good afternoon all!!!! i have not been here much lately... i am sorry for that but... i have been feeling so good that i have been out and about... when i first came here i was a wreck!!!! i am sure some of you know!!!! thanks to all of you... tinks my adopted mommma!!! sguiggle my funny friend!!! mele the person who kept me thinking!!!! and so many others!!!!! lets just say i was 31 years old io months ago... weighing in at 226.... i had my first panic attack which followed with hot flashes!!!! oh boy... any ways after so many ridiculous tests and scares and no one listening except my peri friends here.... i think i have come to a brek in all this or i have learned to accept it more... i now am 157 pounds... i smile more... i eat better( veggie no meat) my cholesterol went from 207 to 153!!!! i am proud of me... but not without the help of so many of you.... i would come here everday for months and vent.. cry... ask questions... scream at the computer!!! but now i feel so good... all natural... no pills or shots!!! i still have not had the dr. say... yes you are peri but i did have all of you and i know that this is what it is... in april i went for a check on my breasts... because out of the blue they became sore... so i went to the local health dept. because i was tired of my gyno and regular dr. not helping me.... i went in the health dept. and told them about my breasts hurting and could they examine me.... i then was sent for a mammogragm... the nurse and a surgeon follow up told me i have fibrocystic breasts... i asked how does this occur?,,, they said hormone imbalance... i then told this breats surgeon about everything i had been through.... he listened to me!!!!! can you beleive it????? i told him all the horrid details... including my not smoking any more... no caffiene my weight loss etc..... i began to cry a little... not like i ususally did... he looked at me and smiled... he said... denise you are one of the strongest women if not person i have ever met... he congratulated me on the smoking cessation and the wight loss.... he said for me to keep up what i was doing... and that all will straighten out.... he asked me if i wanted to come back any time just to talk to him.... that what great!!!!! i then new on that day that i had fibrocystic breats and i was having peri symptoms!!!! i knew all along i just wasnt convinced... now i am... i just wanted to let all of you know that it does get better..... i went to walmart today for the first time in 10 months and i stayed in there over an hour... no panic attacks!!!!!! i drove by myself about 30 miles away and i was fine!!!! i have not had a major hotflah that stopped me in my tracks in a while..... this makes me happy!!!! so i used all my resources... drs.(what a joke)... books... i read alot... dr. lee and dr. love!!!!!! amen for them!!!! and God... i pray every night now where i hadnt before.... and my greatses source has been all of you here at power surge... you all have helped me find God... friends... and myself.... thank you so much!!!! and for those of you still searching... i promise you will find it!!!!! i finally get it!!!! i am going to be better because of all of you ... thabk you again for helping me find "me"... and i like the new " me"... so it happend a little early for me..... thats ok!!!!!! i love you all... and it is yet another great day to be alive!!!!!!!! denise

Denise - I'm so glad you are feeling better! We have missed you on the site! It's amazing what a kind ear and some major reassurance can do!

I also have had lumpy breasts all my life (fybrocystic?) - they are still lumpy now - but they have improved somewhat after I had kids & also gave up caffeine.

I really hope this well-being carries on for you - may your future be bright and peri-free!

Wow-this is great news. I am so happy you are feeling so much better and you found some doctors that actually listened to you.

Mopsy

I'm so happy for you and glad to hear that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Keep up the good work!

It did my heart good to read your post! You have been though so much, so proud of you!

Hey Denise -- your happy post put a smile on my face. I loved it! I have missed you and wondered how you were doing. That doctor sounds like a real winner, and you're so lucky to have found one who will listen to you. You ARE strong, just like he said. I'm so proud of you, and very, very happy too!

RedFox

Hey My Adopted Denisey Daughter, hip hip hooray you are here again and more important you have become whole again, so glad and proud of you now when you arent a busy bee come say hi here and there ok? Love your adopted Mama tinks

Hi Denise,
Gosh..........it gave me such joy to read your post. I am so happy for you ..............We've missed you,
Love
twitchyXX

Hi Denise

Your story is inspirational, thanks for taking the time to tell it. I am amazed at what you've accomplished.

I quit smoking too, in the middle of this extreme peri bupkiss, and it wasn't much fun, but look at you! You've lost somewhere in the neighbourhood of 75 lbs - I'm impressed! I couldn't shed 15, but I've sworn to have it off by New Years.

Write again with pointers, please!

I have gotten in touch with my creative side and am working and living as a visual artist. I have found that I operate mostly from the right side of my brain, and that when I am operating from the left side with all the technical and analytical stuff in operation--this is so totally not who I am and am totally stressed to the max. I loved art and music as a child but my life was never in a place where art and music was cultivated or recognized as a viable way of existing in this world. I remember that at 11, 12 and 23 years of age I briefly did some art work--drawing and painting, and I remember where it brought me to mentally, emotionally, physcially, and spiritually. But at that time, I just couldn't get a strong enough grip to hold on to it because of circumstances in my life. (Or so I thought and believed at those times.) In 1996 I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder, and the therapist wondered how I had made it through life as a child, teen, and adult without being on medication. I am still not on medication--it all pretty much affects me adversely. But thru this transition I have been traversing since 1992, I have been forced to weed out many things including my strong co-dependency issues. I am not finished with my journey but am in a much better place than all these former years including last year. I am now 58 years old. There are certainly some portions of my life I enjoyed briefly, but for the most part there is not too much that I would every want to go back too. I like where I am and am looking forward to what the future holds in a much more positive mind frame. Thank you all for being here. I look forward to reading your posts in this thread.

J

P.S. By the way, Denise, you are absolutely incredible. You are an inspiration. I look forward to hearing from you more.

J