Welcome to The 30's Betwixt & Between Forum.

This forum is especially for those in their 30's. Feel free to discuss any special issues you've experienced in your 30's

For example:

How did you feel turning 30? Did you feel, as the "old" saying goes, you were now "over the hill?"

Do you think 30 something is the new 20 something?

Have you started perimenopause early? Is it a natural perimenopause, or have you been thrust into menopause due to surgical menopause (hysterectomy) or chemical menopause (chemotherapy)? How are you handling it?

Are there special relationship issues you've experienced in your 30's that you didn't when you were younger?

How has your relationship with your parents changed in your 30's?

How is being in your 30's different from your 20's?

Again, this forum is exclusively for those in their 30's. Go for it and share with us whatever you'd like in YOUR forum!

(Anyone, from any age group, can post in this forum and reply with their own experiences as long as it's applicable to the questions and comments posted about being 30 something)

Dearest

I am being treated for a hormone imbalance, I AM NOW 39 mine started last october, ik had alot of stress then everything started to go wrong, periods twice a month. sometimes a few days some times longer, mood swings were terrible, i would cry for nothing, feel anxious over nothing, my fuse in very small.
I then started to get brain fog my memory was terrible, i get off balance dizzy funny head really like i am looking through dirty glasses it seems at times my eyes take longer to focus, very strange and scary and yes i was convinced i had a tumour or something, I have been to my Dr every month now, I am being treated for anxiety and hormone imbalance.
Since october I take Diazapam for my anxiety
norethisterone for my periods to regulate them, the day i start I cry for nothing i have a build up of hormones then fine again.
the heads they can last for days or months,
I went every month saying are you sure its nothing horrible, he said no,you would know if it was. I would be suffering from severe headaches by now, its been nearly a year, he says i need to concentrate on my stress then my hormones will follow, easier said than done in my case,
my skin is terrible dry and itchy at times i get pimples like i am a teenager, so embarrasing,
I thank god the palps and flushes are not all the time now, but its the heads i hate the most i dont feel like me...
I cant remember what its like to feel normal anymore really, i have never felt this bad and didnt expect to be feeling like this before my 50's
I had a hormone thyroid test last summer thyroids fine,
hormones borderline whatever that means.
my stress level is through the roof at the moment, with one thing and another, i feel like just runing at times just for some peace and quiet. sorry about droaning on but sometimes when you start you just cant seem to stop.
I have also had my eyes tested need new glasses my eyes have deteriated not alot but a bit, so i now need them for reading and computer. one blessing having the eye test proved there was nothing nasty there i was convinced i had a tumour or something there and would show up with the eye test, what are we like talk about self torture, i have to stop myself self diagnosing myself,on the internet to be honest for 3 months i was convinced my dr was letting me walk around with a tumour, in my head i am amazed he didnt commit me to the local mad house, if he had suspected anything he would have done somehting i know from passed experience.

Why do we do this....... why do we lose all self control.......

I'm going to be 39 in another month. I've always been in good health and looked younger than my age until about a year ago. Wham-hot flashes, anxiety, fatigue, difficulty keeping my blood sugar up, horrible insomnia, dizziness, brain fog. I too could drone on and on. I kept thinking as well that something has to be wrong with me-thyroid, cancer, some autoimmune disease. How could hormones make you feel so bad? After seeing countless doctors, finally found one who believed that I could be in perimenopause. Although it's a relief to know that I won't die over this, it definitely s*cks! I feel like I've aged 7-8 years in one year. At my low point last Sept. and Oct., I almost had a nervous and physical breakdown. Then, I have the glory of having the pimply face of a teenager-I actually had pretty good skin when I was a teenager-this is something else. Yes, I definitely feel cheated of my youth, like my body is rebelling against me. Which stinks because I was taking pretty good care of it. The only consolation is knowing that there are other women here who share the same experiences-safety and security in numbers.

just turned 38 last week....i feel like i've aged a hundred years. this should be a wonderful time in my life!!!!!! its so unfair!!!! but......it could always be worse, so i am thankful for what i do have, and i will continue to fight to be well again. thanks for this forum.

Hi, folks! Just visiting from the "50's". As I was posting "Although I didn't realize it until later - I started perimenopause at about age 34", I thought of y'all...been there, done that! At least the doctors are beginning to believe you now - they didn't believe me until my hysterectomy at 42 - they found my ovaries were atrophied - then they believed!!! My best suggestion is to get to a doctor who believes you and will work with you to alleviate symptoms. (One who gets 51 is the average age for menopause - means "average" = some way younger and some way older) Yes, you can be in peri in your 30's. Sometimes it is called premature ovarian failure when it occurs in the 20's or 30's. I've heard antidotally many that had tubal ligations about 10 years before that went in to POF; but no studies I know of prove it. It could be coincidental, but I had a tubal ligation when I was 24 and started perimenopause at about 34??? Who knows? Anyway, I wish you the best and would be glad to share info if you want!

Zelma

thanks surfer for visiting us......it looks like i'm gonna have to join you guys in the 40' and 50's. where are all the 30's...we have to stick together girls.LOL

I am 31,my mother completely stopped bleeding at 45,so I think family history and stress are behind me starting at such a young age.(30)This has really changed how I look at life.I have had almost all the symptoms,anxiety being one of the worst.I am now on Yasmin(bcp)it is helping.I walk,drink more water,and take vitamins.Things I should have been doing before.At my last drs appt,I had lost 8 poundsWahoo!!I am so glad to have found this board as the support and understanding here are wonderful.As to how being in my thirties has changed me other than the obvious peri issue---I would have to say that I worry less about what other people think and try to enjoy my life more.I also am going to church more often,trying to say "i love you" to the people in my life more,and trying to be a better person.I have three wonderful kids all under the age of 13!I love my hubby,and he has been Wonderful through this.GOD bless you all.

Hi there!

I'm 39 and have had terrible insomnia for the past two months. I did develop anxiety around the same time (shaking, tingling), but it's mostly gone since I started the bc pill. I know I have some sleep anxiety though because I have nights where I can't fall asleep at all, when before I was able to at least fall asleep. My periods have been erratic for the past year so I have a feeling my problems arose partly due to peri. I'm really trying to not let this get me down, but after 2 months and sleep deprived, I'm crying more. I keep reminding myself this is just a phase and in time will pass. I'm grateful for this forum since it really helps me knowing I'm not alone. Being 39 and in peri is tough because some feel I'm too young to have started. I'm sure others in our age group feel the same way. It makes me confused as to whether or not I'm in it or not. My husband definatly thinks it's peri since we don't know what else could have caused my symptoms.

I try to look at the bright side and am praying more, not just for myself, but all of us suffering. I'm trying to put in my mind that this may actually be a blessing since I've made some healthy changes in my life. Now, I exercise daily, eat healthier, relax more, yell less, smile more (even when I'm feeling bad) and just really make the most out of everyday whether I'm fatiqued or not. Once this passes, I know I will be a stronger woman. I just wish I could get past the insomnia. It's such a burden.

Take care!

Hi But I'm only 39 and everyone

Just visiting as a member of the 40s club. But I'm only 39, you sound a lot like me at age 39. My sleep problems started at around that time when my periods got closer together. (I have PCOS and had 3 or 4 periods a year until I was 40, and then they became closer and closer until they settled at a regular 28/30 days cycle) It was during this time that sleep was a problem. I could fall asleep no problem but would wake up, sometimes feeling startled and anxious, sometimes warm, sometimes just plain waking up In short, like you, through lack of sleep over time I became moody, emotional, jittery, and felt a complete wreck .

Oh yes, and like many here I was told that I was TOO YOUNG for it to be anything to do with peri/meno. I was also confused, I though I must be losing it, what on earth is happening to me, my body etc.

39, I too have seen it as a blessing, albeit a mixed blessing . I began taking good care of myself, I now eat in a healthy way, for me eating regularly is the key. In my pre peri meno days I could eat 3 meals a day, now I eat 6 times a day and it REALLY does help.

Good for you for making the most out of everyday and yippee for being a stronger woman

Rather than go on HRT because of a family link with breast cancer, I am now having acupuncture with a naturopath to help with the waking and night flushing and it really seems to be helping.

Hugs robin (age 46 and a half )

Thanks Robin for the kind words. They are inspirational!

I'm so excited...I've slept a full night for 3 in a row!!! I know my insomnia started out in the beginning due to peri, but then I think I let it get to me, causing sleep anxiety. After two lousy months, I went to a hypnotist - a really good one. I went to her office, talked for awhile, even cried. She was so motivating and inspirational that after by the end of the conversation, I felt excited and very happy. She then hypnotized me and fed my brain with positive messages and suggestions. It was so invigorating and relaxing. She made me a tape of our session to play before I go to bed and I think it relaxes me so much that I forget about my anxiety and fall asleep. Ever since the session, I've been on cloud 9. When I hear the tape played, I get such a smile on my face and fall asleep so happy.

She is also an RN. Funny thing... the first thing she said to me in her office (without me mentioning it at all) was that she suspected I might be in peri. After telling her about my symptoms she thought I definately am in it.

I can't say I won't have more insomnia (although I feel I'm on the right track), I feel more positive that I can overcome this.

Hello all - have recently discovered this forum - finally people who can understand what's happening to me! I was 39 in May and since then I have been constantly feeling "ill" --- nausea in the mornings, chest tightness, pelvic pressure, fatigue. I have had all the tests and an ultrasound and everything looks normal - yeah right! I mean how can I feel so nauseous and nothing be wrong. My periods are coming closer together and are lighter .... my Doctor has no answers and I just "know" it's my hormones wreaking havoc ... my mother went through a similar time and had finished menstruating by about 46. It's really beginning to wear me down. I am a single parent and run a business from home which adds to the pressure. Glad there are people here that I can "moan" to.

[quote name='zeba' date='Aug 1 2007, 01:14 AM' post='180482']
Hey Zeba-
I just turned 39 a week ago and I totally relate. Before I found this forum I was convinced I had some autoimmune disease, cancer, SOMETHING-that would make me feel this bad. I've given up on doctors helping me. Having someone to gripe to who understand is sometimes the best medicine. My worst things are-fatigue, anxiety, insomnia, nausea and just a general feeling of not feeling right. I think it totally s*cks to be this young and have to deal with this B.S. At least I'm eating better than I ever have in my whole life. That helps greatly, and sometimes just getting a good walk in helps too. God bless, this website is wonderful. What kind of business do you do?

Hi Dakotalady,
Thanks for your reply! I'm an online bookseller .. left my job as a journalist at Christmas to pursue this as it has been a "hobby" for a few years ... not that I can get that motivated at the moment. Woke at 4am feeling nauseous - took a ginger capsule and went back to sleep. It's now 9.20am and I'm still queasy - blah. I get this tired, almost flu-ey feeling behind my eyes with it too. I'm only on Day 8 of my cycle, so may get another couple of weeks feeling like this. I wonder if this will ever stop. I just want my old body back again. I have been starting to watch what I eat and have cut out alcohol and coffee. I had a couple of wines though of Saturday evening and ended up throwing up the next morning, even though I hadn't had much at all. When I do feel good - I feel great. At least if there was something seriously wrong I would feel bad consistently. I just feel a sense of impending doom thinking I may have 10 years of this ahead of me!!!! Anyway, once again thanks for your words - yes, might get out in the fresh air for a walk soon.

This is GREAT! I am new to this site. I am 39 and really thought I was too young for this. Here's my story. I never connected my symptoms to perimenopause until this past month. It was this time last year that I thought my periods started to change. However, I was wrong. My periods have always been very regular (28 days). I could almost set a clock by them. About 2 years agao they started coming every 23 days. Very heavy and now a new regular. Last July I had my first scanty period but then the next month it was back to normal. Then, I didn't have a period for 3 months. When it hit (New Years Eve) it hit with every thing it had and I bled for weeks. This is where it gets interesting for me and when I read some of the postings I just had to add my 2 cents worth. My breast had been so sensitive for the 3 months that I hadn't had a period. They were sore, heavy and I felt like I was have let down like when you nurse a baby. As it turns out I have a pituitary adenoma (a prolactin secreting tumor in the pituitary gland). This is a benign tumor and for all those women out there who have noticed a large change in thier breasts it is worth having their prolactin levels checked. Who knew? I was put on medication and things settled down but then in May it started again. My prolactin levels are normal but my periods have stopped. My hormone levels are good (estrogen a little high) and my docotor thinks I am too young for perimenopause but I feel in my heart that this is where I am at. After reading so many of your stories I am realizing that I am NOT too young and it is a great blessing to have found others who are sharing my life story at the moment. Looking forward to hearing from all you fabulous women out there. Luey

hi luey and welcome. i'm so glad you found us !!! you have really had a rough time, but thank goodness they found the tumor. that stuff can create all kind of havoc in our bodies. i have thyroid disease, so i can relate to this endocrine nightmare, plus the female hormone fluctuation . many docs think women are too young for peri when in fact they are suffering with all the symptoms. its a good thing you listened to your inner voice. glad to have you on the board, hugs kelly

Hi All,

I havent posted anything for ages, I first started to use this site last year when I started to get ectopic beats although I found the ste really useful everyone on the forum seemed to be a lot older (am 32). I went to see a cardiologist and had stress test, 24 hour monitor and an echo where everything showed as normal.

My GP had put it down to my stressful job, and in fairness he had been saying this for nearly a year, in the previous year I had cluster headaches a run of really fast palpitaions that didnt want to go away, when it first happened i was at work in a competely relaxed environment and it seemed to kick off for no reason, I expected it to stop and it didnt, it resulted in me being taken to hospital in an ambulance where loads of tests were carried out, ecg's, chest xrays and they found nothing. It then happened again a year on when i was seeing the cardiologist and again 8 months on but twice in the last 2 months. The way I thought I could control it was by lying down, it then seemed to stop, but the last time it happened it didnt .The GP told me to hold my nose and blow as this stimulates the vagus nerve and that didnt seem to help. I was now in a blind panic wondering if I should just call an ambulance, I didnt but it did stop after what felt like an eternity.

The ecoptic beats seem worse around the week before my period, but I can handle those.

At the moment I am not sleeping and havent had a proper nights sleep for at least 2 months, I went to see my GP recently for nausea she asked me if I had been tested for Thyroid problems due to my palps, no one has mentioned this before so they are going to do a blood test to see what that says.

I have also read that Omega 3 is really good for the heart palps so i will start taking that as well.

I think the strange thing is when it happens to you, you feel like you are the only one its happening to, you look around you and everyone else sees normal, its nice to know that I am not alone at all.

x

hi angle, please make sure your doc checks these test for thyroid: thyroid antibodies, free t4 and free t3 i'm sure she will do a tsh, but these others are really important. good luck hugs, kelly

:rolleyes:HI, I'm new...I'm 36 and have entered Perimenopause...I still don't know if all my symptons related to perimenopause but at least it is something...I did have my hormones tested to tell my I was in Peri...though my regular doctor doesn't believe that's what I have. He keeps bringing up MS but I really don't believe that's what I have...my symptons (and I'm hoping some of you have these are): internal shaking (especially sleeping at night) some type of shaking or vibration in the chest (not all the time), muscle twitches (again not all the time) I get tingling in my legs and arms, kinds feels like its going to go numb but doesn't. Buzzing the pelvis and sometimes leg. I'm extremely tired...have night sweats on occasion...heart palps on occasion too...Please, any feed back I would soooo appreciate!!! Oh, I'm also a mother of 2 girls with a wonderful husband who totally supports me...just a little FYI there...THANK YOU!!!

I think that yak55m intended to post this here:

HI, I'm new...I'm 36 and have entered Perimenopause...I still don't know if all my symptons related to perimenopause but at least it is something...I did have my hormones tested to tell my I was in Peri...though my regular doctor doesn't believe that's what I have. He keeps bringing up MS but I really don't believe that's what I have...my symptons (and I'm hoping some of you have these are): internal shaking (especially sleeping at night) some type of shaking or vibration in the chest (not all the time), muscle twitches (again not all the time) I get tingling in my legs and arms, kinds feels like its going to go numb but doesn't. Buzzing the pelvis and sometimes leg. I'm extremely tired...have night sweats on occasion...heart palps on occasion too...Please, any feed back I would soooo appreciate!!! Oh, I'm also a mother of 2 girls with a wonderful husband who totally supports me...just a little FYI there...THANK YOU!!!

Hello, I am 39 years old and have been going through a lot of the same as you all. Mine all started last November. My 16 year old daughter moved in with my mother because she hates her step-dad. I was so depressed, I felt like such a failure. Anyway I started having panic attackes, I thought I was going to loose my mind. I was paniced all day for days. I finally went to the doctor in January and was put on Lexapro and xanax. I took the lexapro for 2 weeks and it did help, but I didn't want to be on antidepressants I felt I should be able to deal with my problems with out drugs. I also was afraid of loosing my sex drive, I did not need that issue in my marriage. I do think that I am in peri. My periods have got very heavy over the last 5 years. I am still regular, every 28 days. I have been having chronic yeast infection for years but have gotton worse over the last year. I would get one after my period almost ever month. I have the internal shaking, that keeps me from falling asleep. The xanax helps me sleep. But I have recently stopped taking it altogether. I also have restless leg syndrome and have had it since my pregnancy of my now 8 year old. I really think it is caused by a varicose vein in my pelvic area. This month I have a new symptom, since the end of my period I thought I had a yeast infection so I treated it, but I am still itchy, the itching is mostly on the outside not on the inside and I am spotting. I also have been itchy all over my body for the last 2 days, mostly my head, chest, stomach area and back. Its driving me crazy. I generally don't fell like myself, I am always a little paniced, I feel tired a lot. I can never stay awake past 10pm, I am very irritable, can't remember anything. I don't sleep very well, I wake up alot and sometimes with that paniced feeling. Reading usually gets my mind off it and I fall back to sleep. I always have a book around. My sex drive is not at all as high as it used to be. Oh, I also have been addicted to eating ice since this all started last winter. Weird? anybody else do this? \
I love this site, it has helped to feel not so alone. My mother didn't have any of this, and neither did my grandma. My paternal grandmother is dead so I don't know when she went through the change. I have figured out that I am not going crazy and that helps so much. I cried for days because I really thought I was loosing it. This site has been a huge support for me. I don't post much I just read.
Thanks.

Bump-

I'm in my 30's and would love if anyone else going through peri in their 30's would raise their virtual hands!

Hello
just got my bloods back....could anyone please decipher these?

I,ll try to be brief...


blood tests show I am anaemic {which I knew}

my serum ferritin is 7 ug normal range is 10-160

my FSH is 6.9 which means I,m not Menopausal (well what the hell are the flashes,sweats,non existent libido and awful sore breasts then?)

LH level - 2.6 iu/L

my progesteroen was less than 0.6 nmol

but I got a bit of a telling off for asking for an extra test (p) as it should have been done on day 22 not day 3
well,I wasnt to bloody know!!! still the result looks very low
even though I,m not classed as Menopausal...if my p test comes back low on day 22 I wondered wether I would be given any treatment? I just KNOW I must be in PERI !!!

I did have the Mirena coil which released small amounts of progesterone every day and it seemed to work...no heavy periods,no sore breasts,iron levels going up,more energy,slight urge to take hubby to bed! didnt last long though..........the urge, not my hubby's performance hahaha lol ....well if u dont laugh you just cry...
but then coil fell out ....twice.....and I am not getting much in the way of another choice!!!!!
nurse at hospital said I wasnt producing enough progesterone 2 years ago!
any advice please?

Hot flashes, night sweats occasionally, shakiness, a buzzing in my back (what in the world IS that? I've seen many other mention it), fatigue, and waking up in the middle of the night...usually not for long, but I used to sleep like a rock. I've had anxiety and panic attacks as well. My OB GYN put me on pristiq and I think that has really gotten rid of the panic attacks, not sure if what I have left is still some anxiety or hormones.

A long standing problem for me is dizziness. I've been dizzy now for nearly 6 years. Chalked it up to allergies, now wondering if it's inner ear....nobody can seem to find any reason for it. MRI was clear. Lots of heart tests all ok.

One weird thing...I went into the dr. yesterday with UTI. I had been feeling pressure in my bladder and felt WEIRD up there but I thought it was anxiety since it wasn't burning when I peed (until yesterday!!). I guess I've had the infection for a while now and didn't know it. Never had that happen before that I remember.

I am 30 and probably too young to be in peri BUT something is going on and I do think it is hormonal. I have two kids, the youngest of which is 3.

You may very well be in peri. I am 32 years old and smack dab in the middle of it. My symptoms started at 30 but I wasn't told it was peri until i was 31 years old. My doctor is very concerned because I am so young, but she still says it is peri. Hold on because it will be a ride of your life.

Wow you ARE my age. I am hoping my doctor will listen and not just dismiss my symptoms.

I had to see three different doctors until someone would listen to me. They all looked at me like I was crazy until this last doctor. she said I think you are in peri so lets do some hormone testing and then put me on prempro. Hopefully your doctor will listen but if he/she doesn't find a second opinion.

Okay well I found the dizziness thing was due to damage to my right inner ear nerves. Got that one figured out at least. I don't feel better, but I am very happy to know it's not in my head. Now on to the other issues I'm dealing with.
I tried the pristiq and felt better mentally BUT I was not sleeping well and having some of the same weird surges in the morning and shakiness throughout the day...so I went off it. Now OFF it I have begun to wonder if those things weren't all because of the pristiq....I am still having surges like I did before the pristiq. Two days in a row (I am on the tail end of a period so it didn't shock me but still...).
My OB GYN looked at me like I was nuts when I told him about my hot flashes (their is a furnace inside me working overtime!!), surges, shakiness....He said he had no idea why I was feeling that way since I was still having periods....although I think my last one came EARLY...it seemed at least a week early.

What's a girl to do now? I've considered seeing if I can be referred to an endocrinologist (I've met my deductible this year b/c of a hospital stay and gallbladder removal so it's kinda free dr. visits at this point).

Hi there, I am 38 and single, never married... I always wanted to get married to a great guy and have a quiver full of kids. I was googling "pregnancy after 40" to get some hope--I found a lot of amazing stories and was very encouaged. Then I stumbled on sites that talked about perimenopause and its symptoms, and with much shock and horror am discovering that I AM in perimenopause--internal shaking at night (could swear there's an earthquake every night and my bed is shaking), insomnia, decreased libido, tingling under the skin, heart palps, fatigue...

I am so scared and depressed. I can't believe I missed out on having kids. So much for hoping for the 40s..... This is awful. Like others have mentioned, I feel like I've aged 7 years in the past year or two. I feel old and ugly all of a sudden. Youth is soooo fleeting.....

Hi there...I just read your post and really wanted to reach out & give you a virtual hug. I am not an expert (of course) but would suggest going to seeing an endocrinologist or anti-aging/holistic medicine doctor to have your hormone levels checked. I've had all of the symptoms you've described above for the last 6 months (off and on). I suffered a miscarriage in the spring and haven't felt the same physically ever since -- before that event I had NONE of these symptoms at all. It's been a horrible summer where I've worried I'm dying of some horrible disease. AFter a lot of doctor's visits & tests (and the confirmation that my estrogen & progesterone levels are in the healthy rage for a 34 yr. old and I'm not having premature ovarian failure) the specialist I've recently begun seeing says she believes I am dealing w/ low cortisol and thyroid issues. I am waiting for more test results. I bring this up because it might give you some peace of mind to have your hormones checked. From reading this board & my own experience it seems like some women are just VERY sensitive to ANY hormonal fluctuation and as a result experience a lot of symptoms even if their levels appear in the normal range. I have always had PMS and strong reactions to hormonal fluctuations seem to run in my family (Mom, Sister & Maternal Grandmother). Perhaps we are both starting perimenopause but it can last 10-15 years so please don't despair about having a baby just yet.
I hope you have a good friend you can talk to about your worries. TAke care. Sarah

Like Sarah said...don't worry about having a baby. First of all worrying about it makes it more difficult....but secondly I am proof that you can have a baby while deep in the throws of peri. If you search on some of my more recent posts you will see that it isn't easy going through the post-partum period while in Peri....but my little one is all I need to smile and forge ahead.