hi ladies,

ok faithcain, listen to me, you're not dying either, neither is Seana, or myself. or a bunch of us! It sure does feel like it though! I am in the exact ssame spot as you are, every symptom you have, I have, for pete sake, I can'teven type right here!
I have to keep backspacing to correct the spelling because for some 'unknown" reason, my hands are shakey, and I seem to mispell these words, geez! Now, I have the racing heart, the weird head feeling ALL THE TIME, (you must have read my crazy posts by now, I mean, the left side of my head is totally weird, and lots of days it's the whole head!!), the stuffy feeling, the dizzy, lightheaded, "off balance" thing, (the off balance thing has been going on now for over a week, and it's sickening!), today it's a little better...but then again, I'm supposed to get my period any day now. When you described that "racing" feeling throughout your whole body? That;s me! It's not just my heart, it's my whole body. As far as head feelings, holy cow, this is bad! I get head pains, head weirdness, whoozy, spaced out, "NOT HERE' sensation (like you're dreamng all this, like you're in a dream), sometimes "electrical jolts" feelings, my left eye is "weird" which is hard to explain..it just feels like it's not really in my head, it's as though it's floating outside my face somehow, the vision is fine and when i had a complete eye exam recently he said, it's all fine, so it can't be the actual eye .....- but there's so much darn weirdness going on in my body....if it's not one thing, it's another, one after the other , quickly too! You don't get time to breathe! I know what you mean about other women around you seeminly not affected by this, that's what I feel too! It "seems" like other women I know, don't have it like this! NOT THIS BAD! ok, they have hot flahes, maybe some mood swings here and there, but NOT LIKE ME!

Since January, I've been through insane leg symptoms, varicose veins, weird painfull body symptoms (very scary), and now it's moved up to my head! I feel as you do faith, I feel as though I really can't take this, and apparently, it's supposed to continue too! WHAT HAPPINESS! I am a nervous wreck these days, and I was never like that. I was the one OTHER PEOPLE came to for help and advice, can u believ that? Probably not! ..lol...but it's true. Now, I'm a bundle of nerves most of the time, heart palpatations, head symptoms ALL THE TIME now, sinus problems, racing feeling in my body, can't sleep, can't eat properly, and I too, end up having to sleep on the couch because for SOME UNKNOWN REASON, I don't want to lay in my own bed! YEP, thats right, it's not just "emotional" however, it's also a physical reason, because my couch is so "fluffy"..lol...and I fall asleep much easier on it, than on my bed. I have to sleep sometimes in a sort of semi sitting up position, just feels better. I am always "weird" these days, TOTALLY NOT MYSELF, and I don't know how to get myself back. And forget about health anxiety...holy moly! Im loaded with it! If this had been me say, five years ago, I'd have brushed off most of these symptoms with the reasoning that it's just "something", no biggie....NOT NOW! OH boy, do I know what you're feeling!


My BP has also gone up, 144/90, that's the latest one as of two weeks ago. He didn't feel I needed any BP med.s' so, ok. But about a week before that, it was "normal", so here we go. I'm searching for ways to keep that down, naturally. If I find some, I'll post it. There has to be some natural remedies for this stuff. Don't feel alone, I too am searching for "answers", it is scarey, and debilitating. I thought to myself, geez, if I had a job, I'd have had to have quit, I am serious, I can't get out of bed somedays, not due to emotional, but mainly physical. I do end up forcing myself , but somedays, it's really hard. Other days, I wake up with my heart racing, and the feeling of constantly needing to urinate (it's not a UTI), it comes and goes....and who knows what! It's something new everyday, and when I read some posts of ladies that have been on this site for a few YEARS still going through this stuff.....OH BOY, this is going to be fun. This is a very big adjustment for us all, we all used to be "normal" women, who could do "normal" tasks, and now, we feels very vulnerable and helpless. But, at least we all have each other here, and I thank God for that!

OK, enough......I'm going to sit on my back porch, and sun myself, and fall asleep.....AGAIN! LOL!

sincerely, MyDarling

Hi - I've been reading through messages this evening and noticed you mention your blood pressure and a desire for a natural way to bring it down. Potassium is supposed to help get it down, so you could increase your intake of avocadoes, potatoes, bananas, orange juice and tomatoes or tomato juice. All very high in potassium. Hopefully, you like or are able to eat one or more of them.

This worked for me two years ago, and I am trying it again now myself because mine is slightly elevated - anxiety probably. Mine often gets to just about where yours is, 140's over 80's to 90, then other times it is back down to 120's over 70's. for the last six days, I have been eating a half avocado with some fresh salsa every day for lunch. And with a small glass of orange jucie on the side.

It's worth a try and certainly harmless.

Marie

Dear My Darling,

I have been following your posts and feel like I'm reading about myself X 10. All of the things that you have written, I have thought, but have been afraid to vocalize. My youngest son, left for college about 4 years ago, right in the middle of my "peri" menopause. I didn't know what was happening to me, I thought, and my doctor thought that all of my "weirdness" symptoms was caused by stress. It's like I was no longer comfortable in my body. Everything was scary. Every sensation was something "serious". I had like electrical shocks through my head, had brain scan, everything ok. I had constant dizziness, off balance feeling that went on for literally months, had an ENG by a ear/nose/ throat doctor, everything fine. Had chest pressure and palpitations, and skipped beats, went to cardiologist, everything fine. Had shakey hands, weak legs, went to neurologist, everything fine. I had pressure and bloating and had to pee all the time. Went to urologistk, everything was fine. EVERYTHING that I was experiencing was anxiety related. I am convinced of that now, but at the time I could not possibly believe that stress would cause the symptoms that I was having. I could no longer live a normal life. Everything was out of kilter, scary, uncomfortable and I began to feel afraid to be alone, to go places alone etc. I would spend hours on the computer looking up my newest symptom. My poor husband, would try to convince me that I was all right, that I did not have to go to the emergency room for what ever the symptom was at that time. I would get angry at him, because how did he know how I felt, and how does he know that it wasn't an emergency? When my doctor would prescribe pills or my cardiologist would want to do additional tests" just in case" I would be afraid to take the pills, and afraid to do the tests How did I get past it? I have a bottle of Zantac in my purse, just in case, and I convinced my doctor that I would not have a shot that would speed up my heart so that they could do a nuclear test (that was one, that really freaked me out) like your iodine thing. He agreed that he did't think it really was my heart either.

Well, I'm on the other side, right now, through with all the scary symptoms, feeling really good, actually. So, it's easy for me to say at this time that it will be OK. But, I also know that it will be back, it always does. How did I get here? I'm really not sure. I think I finally convinced myself that it was anxiety. I walk everyday. And even though, we just moved to another area, and everything is new and different, I still feel good. I LOVE the days I feel normal. I rejoice in them. I appreciate them. I feel like I can never feel the old awful way again. And that is I nice feeling. It tears at my heart when I hear from someone who is in the depths of H___ like I had been. I totally understand what you're going through. Until you fully understand that you really are OK, will you feel better.

Body and mind are very much intermingled, and we can really help those symptoms along, when we are only trying to make them go away! Good luck to you and I hope that you feel better very soon. I had kept a journal when I was going through this trying time, and it really helps to go back and read what I was thinking at the time. Your journal, will be your posts. I think you will be surprised in 6 months when you read them, just how far you've come. ..... Hugs, Worrywart Mary

Dear Marie and Mary,

thank you girls for your posts! I will try to up my potassium intake then, can't hurt. I love avacadoes too! Sounds like a "tasty" therapy! LOL. ... as far as all those symptoms go that continue to dog us ....well, Mary, I hope this all stops soon....and yet, I know I have a while to go ... which isn't good. Even today, right now, I'm shakey (so it's hard to type, I keep spelling wrong!), i feel "weak", and I'm off balance again, with that ver yvery DETACHED feeling! Like I'm in a dream, and no matter what, I can't get out of that! I splash cold water on my face, and that doesn't work, I drink or eat somethig..THAT doesn't work either...nothing works to "snap me out" of this weird place I'm in....this spaced out, off balance, dream like state! I hate this! I don't want to wake up most of the time, because you dn't know what to expect anymore. I had stupidly thought that "the change" was something that would sort of slowly build up, and you're "symptoms" would be perhaps mood swings, or changes in your period...etc.....NOT ALL THIS! These symptoms make you think you're dying of some awful disease! From what I've read here, most of the women who've been through all the tests, are fine...and these tests always come back "neg.", so, it's really just hormonal in nature, and yet, these symptoms are enough to make you think you won't be long for this earth! LOL....this off balance feeling is bad, I mean, I'm walking to the side, I have to grab onto something sometimes just to steady myself....I have had this off balance thing now for over a week, except for yesterday....then, I was fine, i even felt like MYSELF again! I couldn't believe it! Yes, the whole day, i was shocked! UNTIL, today. It's back. Some days I feel "pre - flu", like youre going to get the flu, but you don't. Mostly, it's the off balance, shakiness, weaknesss, fatigue, weird sleep hours, and oh yes, the thing I'm most famous for on this board, my LEFT TEMPLE PRESSURE and squeezing! LOL>..now, THAT seems to have subsided, but it's been replaced with OFF BALANCE!
It seems that if one symptom goes, you get a REPLACEMENT SYMPTOM.....does that sound familiar? it's like it goes to some other part of your body! This is true, becaue, in Jan. I first started with bad leg symptoms, burning, hot/cold, tingling, pins and needles, and then varicose veins would pop out! My legs hurt so badly, I've been to the ER twice! They gave me xanax...lol

But then, see, once that was "past" (it's been back, it's shown its ugly little head from time to time again), then we went up to MY HEAD! yeah, so back in Feb. I saw a vein on my LEFT TEMPLE that I hadn't seen before, and became panicky, becaue I thought it was the same thing happening on my head as on my legs....I think I may have been right, the symptoms are the same....my left temple began to PRESS in...and there was this weird squeezing (the squeezingwas also felt on the joint outside your ear, the TMJ joint) .. .that went on for 6 weeks! (just like my legs) ... now that that's better, (I still get it, but not as much), NOW IT'S THE OFF BALANCE THING! HOLY COW! It's a replacement symptom!

well, enough "happy" htoughts..LOL....I'm just thankful for the sunshine, the moonlight, the ocean (I live on the ocean, here in FL>), the birds, the beach, the smell of coffee brewing, the flowers....etc........I have to keep my mind on the good things, because you can get very depressed feeling this incapacitated! You suddenly feel as tho you're 99 yrs. old and hobbling along!


ladies, PEACE TO US ALL......we really need it! Mary, how are you NOW, now that this is "over" , sort of ..lol....thank you for your encouragemetn, i am trying to tell myself this will all pass one day, and I'll be normal again, but you're right, that's very hard to believe right now .... and what's funny is, it doesn't seem like OTHER women i see arond me have this problem ... they SEEM to be functioning just fine! maybe not.

Sincerely, MyDarling

Hi MyDarling

I finally introduced myself formally today so I won't repeat what i wrote there but I can relate very well to the feeling of it always being something, of one thing no sooner getting better than another symptom taking its place. And as for feeling like you are dying, well there have been many days when I WISHED I was dying, and fast. Just soooo fed up with how I have been feeling and unable to understand it at all. The idea that it may be at least partly hormonal is finally starting to take hold. The realization that this may continue for a long time yet is very disheartening.

I cycle in and out of feeling sick all over, with horrible muscle tension that will subside at times but never completely goes away. For a few months I had strange pains in my legs. these were replaced by pelvic/genital area pain in mid Dec. That has moved around the pelvis area for the past four months. It began in the bladder area, moved to the crotch, now settled in the rectal and buttock area. Driving me nuts really. I think it may be ultimately muscular in origin, but I have found through the internet several scary conditions that could also account for it. I try to dismiss the fears this has created, AND I have given up all looking up of symptoms. Others here have recommended that , and these days I do too. These searches on symptoms just lead to needless worry. And too much exposure to horror stories - which the internet is full of - is really bad for fragile nervous systems and emotions.


It is great that we all have this place to come to.

Marie

HI Girls,

Marie, yes, I've had the painful buttock, pelvic floor area, etc. and was really worried about that one. It turned out fine, and when the doc gave me the A OK it just went away! At one time I remember having a very "tight" abdomen and is I was in the middle of a sit up and coulodnt' relax my muscles. After a few days, it also went away. My Darling, I honestly can say that I don't know what makes these weird symptoms come and go and at the present time (knock on wood) I have been pretty darn normal. When I get a little skipped heartbeat, or a wild hot flash, I just let it go and tell myself it's ok, I'm ok. It's when I work myself up over things, that everything starts to escalate. You may in a past post heard me tell of an analogy of anxiety that I read in a book. I think the book was called The Anxiety Workbook or something like that, but anyway, in the book, it explains that anxiety is like a "dragon". The dragon knows what causes your fears and what makes you anxious. It knows what symptoms it needs to throw at you to get the viscious cycle going (the more you worry, the more the symptoms, the more the worry). Once you stop worrying about the symptoms, the dragon retreats and then will try again with a whole other symptom until it can once again consume your life with the anxiety cycle. Yes, the fluctuating hormones do cause anxiety, but I've been dealing with anxiety since I was in my 20's, so this is not new to me. I did'nt realize the past few years was from menopause, I just figured it was my normal "anxiety" flare up again, that darn dragon! So, here I am 2 years post menopause, still having hot flashes, still having palps, still having anxiety, but I've learned (or I should say, trying to learn) not to work myself up over everything. That alone, causes everything to escalate. I REALLY believe researching each little symptom is a very BAD idea. It gives the dragon just the food he needs to make things worse. If we truly have something seriously wrong, I'm sure our bodies will let us know, in no uncertain terms.
You've done the right thing by getting checked out, and once that is done, chalk it up to the dragons revenge!

Mary

Mary - If you don't mind me asking, how long did your buttock/pelvic issues last and what did the buttock stuff feel like. I ahve had the pelvic issues for almost 4 months now, but the major buttock stinging/soreness near the "crack" and the anal/rectal discomfort for about two weeks. Before that it was more vaginal, but also with sensation of foreign object in the rectum at times.

As for getting it checked out, I wouldn't know how. I have been going to a physical therapist for pelvic floor dysfunction and at first thought I was getting improvement, but then came this buttock pain setback. The condiiton I am afraid of is something called pudendal nerve entrapment. It is a more a mechanical condition, but one that can't be really helped and can ultimately become quiet painful and debilitating. Right now, i am still hoping all of this is muscular in origin, and considering the BHRT to see if that helps with anxiety and ultimately with muscle tension.

Marie

Hi Marie,

I'm going to really strain to remember because it's been a while ago. But, the "heaviness" feeling down there in the vaginal area lasted about a month I think. I remember also feeling like my whole abdomen was heavy and weighted. Gyno checked everything our (of course I was worried about uteran cancer) I had a vaginal ultra sound. Everything ok. Left as quickly as it came. I think I was tensing everything out of worry. The rectum thing (felt like I had a pole stuck up there) did go away within a month too. I think I strained too hard with a bowel movement or something, my doc couldn't find hemoroid, but treated it like one. (I thought I had rectal cancer). Anyway, it went away also! I would say if you get it checked out and its all ok, then you will relax and the problem will subside. Feel better soon! Mary

Marie,

I too have had the pelvic tension, down the right buttock and even into the back of my leg, down it and into my heel at times. They thought it was sciatica at first, but that proved not to be the case. It is pure muscle tension. When my hubby rubs it, it helps, but it tightens up again in short order. I can feel it when I sit on it, but it seems to be getting better as time goes on. I've had it off and on for over 3 years now. I can tell when I'm stressed, it's worse. I started working out and that helped, but now have knee problems and can't run anymore. I am scheduled for the Orthopod next month and hoping they put me in Physical Therapy again to get the muscles strengthened. My main symptom...that goes along with the plain ol muscle tension is in my lower back...almost my buttocks. I WAKE in the morning with such pain in my sacral area that I have to do a pelvic tilt over and over to get it to loosen up. After I'm up, it stretches out and is fine for most of the day. It's the weirdest thing I've ever had, but I don't fret anymore...since I've had a ton of tests and they are rather insignificant in their reports. I guess I should be thankful for that. I know it's muscle tension b/c if I take a Niravam (like Ativan) it goes completely away. I don't take that often....so I deal with the tension!

~Cheryl