but you can hold back time for a bit - of course we all eventually deteriorate, but you will be amazed at how much younger one can look just by having a few little things done here and there - I have seen women in their late 50s who look like they are 40ish - now that is going back into time a good 15 years - and good for them - this is the first time in history that women can look good when they are older - in fact some women (who were not that pretty when they were younger) can look even better with surgery when they get older. It is amazing the times we live in - of course their are plastic surgery disasters, but then there is a risk of crossing the street too - you have to choose your surgeon well and be in good health and not have very high expectations - and of course not tell anyone - I agree with Sugargrove on that point. I am very happy looking 34/35 to most people though I'm really 50 - it has worked for me - but I have done mostly peels and lasers and I started young (34) - so I'm well ahead of the game. be brave and good luck

Hi RoundRobin,

Regarding the recovery time, it's a couple weeks. The first few days you're resting and taking it easy and can't do more than that. I started to feel better after about four days but still swollen. My bruising wasn't very bad and dissipated pretty quickly. The swelling takes longer. and of course you have stitches around your ears (depending on how you wear your hair, it may cover it) and they are noticeable until the stitches come out and they heal. It's definitely not months and months, but I'd say a few weeks before you are presentable. I had a friend who was out shopping three days after her facelift (with sunglasses and a hat) but I healed more slowly. Plus it's major surgery and the anaesthetic causes constipation and it takes a while to feel bright and energetic again. But the facelift is probably much easier than the tummy tuck (they're going into the abdomen).

You see the results quickly and then are eager to get healed. The first night was hell. The second day was mostly sleeping. By day three I was walking to the kitchen myself to get the bags of frozen peas for my face. You definitely have to have someone with you the first 48 hours, hopefully longer.


L2

My mom's favorite saying is "Never say 'Never'", but I'm pretty confident in saying it in this case. If it's something someone else wants to do, that's fine. I'm not going to be judgmental of anyone. Everybody walks their own path. But it's not for me. I don't believe in cutting into a healthy body. I won't even have Lasik, and I'm blind as a bat. Better glasses than bad eyes that can't be fixed.

There are exceptions of course. If you have a nose that you can't see past, boobs you have to push around in a wheelbarrow, or if you get mistaken for your grandmother, then yeah. And of course corrective surgery after accidents or disfiguring diseases or a HUGE weight loss (hundreds of lbs). But otherwise, nope. Remember the saying "Be careful what you wish for, because you might get it"? Case in point: Jennifer Grey. Famous as a cute young woman with a quirky nose who got to dirty dance with Patrick Swayze. Fixed the nose. No longer quirky, no longer "Baby", no longer employed. What's wrong with having a little personality in your face? We don't want everybody to look alike, do we?

If I ever start considering it I'll just look at a recent photo of Cher or Joan Rivers or Mickey Rourke or Bruce Jenner or Burt Reynolds. And of course we can't forget the supreme surgery addict Michael Jackson. I realize those are extremes but how many people started off with something innocently enough and then got obsessed with it? No thank you.

larafalcon, please please will show a pic of yourself here or your profile. I'm just sooooo curious.
Good for you!

I'd like a medium chemical peel but nothing else. Has anyone had one or seen anyone who's had one ?

Robin, I just took a look at your pic. What do you need a facelift for???? You're gorgeous! *shakes head*

Now it would be nice to see some pics of thos who HAVE taken the plunge , but as for me.....not a hope. The most I would ever do is keep my lips plump [normal, not stupid looking] because I love lipstick. But as for other srgery, like the type I need on my nose , not a hope. I no longer care, and kind of like the more 'mature' me. I guess I am at the acceptance stage, but can understand others who may enjoy a little zing to make them feel good. If it's what you want, go for it, but make sure the surgeon really knows his work.

If any of you are interested in procedures, I highly recommend the Make Me Heal message boards. They are not very active but there is plenty of good info there.

Hi ladies, in regard to plastic surgery I do not agree with having it unless it is absolutely necessary i.e for burns victims etc. I do not know why we all have to be conditioned to want to look like some of the horror head aging plastic celebrities who look like they should belong in the wax museum - they look kind of dead. Why do we need huge boobs which look ridiculous on most bodies. Couldn't this contribute to breast cancer and other problems.

I say grow old gracefully, don't hinder the bodie's mechinisms with implants and garbage so that doctors can get rich - it is all so phoney.

Just my view ladies.

Hugs

Thanks, Vik, but I don't consider myself gorgeous. I have a really prominent roman nose; notice the pic of myself has my face titled sideways. I HATE my nose...would love to have a nosejob. But I probably never will; too much $$$ that I can always justify spending elsewhere, and I just can't afford the down time for recovery.

Facelift is another story. Since my thyroid went ka-blooey and peri is in full swing, I feel like I've aged 10 years in the past few months. So many wrinkles. I'll wait till I'm in my fifties, but I think I would definitely consider having one...

Regarding the breast implants...I have enormous mammaries, and have been approved for a therapeutic reduction (ie the insurance co will pay for it). Again, it's a time-issue; with everything else going on in my life, I can't afford the recovery time right now and the loss of income it would represent for us (I'm self employed with no disability.) However, I can't for the life of me understand why any woman would want big breasts---they have been such a source of pain, humiliation, discomfort and embarassement for me. I guess it's a case of the grass is always greener on the other side. I long to wear skimpy sun dresses, shirts with spaghetti straps, and to have a conversation with a man that doesn't involve his eyes drifting dowwards...

Yes, you look like a pretty lady, RR! I have a prominent roman nose too! I hate it and pictures seem to "accentuate" the length. I've made a few procedures done and my nose is next. However, I have reservations because I don't want to start looking like Michael Jackson or the cat lady in NY. There's a fine line between natural and overly done, or just plain weird looking.

I would consider plastic surgery only if it was something that was physically bothering me, ie huge breasts, drooping eyelids, etc... I go against the grain here but I think aging women are most valuable and lovely when they concentrate on their inner beauty and knowledge rather than the packaging.

orngkat: That is a lovely sentiment. I wish the media felt that way...

I've been in the Mediterranean and Caucus areas a number of times in the last few years. Lots of people--including women--have Roman noses in that part of the world. Plenty of beautiful women around with their Roman noses. Women with husbands and children and families and lives. Their noses didn't seem to have a detrimental effect on their existance that I could tell.

It's all about the media. Not that I'm immune to the media blitz of beauty, I'm as self critical about my looks as anyone, but the barrage of western media hypes one kind of beauty. When you forage out in the world a little farther you see a lot of beautiful women who don't fit that mold--at all. Women who are plenty hot and beautiful with an array of non Holywood features.

For all of us though worldwide, I think the larger beauty issue is age. Over-50 women are not at the top of the hotlist. *sigh* No matter what kind of nose they're sporting.....

No plastic surgery will erase the years.