Hi. I read the post above, and this one from another thread
"i do feel warm during the night but i think the worst hot flashes for me are during the day. lately i noticed i was sweating and didnt really feel that hot. i felt a little warm. it was a warm flash rather than a hot one, but the odd thing is that it was producing a lot of sweat. it is like my pores just open up and starting leaking and it goes on for about a good ten to fifteen minutes. this was producing more sweat than a hot flash. is this unusual?"
You really ought to talk to a gyno - maybe one a friend could recommend if possible. I'm just a horse-wife. but I'll have a go at answering this.
It looks like you're perimenopausal. This means your estrogen levels are down. It could also indicate your testosterone, dhea and thyroid are being difficult, too. Have you been checked for estrogen levels? Have you considered HRT?
Usually, hot flashes are hot. They can last 1 minute to 1 hour. You may, or may not sweat. There is a similar condition called vaso motor flushing. This causes heat and flushing on a longer scale.
Xanax, like many anti depressants, will curb the intensity of these attacks. Either it will rein in the sensation of heat, or the skin sensation, or both. I suspect that is whats happening with your warm flashes.
Now the vaginal thing
Many women report a reduction of sexual desire (libido) or sexual responsiveness, ie, difficult to climax or cant stay focussed. Bear in mind, for women orgasm can be achieved vaginally, or by the clitorus or for some, both ways. There's lots of variablity between women
With lower estrogen, your sexuality can be adversely affected. It may knock out your ability to achieve vaginal satisfaction, but leave the clitorial sensations alone. (I suspect if this is the case for you, you may wish to have a testosterone and a dhea test done, too) This would leave the clitoris and urinary nerves, which I believe interact with the opening of the vagina, in tact. This may be why it is a confusing sensation of being somewhere between the need to make a trip to the loo, my darling or something more sexual or sensual.
The other thing is Xanax is known for diminishing your sexual desire or responsiveness.
If this is a problem for you, speak to your doctor. There may be anti-anxiety drugs that will leave you alone in that department, or even give your love life a boost.
Hope that helps.