Okay, I'm a newbie. I'm 40, and have been experiencing many symptoms for 4 years. My gyn 4 years ago told me I was too young. Now, after reading a lot of everyone's comments, it seems like gyns say that to a lot of women.

So, last week, my period was due and instead of it coming, I've had major cramping and back pain, but no period. Last night, it was so painful. After Googling I found this site and I'm so glad I did!!! This is my first "phantom period" and at least I know that it's normal. I've experienced the night sweats, hot flashes, migraines, heart palpitations, etc.. My new gyn is working with me, so I'm happy about that. Although, it's wonderful to have a gyn that listens now, it's even better to have this site to connect with other women going through this!

Welcome CavalierLuv! I agree, this site is a great place to feel "normal" again! I have learned so much from reading the information here. I used to start my day off with my coffee and newspaper. Now I start with this site.

I second that! ME TOO!

Cavalierluv, I missed my last two periods and they were as you describe, phantom periods. I had cramping for each, was sure the periods were going to happen, but they didn't. I also experienced hot flashes and palpitations, approx 2 weeks after the first miss. They have, btw, gone away.

Get your hormones tested. Ask your doc to do it. There are, btw, other reasons for missed periods so those should be ruled out, but you ahve the classic peri symptoms. You can also order saliva test kits and do the tests yourself (you have to mail a tobe of spit to a lab). Figure out where you are hormone-wise and then devise a plan of action.

40 is absolutely not too young, and 36 really isn't either although 36 probably is on the early end. But hey, someone has to be early ! We can't all be average. :-) I am 46, looking back I can see I was peri at least as early as 39-40. I have missed two periods, if I am in menopause now I will be on the early side but not abnormally early, average age is supposedly 50-51, so again, someone has to be earlier than that.

This place is better than any Dr.'s waiting room or office. I have found such relief just having mini confirmations that I am not alone. I hope you too will be able to find comfort and peace of mind ready through the variations of peri!

Oh geez, my phantom period seems to have turned into a real period a week later. Gotta love a period where the cramps are a week in advance ! I saw some scant bleeding yesterday afternoon, nothing this morning but I wore a tampon just in case. And sure enough, TOM is here. Or Aunt Flo, whatever your favorite euphemism is. :-) I am now in the phase where I can never go without a tampon and a pad in my purse. Joy (not).

So far, my period hasn't come. I even decided to take a pregnancy test, just in case. It was negative, so now I feel better. I guess I'll be like you. I'll have something in my purse because I have no idea when it will come next. Should I just expect it next month or could it come anytime? This is my first missed period like this, so I'm winging it. At least the back pain and cramping stopped.

During peri apparently your period can come and go ... for years ! I missed in March 2006 and Jan 2007.

When I told my gynecologist that I'd had hot flashes but they stopped, she said "I'll bet you get your period next month". I think it was more a comment on me being in peri than a direct link between absent hot flashes and periods. I hadn't had any hot flashes at all before Jan 2007 and I missed my period that month.

I read a comment on a web site, something like "During perimenopause, variability is the norm".